OkCupid experiences?

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warsend
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09 Jan 2014, 6:59 pm

KC2014 wrote:

Well, they both live in the same area. One of them (the one that sent the rejection message) doesn't drive, so I had planned on catching the bus out to his area to meet up this weekend. Maybe a day after I had made plans with him, I made plans also with the other person and found out he lives near rejection dude. Both guys are on OKCupid a lot and had also hinted at not having many friends (rejection dude said all his friends had moved away,) so I figured we could all meet at the same time and if it didn't work out with me, they'd at least would have made a new friend in the area. It seemed the most convenient for both of them and also like it'd be fun ... very casual. Is this my AS being clueless?

I would imagine that he's saying that he finds me unattractive. It just seems weird how emphatic the "definitely" was ... like he had a definite idea as to what I looked like despite my not mentioning anything about my physical appearance. I do mention in my profile that I'm not monogamous, so maybe his assumption was that I must be high demand and thus attractive? Unfortunately, I sent a spate of messages to him that made me out to be as neurotic as I actually am. I really have no idea if I'm unattractive, but I'm starting to suspect I must be ... I also sent out my photo to other people I've been chatting with as it'll save both of us time. I had been chatting with rejection dude for two weeks! It is a little disappointing that now a few of them have opened the messages and not responded. I never thought of myself as very pretty, but am I really that bad looking?

yes....you are there to go on a date...why bring the other person with? If I was the guy red flags would be jumping everywhere. Why don't you have your picture up on your profile? None of this would have happened if you had it up so he could see it before you talked. You obviously don't want to be with a dude that straight up says that then.

KC2014
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09 Jan 2014, 7:07 pm

I don't have a picture up because there are too many people I know on there. In my first few days of browsing, I came across the profiles of all these people I know (including my cousin's boyfriend that lists himself as single,) so it'd be really awkward for them to know I'm on there ... but also for them to know I know they are on there.

The photo I've been sending: http://i.imgur.com/emDjtRy.jpg (I definitely have photos that are much better, but this is actually as accurate a representation as to what I look like everyday).

leafplant
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09 Jan 2014, 7:23 pm

KC2014 wrote:

You are very cute but asking two dudes to meet with you at the same time was definitely not the right thing to do. Dudes are not interested in being friends with girls or women or other dudes who may be competition. Schoolgirl error as the kids used to say :shameonyou:

KingofKaboom
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09 Jan 2014, 7:29 pm

If friendship is the clearly stated goal it's not a good way to make a date no.

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KC2014
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09 Jan 2014, 9:25 pm

floofy.

Last edited by KC2014 on 10 Jan 2014, 7:43 pm, edited 1 time in total.

KC2014
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09 Jan 2014, 9:30 pm

I don't really have a womanly body due to being pretty petite. So while I think my everyday attire isn't very revealing, maybe I need to send out photos with more form fitting clothing so I can high light what curve I do have. I mean dating is ultimately about sexual attraction ... or it is just friendship. So I need to work with what I have.

buffinator
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09 Jan 2014, 10:06 pm

in general the guys arent on there to meet other guys even just to be friends. Furthermore I garentee you most straight men who hear non-monogamous are thinking FFM threesome, so when the date is MMF...

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goldfish21
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09 Jan 2014, 11:51 pm

buffinator wrote:

so when the date is MMF...

[img][800:1200]http://www.my-walls.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/Eiffel-Tower-Lights.jpg[/img]

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equestriatola
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10 Jan 2014, 9:57 pm

I did try and meet someone from OKCupid, but she snubbed me saying she had other friends to meet. It's all behind me, though.

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Dox47
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12 Jan 2014, 7:33 am

KC2014 wrote:

Wow, that sounds awesome! I'm super excited to hear of your success ... hope the next date goes as well as the first!

Girl just left my house about 10 minutes ago (4:20am), so you could say that the date was quite successful. :wink:

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Eureka13
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12 Jan 2014, 9:00 am

By "successful" do you mean you have a second date lined up, or that you got laid? Or both?

leafplant
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12 Jan 2014, 9:07 am

Eureka13 wrote:

By "successful" do you mean you have a second date lined up, or that you got laid? Or both?

Maybe they just talked? That would be successful too, no?

The_Face_of_Boo
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12 Jan 2014, 9:08 am

buffinator wrote:

Yes, unless if the guys are bisexual.

Eureka13
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12 Jan 2014, 9:13 am

leafplant wrote:

Eureka13 wrote:

By "successful" do you mean you have a second date lined up, or that you got laid? Or both?

Maybe they just talked? That would be successful too, no?

That would certainly be successful in my book!

The wink was what made me wonder...

Dox47
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12 Jan 2014, 6:13 pm

Eureka13 wrote:

By "successful" do you mean you have a second date lined up, or that you got laid? Or both?

Both, though it's a third date that's lined up, the first was last Tuesday.

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aussiebloke
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12 Jan 2014, 6:32 pm

Dox47 wrote:

Eureka13 wrote:

By "successful" do you mean you have a second date lined up, or that you got laid? Or both?

Both, though it's a third date that's lined up, the first was last Tuesday.

good grief it only takes 3 dates to get laid where do I find these women

any around here :wink:

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