Why dating sites are BS

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She was exactly as I pictured her and i believe it went very well. Without going into a long speech I will say I broke all the rules: we talked about exes, politics and religion and I even shed a couple of tears when speaking of my late Grandfather. She told me it was refreshing to see someone so honest and genuine and I told her the same. Still, I did not talk about BDSM at all so I showed some "restraint" lol:

The biggest thing I found was that our conversation was EASY. I did not feel forced and I felt safe to show off who and I and what I am looking for and I made no apologizes for being who I am. I didn't even get nervous hugging her because I knew she would be open to it and even slow-to-warm-up me was almost ready to kiss her. She was very "plain" and naturally beautiful and that is exactly what I am attracted to the most but I reserved my compliments for her earrings only. We will see....

OK, well now I am officially surprised! But hey, people win the lottery, too. In fact, collectively, they win it all the time - but the chances of any individual winning it are still very low.

I think you (and, to a lesser extent, she) got very lucky with her messaging you so soon after signing up - before she learnt what to expect from online daters.

Yay, isn't it great to forget the "rules" and have the type of conversation you actually WANT to have? To actually get to know one another rather than just try to make a "good" impression? Discussing those controversial topics is the norm for me on a first date...if we don't, then I consider it a bad date.

I hope you get to see her again GHF

I gave up on dating sites, plus cell phones/texting is a huge turn off for me. Plus I learned these: You don't know who they could be hanging out with, talking to, the kind of activities they participated in, the kind of people they like to hang out with. I pretty much don't rush into anything either. I been on CM and Okcupid and didn't like either of those. I still look, but I don't count on anything to happen.

She did tell me she had been on a dating site before and I casually mentioned "girls I know have told me some interesting stories" and she mentioned how she only puts up a face shot and a short profile now while chuckling a bit. She did not elaborate but did mention how shallow and generic messages she got in the past were. Even us Aspies can read between the lines here In response I told her how in theory online dating should be great but in reality girls like her were very hard to find and her short profile actually said more than most of the utterly generic cookie cutter "hip" ones I usually see.

Certainly made for a much more enjoyable experience that is for sure. I even told her what my deal breakers were (tattoos, facial piercings, exotic hair colours) and was very upfront about what I have to offer. I even committed the cardinal sin and said I only want to date someone who has potential Wife material in the future. She also broke the "rules" by texting me her # as soon as she got a work break and said she "certainly" wants to get together again. Can't say there is any long term compatibility at this point but it was refreshing to have a real conversation with a real, down to earth person. I would imagine by choking up a bit and shedding those tears she *gasp* saw me as the great, caring guy I am rather than a "wuss". Just like when I couldn't find work, once I started breaking silly rules I started not only making major progress but actually looked forward to meeting people! What a concept!

lets be honest, online dating sites suck unless you're a white guy or an asian female! and if you're a black female?! forget it! many black men don't reply to most black womens profile! Those are the facts, theres been many studies that prove it. BTW I'm NOT a black woman, I'm just being real!

Not everyone will go to these kind of places to meet people (if they go at all). I've never seen anything remotely "social" in supermarkets. Also there are people who'd go to bars just to drink or churches just to worship.
Both where you are and what you are looking for can be factors in how good a dating site is. But even a poor "pool" can be better in relative terms.

dating sites are money making businesses, preying on desperate people, especially designed for the NT mindset...

Quite profitable business may I add...

Also its rubbish...

This can be an issue where being dishonest, in certain ways, is seen as "normal". So anyone who is brutally honest sticks out like the probverial "sore thumb".

I dont know how it is in other countrys, but in Sweden, dating sites sucks.

Almost everyone is a man, and many girls profile are just trolls.

Its very hard as a male to get a respond, so I tried to make a female account, and oh boy....100 messages in a week.

Interestingly I don't think I've ever seen any suggestion that women should pose as men of dating sites. Even though it's not uncommon for men who complain about them sucking to "try it as a woman"...

Of course. That's one reason I find dating sites a LOT easier to get dates from than anywhere else. Most people on a dating site are looking for dates. Handy!

Even free sites, like POF & OKCupid? How, exactly, do those exploit you for financial gain??

They tricks you with the ads, so tempting that you just HAVE to click! Or something...

My one gripe with dating sites is that I think they promote a "window-shopping" mentality. By that I mean that they give people the illusion of hundreds of potential matches in their immediate area, each one better than the next. This can make people treat dating more like shopping for a new car rather than a potential partner. ("I really like him/her and could see myself in a relationship with them, but oooo, this one has been to 20 countries and speaks fluent German!!"). I've even been guilty of this a handful of times, and I've seen the people I've dated do it also.

Once you really delve into it though, you start to realize that there aren't as many matches as it appears. When you cut out people you aren't attracted to, those with non-complimentary personalities or lifestyles, those who don't share your interests, those who are looking for different types of relationships, and those who are too far geographically...you're really left with an extremely small pool of people. That's true off-line as well, but off-line you don't really get the illusion of having hundreds of potential suitors lined up in a row.