Best friend confessed his attraction for me. Ick. Help?

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Wow, this thread really went.

Does your best friend consider your boyfriend to be some sort of rival? If so, maybe you should rethink your friendship with him. If not, just treat it as him being honest so long as he isn't making any sort of sexual move on you.

Just catching up on the rest of the thread Emlion.

I do hope that you are a bit clearer now about how you deserve to be treated. No one deserves a violent and controlling friendship no matter what you have done or failed to do.

I do also hope that Stefan really is by your side now and that you can work things out together.

Perhaps it is a good idea to get some further support. Relationships are hard for everyone, NT/AS or other. Loneliness can make you even more vulnerable to inappropriate or obusive friendships, like the one you described here, who has hit you in the past.

Perhaps some guidance from a relationship counsellor might help you along for the future.

Have you considered joining a club to make some new non romantic friends, if you have any passionate interests or hobbies?

It was great to read all the encouraging posts here from online well wishers, some of whom have shown you genuine consideration and care. There is after all the potential to make more friends and I do believe that you can make some new real life friends, where you are.


Something else to remind yourself of here incase you don't already know.....
"I knew you before I formed you in your mother's womb.." - Jeremiah chapter 1 verse 5 ( The Bible)

God knew you, as he knew Jeremiah, long before you were born or even conceived. HE thought about you and planned for you. When you feel discouraged or inadequate, remember that God has always thought of you as valuable and that he has a purpose in mind for you.




With that in mind, remember that you are loved far more than you might be aware right now. When you are inclined to go to the darker places in your thoughts or feelings about yourself, remember that God will always extend his hand towards you if you'll accept.

Hope emlion is ok now?

morning.
i don't have the energy to reply to all the posts seperately at the minute, but thanks for the support.

heres what happened this morning when we went to see my friend together:
he denied that he hit me more than one, that i was a lying b***h for even saying it.
the only reason he was ever my friend is because he heard i was easy and wanted some of that himself.
stefan got angry at him and defended me. i got upset because the things my friend said hurt and reminded me of people i used to know.
but, i won't see him anymore. - i've done nothing but help him in his life, and i'm not doing it anymore.
so i'm now friendless, but at least the people i know respect me.

You are not friendless. Remember all the people here who thought of you. That guy was a wolf not a friend.

Give yourself a chance to make some new friends when you are ready. Perhaps get some outside guidance if you need it, to help you recognise some of the signs of what makes a person a real friend and what does not constitute friendly behaviour.

But today, you and Stefan should do something nice and relaxing together and spoil yourselves.

I am relieved for you in fact, that the other guy is gone.

So your boyfriend is off to work?

Have you family nerarby? If not how about..... some activity you can do outside the home perhaps to keep yourself busy?

Came across this blog. You might find it helpful. It is a blog called, Aspergirls:A Guide for Women With Asperger's," and there is an article there by Rudy Simone, if you have time to check it out.

Here's the link.

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/asp ... -need-know

Here's a bit of the article below.

To sum up, for those on the spectrum who are of dating age, for your own safety and protection:


1. Have a code of romantic and sexual ethics relevant to you and approved by someone you trust. Keep it simple and easy to follow/understand. Remember that other people may think and feel differently. This is your code for you to follow, not impose on others, but it can keep you from allowing others to take advantage of you.


2. Have a neurotypical mentor to help de-mystify the dating process, including sex. They can help you understand and identify appropriate behavior, cues, etc.


3. Have an autistic mentor who is older than you and successful in life and/or love to do the same, He or she may have relevant insights and advice a neurotypical might not.


4. Continue this dialog with others to begin the process of change in schools and autism/Asperger support networks.


If you'd like to chat more privately, you are welcome to send me a private message to
http://www.aspbriggairl.com

I don't really do the selfhelp book thing.
Our relationship is lovely - he's a typical NT so he helps me with social things.

Yeah, he's at work all day - but i'm going to clean to flat from top to bottom to occupy myself. It calms me down.

I'm still sad and tired today, but at least i'm not like I was last night, I can handle myself today.

Positive thinking, yay!

Here is a link to a closed group where you can discuss relationship questions or matters if you are in an AS/NT or AS/AS type of relationship. It is non public.

It is called Aspires and is a closed yahoo group.

http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/as ... tionships/

Stefan sounds very understanding and I am happy for you.

I am married to an AS guy myself. The reason I joined this site was to learn more about AS and how I should interpret our communication and relationship, given new knowledge and understanding about AS. You are welcome to keep in touch. Right now, however, It is lunch time here in Ireland, so I am going to make some thing to eat now. Chat again soon hopefully.

It will take a little time to get over your disappointment, so take it easy on yourself too.

Pamper yourself a bit today as well.....

Smooches .

It's lunchtime here too. Yay for the UK!

That's not too far. My family are mostly in the UK, South of England and also in Scotland.


Now I am eating dinner, lol. Happy lunchtime to you,lol.

Hey emlion, I'm glad you're a little better today. I've mistaken people for friends who just wanted things from me, too. You can feel an sort of void when they're gone but in the grand scheme of things people like that are a scourge. It is better that they are gone. And you're not friendless - you have Stefan and we're here.

We got a snow day today so I'm home from work. Yay! So, if you want to chat or pm or anything, I'm around. I'll probably clean some, too. Everything seems to make sense when it's really clean and straight.