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Is looking for autistic women a realistic option?

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ironpony
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25 Feb 2022, 3:50 pm

Oh okay. I was told by a couple of I know that they feel I am hypersexual, which I didn't think of myself as, but maybe that is unusual for an autistic guy, but if I am, could women see that as attractive, if it means more testosterone?



auntblabby
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25 Feb 2022, 3:59 pm

ironpony wrote:
Oh okay. I was told by a couple of I know that they feel I am hypersexual, which I didn't think of myself as, but maybe that is unusual for an autistic guy, but if I am, could women see that as attractive, if it means more testosterone?

T levels seem to correspond with attractiveness in general, you see this in businessmen, rock stars, and in men in general in terms of people responding more to the high-t men.



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25 Feb 2022, 4:18 pm

Oh okay, that makes sense.

It was said before that the reason why autistic men do not go for autistic women, is because they are autistic, is seen as taking advantage. Is this really the main reason why they won't go for autistic women though?



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25 Feb 2022, 4:32 pm

ironpony wrote:
Oh okay, that makes sense. It was said before that the reason why autistic men do not go for autistic women, is because they are autistic, is seen as taking advantage. Is this really the main reason why they won't go for autistic women though?

the autistic women would not be the first choice for such men. alphas go for other alphas. but some men would not have compunctions about taking advantage of people.



ironpony
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25 Feb 2022, 4:36 pm

But what I don't understand is, why is it thought of by some as taking advantage, if both parties in the dating are autistic?



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25 Feb 2022, 4:38 pm

ironpony wrote:
But what I don't understand is, why is it thought of by some as taking advantage, if both parties in the dating are autistic?

because you can't have both parties at the same level, one has got to have social intelligence/skills to be able to approach and connect with the autistic woman, or man if the pursuer is a woman. for example, if i was to have any luck with anybody else, the other party would have to be socially smarter than i was. they would have to do all the work of establishing a connection/relationship as i would not have the knowledge to do that.



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25 Feb 2022, 4:41 pm

auntblabby wrote:
ironpony wrote:
Oh okay, that makes sense. It was said before that the reason why autistic men do not go for autistic women, is because they are autistic, is seen as taking advantage. Is this really the main reason why they won't go for autistic women though?

the autistic women would not be the first choice for such men. alphas go for other alphas. but some men would not have compunctions about taking advantage of people.


Two people can have different strengths and weaknesses and still overall be comparable. It's not as though one can't be somewhat less impacted in terms of social or communication skills and still more impacted in other categories.

The idea that one or the other must be 'taking advantage' is unfair to both parties unless there's strong evidence to suggest it, not just an assumption that no other explanation could exist.


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ironpony
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25 Feb 2022, 4:45 pm

auntblabby wrote:
ironpony wrote:
But what I don't understand is, why is it thought of by some as taking advantage, if both parties in the dating are autistic?

because you can't have both parties at the same level, one has got to have social intelligence/skills to be able to approach and connect with the autistic woman, or man if the pursuer is a woman. for example, if i was to have any luck with anybody else, the other party would have to be socially smarter than i was. they would have to do all the work of establishing a connection/relationship as i would not have the knowledge to do that.


Oh okay, but if both parties cannot be at the same level, then why is there an issue of being taken advantaged of, if both are not? If it's normal for one to be higher than the other, then why is the idea of taking advantage an issue, if both not being at the same level is normal?



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25 Feb 2022, 4:48 pm

ironpony wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
ironpony wrote:
But what I don't understand is, why is it thought of by some as taking advantage, if both parties in the dating are autistic?

because you can't have both parties at the same level, one has got to have social intelligence/skills to be able to approach and connect with the autistic woman, or man if the pursuer is a woman. for example, if i was to have any luck with anybody else, the other party would have to be socially smarter than i was. they would have to do all the work of establishing a connection/relationship as i would not have the knowledge to do that.


Oh okay, but if both parties cannot be at the same level, then why is there an issue of being taken advantaged of, if both are not? If it's normal for one to be higher than the other, then why is the idea of taking advantage an issue, if both not being at the same level is normal?

i can only go on my own experience, that i could easily have been taken advantage of because socially intelligent people know how to head-game those lacking social intelligence and i have been the victim of that.



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25 Feb 2022, 4:53 pm

Oh I am so sorry to hear that! I hope that doesn't continue to happen.

Do other guys have to worry about this when persuing autistic women, if it's the best option for them?



auntblabby
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25 Feb 2022, 5:00 pm

some men will take advantage ["players"] and some men with ethics and heart will tread carefully, and some will avoid.



ironpony
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25 Feb 2022, 5:04 pm

auntblabby wrote:
some men will take advantage ["players"] and some men with ethics and heart will tread carefully, and some will avoid.


That makes sense. In the case of the OP, as long as he has ethics, I guess persuing autistic women are nothing to worry about then?



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25 Feb 2022, 5:12 pm

ironpony wrote:
Can guys who are not goodlooking go for not goodlooking women though too? For example there is a woman I know who always talks about if she weren't so ugly looking that guys would want her. If there are women out there, who are like this, could guys who are not goodlooking go for them hopefully, and vice versa?


But think about that for second. Imagine being in a relationship where both parties would rather be with nearly anybody else but they both settled for each other because they knew they're too ugly to have a chance with anyone else and they know their partner feels the same way about them. Do you think anybody would be happy or have affection for their partner in such a pairing?



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25 Feb 2022, 5:18 pm

there are some that would make the best of it and put aside any further hopes or dreams.



ironpony
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25 Feb 2022, 5:36 pm

dorkseid wrote:
ironpony wrote:
Can guys who are not goodlooking go for not goodlooking women though too? For example there is a woman I know who always talks about if she weren't so ugly looking that guys would want her. If there are women out there, who are like this, could guys who are not goodlooking go for them hopefully, and vice versa?


But think about that for second. Imagine being in a relationship where both parties would rather be with nearly anybody else but they both settled for each other because they knew they're too ugly to have a chance with anyone else and they know their partner feels the same way about them. Do you think anybody would be happy or have affection for their partner in such a pairing?


But wouldn't there be some attraction in the pairing because they both know they have something in common. I mean it's seams like compromises have to be made, and not everything can be perfect in a relationship. Plus I see married couples, who are not goodlooking at all, and they have been in their marriages for a long time, so I think a lot of couples are not in it for the looks therefore?



Last edited by ironpony on 25 Feb 2022, 5:51 pm, edited 1 time in total.

auntblabby
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25 Feb 2022, 5:48 pm

i would be very happy to find somebody who looked like myself.