What NT Women Want

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I think a lot more people than just NTs are all too comfortable judging & generalizing each other. I'm vulnerable to that too & I wanted to point out that I don't think it's healthy to discuss over 10+ pages exactly how prejudiced everyone can be. Can we please run in the other direction?

When I was officially tested for Aspergers, it was ruled out in favor of Schizoid but the guy also agreed with my psychiatrist who refereed me to him that I also had Borderline. I was diagnosed with other stuff too when I was tested. I really don't get how Schizoid & Borderline can coexist but that's what the "expert" thought. I believe I tested poorly cuz of my dyslexia & other related learning disabilities, & my bad vision & difficulty processing things I do see(I forget what that face-blindness disorder is called). I was actually also told that I had Aspergers personality but it was due to Schizoid instead of anything on the autism spectrum. Guy was a quack & it prevented me from qualifying for services related specially to autism & developmental disabilities.
My 1st job was a dishwasher & I did that for 10 months. Some of the other dishwashers there were actually in their 30s & I was in my early 20s. I liked the job OK but I hated rush hour when things got busy. I'm open to doing it again if I work part time so I could still keep my benefits. Since Vermont has a higher minimum wage than federal, I would probably only be able to work like 20 hours a week which would be a lot better than the 30+ I did.

Well, in that case then we should not pass on our genes.

Many disabled people have fulfilling lives and some even have a positive impact on other people and inspire others who are not disabled find hope and meaning.

There are many members here who have happy, long -term relationships with NT's how about starting a positive thread with tips and explanations, personal experiences of how solutions were reached in certain difficult situations from those who have broken though this impasse, whos' hearts were attached to NT hearts, who were motivated through love (not self-interest) to crack each others code of communication and build a common language. It can't hurt. It is hard, I am struggling with this myself, but I refuse to believe it's impossible. Many of us are "battle weary" but giving up should be avoided at all costs, because we never know what new opportunities God/life will put before us each moment, and the alternative is unnacceptable.
Life has more depth and positivity than shallow dating sites and demoralizing social media, good people do exist and will bond with you. Don't let the stupid ones break your spirit.

We have such great people here with infinite wisdom to consult with, Kraftie, Bender, Blazingstar, Magz, Karamazov, Ann, Sharon and more..
These are the people who have hands-on experience learning NT social cues and communication and didn't give up. I accept that not everyone can do it but here is another suggestion to reap additional benefits from this forum, they have helped and encouraged me immensely. Just a thought. I expect poo poos from some of you but that's alright. Focus on the solution not the problem. That's my mantra when I feel defeated.


Boo how on earth could you think that intelligent, altruistic, honest genes such as yours are undesirable for humanity? That is a rhetorical question.

^ don’t leave yourself off that list, I find your “through the looking glass from the other side” perspective thought provoking and gently expressed whenever I run across it.

.........

And word in general: if you must focus on the problem, dissect it dispassionately. It was only when I dropped my self-pity and started appreciating women as friends that some of them found me attractive.

Focus on what’s good in your life, enjoy female company as simple company, and your charm and good nature will meet appreciation and love (might take a while, but patience is a virtue... and a necessity in marriage: from both parties).

I just wanted to highlight it.

But honestly - I'm tired of having my experience invalidated based on dating site statistics. I have nothing to do with dating site statistics, I never joined any and I don't care for them. If you want to meet interesting people of your type, don't go for the statistical average, rather do interesting things you like and meet others doing the same. Even if you fail to find romantic love, your life will be much more enjoyable.

I just don't want to pass them on.

Are you married or in relationship?

Btw, I was, less than two weeks ago.

This is literally the one most important thing, that elusive yet obvious "secret" - an odd foot needs an odd shoe as they say. Most autistics will not get along well with very mainstream people. Particularly if you want a good LTR you need someone out of the ordinary.

This is one of the best statements I have ever seen on this site. Single people of WP, read this carefully rather than the ridiculous "clickbait" articles you can read online. It ultimately didn't matter if 1%, 10% or 90% of people on dating sites liked me, all that matters is that 'extraordinary' people (in my case my wife) do.

My love of statistics caused me to grossly overthink and overanalyze what is a simple fact: I should have spent all that wasted time on just trying new enjoyable activities without worrying about 'dating statistics'. My wife was already eyeing me and was already planning to meet me at a meetup.com event before I even said one word to her on a dating site. What I wouldn't give to just go back in time, relax and enjoy the moment rather than worrying about potentially being a virgin at 30 or how I was statistically behind nearly everyone else. Besides if I can get and stay married anyone can do it.

This seems to be pretty much the universal opinion of happily married or paired up men here!

https://stepfeed.com/lebanon-is-the-2nd ... amily-7017

Anyone wanna still lecture me on passing on my genes?

Well, I'm a genetic dead-end, but I don't begrudge others the opportunity to breed.

Ditto.

Well, hence why I used the word “should”.

It’s just a friendly opinion/advice.

Anyway, the planet is too overpopulated and the state of world is horrible - breeding should really become a privilege , but that’s another topic.

@The_Face_of_Boo
Yes, I’m married.
6th anniversary this summer.

Didn’t think I’d have a hope in hell with her... until she made her move on me!

Break-ups are awful: I can remember being curled up in a corner howling when I left the girl I was with in my twenties... the dark horror that that relationship degenerated into notwithstanding.

Take care of yourself.