Claims that a few "super hot men" are hogging all the women

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The other thing is, I don't think that anybody is hogging anyone. I think that women are losing interest in sex. I think that most people are losing interest in sex regardless of what their genders are.

I think this is mostly right. Looking at a country like Japan where everyone is freaking out about how little the younger generation dates and has sex.

Read that sentence again and imagine how hilarious it would've been in the 60s.

Unfortunately, by the time I saw your post yesterday, I was no longer able to make edits to the original post. Had I been able to do so, I could perhaps have clarified that you didn't make the EXACT claim in question, but that I was quoting you because you provided statistics that might be used in support of that claim and similar claims. In various forms and to varying degrees, such claims HAVE been voiced by quite a few men on Wrong Planet and elsewhere. My point was to provide an alternate explanation of the statistics.


My point was not to accuse you of "not taking ownership" of anything, and I'm sorry that my post made you feel that way. I actually agree with you that it's important to look at the larger social trends. The question is what those trends really are, and why.


My aim was not to attack what you said, in particular, but to respond to a general theme I've been hearing a lot lately. I will try to be clearer about this sort of thing in the future.

Sometime later I'll respond to some of the particulars of what you said above. For now my aim is just to apologize and clarify.

the elites are truly out of touch ! ! ! per usual

Last edited by oloolo7 on 23 Jun 2019, 2:32 pm, edited 1 time in total.

What do you mean?

Who are the elites?

Yeah I appreciate that and no harm done. Maybe in future you could either quote the stats themselves without quoting the member if the ideas you're critiquing aren't ones espoused by that member, or you could clarify that the idea you're criticritiquing is distinct from what that member said. I think a casual reader would be prone to link the ideas you're talking about to the member/s you're quoting is all

Please see my apology and clarifications here. I'll now respond to the substance of what you wrote.


Looking for statistics regarding dating apps, I found:

- 27 Online Dating Statistics & What They Mean for the Future of Dating (2018)
- 10 Online Dating Statistics You Should Know (2015)
- More Than 50% of People Who Use Tinder Do It Out of Boredom (2017)

It would appear that:

1) More men than women use dating apps. This in itself could account, to a large degree, for the shortage of women as perceived by men who use dating apps.
2) There is now a trend toward using dating apps to seek longterm relationships rather than hookups.
3) Among the relatively few women who use dating apps in the first place, proportionately fewer women than men use dating apps to seek hookups. Women are more likely than men to use dating apps to seek longterm relationships. But also, at the opposite extreme, women are much more likely than men to use dating apps just for entertainment, not actually seeking dates of any kind.


Perhaps, given that more men than women are looking for hookups. But I'm a little doubtful of the above, given that women tend not to prioritize looks as much as men do in the first place. Yes, it's also likely that those women who do hookups, in the first place, would prioritize looks more when seeking hookups than when seeking relationships. Still, even when seeking hookups, I would expect most women's top priority to be a feeling that the man is a safe person to be alone with.


By "better," do you mean "better-looking," or "better" in general? As I said, women tend not to prioritize looks as much as men do, and I would expect that many women would not prioritize looks as much in relationships as they would in hookups (assuming they do hookups in the first place, which many women do not). In relationships, a lot of other things become a lot more important.


Again, a lot here depends on what you mean by "better quality." I also dislike the whole idea that people can be rated on some single, linear, absolute scale of "quality," when there is lots of variation in terms of individual compatibility. Perhaps you could use another term like maybe "average desirability", i.e. desirability in terms of an average over everyone's desires?


I kinda see your point, but, ugh, the wording, describing people in terms of a single totally ordered scale of "value," like a slave market or something. It's downright dehumanizing, IMO.

Be that as it may, I think other issues discussed below are probably a much bigger factor in the shortage of women faced by some men.


Indeed that's probably a real problem for men who aren't college educated.


Really? Can you (or anyone else) provide statistics on this? That surprises me. After all, as far as I am aware, most college-educated women don't manage to find very high-paying jobs despite being college-educated, and they are less likely than male college grads to have majored in something with high earnings potential such as accounting or computer science.

But I think you're probably right that most women who are living independently prefer a man who is also living independently.

A few others just got locked that's why...

Well that does add an element of challenge

After moving out of home I stayed with friend and his GF back in my 20s who they used to fight like cats and dogs over the smallest thing. I was kind of used to that though and didn't particularly put me off. What did make me look for another rental opportunity was the somewhat audible grunting they made at night.

In the health sciences women outnumber men 7 to 3 in the workforce

The literature keeps supporting what boo, inquisitor and myself have been saying
https://www.independent.co.uk/life-styl ... 18886.html

Another oft quoted claim that "women aren't concerned about looks" as much as other things isn't supported by research, most research supports the assertion that the first filter women use in a prospective dating partner is looks!! ! after that they use some type of horrible linear scale on a man's cleanliness, personality, etc etc...

The above-linked article talks about women (primarily young women) being picky about men primarily in terms of education, NOT primarily in terms of looks, contrary to previous claims by you, Boo, and others, and contrary to what you say below:


Clarification: I never said that women don't care at all about looks, just that looks are not the main concern for many women. Looks may or may not be the "first filter" depending on the circumstances under which one is meeting the prospective dating partner.

Any many of the things women do care about are individually variable, e.g. personality; women do not all desire the exact same personality in their partners. And, for many, common interests and common values are important.

I'm afraid looks outweight personality for women;
https://www.livescience.com/58607-mens- ... ality.html

You can't fight biology Mona.

I've seen the study, but your conclusion is wrong. Women require a minimal level of attractivity, and when this is met, they will validate personality. The minimal level probably is dependent on her own attractivity, and so this might be a filter women have to create a manageable dating pool.

Question for you cyberdad! If one can't transcend one's biology then how do we have free will?