Here is photo of me...am I attractive , soso, cute, ugly?

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Joined: 7 Mar 2010
Age: 47
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Location: Leicestershire, UK

07 Feb 2012, 1:34 pm

I'm not exactly your target market here, but here goes.

1. Change your profile name if you can. It doesn't mean anything; if you can link it to your own name somehow, good. This is the least important tip here, by the way.

2. Change your tagline. "There are plenty of fish in the sea..." suggests you're not bothered about any particular fish that is reading your profile. Instead, play on your theme of looking for women out to try new things. Something like: "Why not try something different?"

3. Change the photo. I stand by my earlier comment that you're a good looking guy, but this photo doesn't work for you. Most of you is covered up, you aren't the focus of the picture (instead off to the left somewhere) and the shot is just too dark. We all think we look terrible in most photographs, so pick a nice day and get a friend to take a few dozen to a hundred. Don't pose. Just muck about a bit, take loads of photos and worry about them later. Even if 99 of them are duff, the 100th will be worth it... and will look more genuine.

Start with those and worry about the text later...

Alienboy
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07 Feb 2012, 4:39 pm

AnnettaMarie wrote:

I think you're very handsome. You have nothing to worry about! And if an Asian girl is going for you, go for her! Asian girls are very sweet and adorable, and she'll probably treat you well.

Try not to worry so much about how you look, after all, looks fade over time, and all that people are left with are their character, their intelligence, or their talent. Or all three. Or two at random.

Focus on yourself. Because looks fly faster than a bird in the sky.

Yeah I have no problem with Asian women. All my girlfriends have been Asian. I don't want anyone to think I am complaining about Asian women showing interest in me. I usually do go for attractive Asian women who show interest in me every time. I wouldn't mind a change once in a while is what I mean. Like dating a Hispanic, black or white woman...but that is what brought me to mentioning the Asian phenomenon in the first place. Here is how it works: "I think I want to date a non-Asian woman for once....oh wait...all non-Asian women I cross paths with treat me like the invisible man." So yeah. That is just a short summary of how things are with me. Really sucks.

Alienboy
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07 Feb 2012, 4:42 pm

Thom_Fuleri wrote:

Thanks for your post. This is helpful and I am not being sarcastic.

Alienboy
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07 Feb 2012, 5:14 pm

hale_bopp wrote:

Alienboy wrote:

hale_bopp wrote:

Mister Starfish? That just makes you sound rubbish in the sack.

The description is a bit cliche, but then again, what would I know, I'm not really the average girl, I like weird things about guys most women don't care about.

Haha yeah the username sucks I know. I can't seem to come up with a decent name that doesn't sound stupid argh! My description is cliche? Well I am hoping that the description of my first date isn't cliche either...

I would enjoy dating a woman who is open-minded and willing to try new things. E.G. Willing to try exotic foods, go para-sailing, hike mountains, go see a stand-up comedian, etc, because you haven't before. I would like to meet a woman who is spontaneous and likes to laugh. I enjoy being with a woman who likes to have deep conversations for hours at cafes, in front of a fire, or even up til the wee hours of the morning.

Some parts of this definitely do not seem cliche...but you meant the "about me" section right? Yeah...needs a lot of work. I suck at this stuff.

There's heaps of names. What are your interests I'll give you some ideas.

Ok here is a list of things I find interesting:

being alive , philosophy, psychology, sociology, songwriting, playing guitar, synths, novels, foreign films, staying up late, cooking, traveling, photography, geography, humanism, thinking green, animals, hiking, snowboarding, jungles, PC games, poetry, sculpting, drawing, boardgames, card games

There are much more rattling around in my brain...but this should be enough. I appreciate the help.

Lady-ivy
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07 Feb 2012, 5:21 pm

You are good looking but average. I easily find someone who looks like you on street. I if I saw you I would not be physical attractive to you. And yes I am part Asian but Indian wise.
Have you thought becouse you are in place were were there alot Asian people. You would seem exotic to them.

Alienboy
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07 Feb 2012, 5:24 pm

Lady-ivy wrote:

Yes, but this was only because I was so aggressively ignored by all non-Asian women and aggressively noticed by Asian women. It is really strange, but yeah it is what brought me to Asia to teach English and live there in the past.

hale_bopp
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07 Feb 2012, 5:29 pm

Alienboy wrote:

hale_bopp wrote:

Alienboy wrote:

hale_bopp wrote:

There's heaps of names. What are your interests I'll give you some ideas.

Play up the "cool" ones.. something like "snowboarding_dude" or something.

The_Face_of_Boo
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07 Feb 2012, 5:39 pm

Alienboy wrote:

hale_bopp wrote:

Alienboy wrote:

hale_bopp wrote:

There's heaps of names. What are your interests I'll give you some ideas.

Quote:

songwriting, playing guitar, snowboarding, poetry, sculpting, drawing, cooking.

You still can't get a girlfriend with all these?

Weird.

hale_bopp
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07 Feb 2012, 5:41 pm

He can get a GF. But only Asian women.

The_Face_of_Boo
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07 Feb 2012, 5:42 pm

I doubt that.

hale_bopp
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07 Feb 2012, 5:43 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

I doubt that.

According to him, I mean.

A bunch of women here said they think he's attractive. Non Asian Women who like guys like him are out there.

The_Face_of_Boo
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07 Feb 2012, 6:13 pm

Aspieboy, if you really have all these talents then you're not a dime in dozen nor a some clone guy in the street.

I bet those who said that about your looks earlier would kill to have a multi-talented guy like you.

I wish I have half of your talents.

Hey, I am not sugar-coating I am never known at this.

hyperlexian
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07 Feb 2012, 6:19 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

But I've said before, women's profiles are morel likely to be very brief and short, and i don't think the study is taking this into account (if yes, please quote).

they would have compared profiles of similar lengths, otherwise the data would be invalid.

by the way, you're off base in your assumption that women's dating profiles are usually shorter:

Quote:

Most self-descriptions were short passages, with 90 percent of them between 40 and 305 words. Men’s self-descriptions were 11 percent shorter than women’s, a median of 106 words for men versus a median of 118 words for women t (9,767) = 3.9, p < 0.001. Self-descriptions by those in their 30s, 40s, and 50s were 13 percent longer than those by younger or older people, t (4,538) = 7.9, p < 0.0001.

http://people.ischool.berkeley.edu/~atf ... s_2010.pdf

instead of getting other people to disprove your faulty assumptions, you should try doing the research yourself.

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Thom_Fuleri
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07 Feb 2012, 6:26 pm

Alienboy wrote:

Thanks for your post. This is helpful and I am not being sarcastic.

Thank you! I felt that, rather than just being given a load of opinions, you might find some more constructive feedback helpful. Certainly there have been enough times when I've been utterly baffled by something because I'm told it's not right without anyone telling me what to do about it.

The profile is like a job application. It's there to sell you as suitable for the position, but like the application it doesn't need to go into everything. It's there to get you to the "interview stage" (that is, a date). The date is when you make the real impact.

Oh, this may be obvious to you already, but I'd recommend not mentioning Aspergers on the profile page. It can scare people off. When you actually meet them, if things seem to be going well, that's a better time to mention it. People seem to have a subconscious impression that it means you're Rain Man or something.

Alienboy
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07 Feb 2012, 6:26 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Alienboy wrote:

hale_bopp wrote:

Alienboy wrote:

hale_bopp wrote:

There's heaps of names. What are your interests I'll give you some ideas.

Quote:

songwriting, playing guitar, snowboarding, poetry, sculpting, drawing, cooking.

You still can't get a girlfriend with all these?

Weird.

Well...I am shy. I don't exactly go around telling girls I meet: "Hey girl! I play guitar! Rock on!" Like some of the other douchebag musicians you find loitering at Guitar Center or local community colleges. I don't mean to brag, but yes I am pretty good at writing songs and composing, BUT women can tell I am shy and then my musicianship doesn't matter. Probably why geniuses like Beethoven were pretty lonely (aside from his gradual hearing loss). I am only an amateur at cooking, snowboarding and sculpting. I am no da Vinci...

hyperlexian
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07 Feb 2012, 6:30 pm

Alienboy, OKCupid has done a lot of research about effective profile pictures

http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/dont- ... -accident/
http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/the-4 ... -pictures/

it may be worth considering these articles. also, you may actually have some success on OKCupid as opposed to PoF if you don't already have a profile there.

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