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How To Get A Girlfriend If You're An Autistic Man

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ProfessorJohn
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27 Jan 2023, 11:46 am

Self confidence is mentioned a lot in terms of success in dating. Attractive people are usually going to have higher self confidence because they have been treated better all of their life.



kraftiekortie
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27 Jan 2023, 12:05 pm

I wasn’t treated that great. I had the “Triad” (braces, glasses, fat). And I wore horn-rimmed glasses, too. And I used to wear too-small sweaters which exposed my belly, and I showered every couple of weeks. I was 13 years old when this was in the extreme—but I wasn’t much better in high school.

Yet, still, somehow, I knew I would be okay romance-wise….probably because I didn’t read the statistics.

Statistically, I should still a virgin at 62.



Last edited by kraftiekortie on 27 Jan 2023, 12:18 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Nades
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27 Jan 2023, 12:15 pm

ProfessorJohn wrote:
Self confidence is mentioned a lot in terms of success in dating. Attractive people are usually going to have higher self confidence because they have been treated better all of their life.


Brilliant comment. Previous rejection is often cited as a reason for low self-esteem.

Honestly, I think all autistics should work out and hit the gym hard. Autistics are dealt a crap hand in life when it comes to social skills, but many autistics have control of other facets of their life, including their bodies so they should double down on their looks.

I've mentioned previously in another thread that autistics usually look a bit.....chunky. I also said that there is no reason why they should look any uglier than NT's. It's a shame so many autistics who can look fantastic never make the most of it.

First appearances make a difference afterall. It's honestly such a shame to see so much obesety among the autistic community. We managed to cut an entire two decides off our average life expectancy which is an impressive (and shameful) "accomplishment"



IsabellaLinton
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27 Jan 2023, 12:33 pm

Caz72 wrote:
looks seem to be the case with me


I'm sorry to hear that.


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ironpony
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27 Jan 2023, 1:44 pm

Nades wrote:
ProfessorJohn wrote:
Self confidence is mentioned a lot in terms of success in dating. Attractive people are usually going to have higher self confidence because they have been treated better all of their life.


Brilliant comment. Previous rejection is often cited as a reason for low self-esteem.

Honestly, I think all autistics should work out and hit the gym hard. Autistics are dealt a crap hand in life when it comes to social skills, but many autistics have control of other facets of their life, including their bodies so they should double down on their looks.

I've mentioned previously in another thread that autistics usually look a bit.....chunky. I also said that there is no reason why they should look any uglier than NT's. It's a shame so many autistics who can look fantastic never make the most of it.

First appearances make a difference afterall. It's honestly such a shame to see so much obesety among the autistic community. We managed to cut an entire two decides off our average life expectancy which is an impressive (and shameful) "accomplishment"


That's good advice. Could one of the reasons a lot of autistic guys do not hit the gym is because a lot of women do not do it either so they figure, well if she is not going to do it to be more attractive, why should I?



kraftiekortie
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27 Jan 2023, 2:11 pm

^I don’t believe guys think that way—at least the guys I have known.

I never “hit the gym” to find love. I never cared if a woman “hit the gym.”



Nades
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27 Jan 2023, 3:20 pm

ironpony wrote:
Nades wrote:
ProfessorJohn wrote:
Self confidence is mentioned a lot in terms of success in dating. Attractive people are usually going to have higher self confidence because they have been treated better all of their life.


Brilliant comment. Previous rejection is often cited as a reason for low self-esteem.

Honestly, I think all autistics should work out and hit the gym hard. Autistics are dealt a crap hand in life when it comes to social skills, but many autistics have control of other facets of their life, including their bodies so they should double down on their looks.

I've mentioned previously in another thread that autistics usually look a bit.....chunky. I also said that there is no reason why they should look any uglier than NT's. It's a shame so many autistics who can look fantastic never make the most of it.

First appearances make a difference afterall. It's honestly such a shame to see so much obesety among the autistic community. We managed to cut an entire two decides off our average life expectancy which is an impressive (and shameful) "accomplishment"


That's good advice. Could one of the reasons a lot of autistic guys do not hit the gym is because a lot of women do not do it either so they figure, well if she is not going to do it to be more attractive, why should I?


I don't think so really. I think the level of pride an autistic takes in their appearance comes before they take an interest in serious dating. Obesity, and overall dishevelment probably comes prior to dating for a lot of autistics and seems to appear in childhood.

By the time they begin to date they have often already given up with their looks.

Honestly. An average life expectancy of just 60, which is on the low end of third world life expectancy really, really.......really shows on our looks.

We look minging to be honest, hence the general rule of death by 60. We literally eat ourselves to death.



ironpony
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27 Jan 2023, 3:31 pm

Nades wrote:
ironpony wrote:
Nades wrote:
ProfessorJohn wrote:
Self confidence is mentioned a lot in terms of success in dating. Attractive people are usually going to have higher self confidence because they have been treated better all of their life.


Brilliant comment. Previous rejection is often cited as a reason for low self-esteem.

Honestly, I think all autistics should work out and hit the gym hard. Autistics are dealt a crap hand in life when it comes to social skills, but many autistics have control of other facets of their life, including their bodies so they should double down on their looks.

I've mentioned previously in another thread that autistics usually look a bit.....chunky. I also said that there is no reason why they should look any uglier than NT's. It's a shame so many autistics who can look fantastic never make the most of it.

First appearances make a difference afterall. It's honestly such a shame to see so much obesety among the autistic community. We managed to cut an entire two decides off our average life expectancy which is an impressive (and shameful) "accomplishment"


That's good advice. Could one of the reasons a lot of autistic guys do not hit the gym is because a lot of women do not do it either so they figure, well if she is not going to do it to be more attractive, why should I?


I don't think so really. I think the level of pride an autistic takes in their appearance comes before they take an interest in serious dating. Obesity, and overall dishevelment probably comes prior to dating for a lot of autistics and seems to appear in childhood.

By the time they begin to date they have often already given up with their looks.

Honestly. An average life expectancy of just 60, which is on the low end of third world life expectancy really, really.......really shows on our looks.

We look minging to be honest, hence the general rule of death by 60. We literally eat ourselves to death.


Oh okay, but what causes them to give up on their looks in childhood? Since they haven't started dating yet, why give up so early in their minds, if that's the case?



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27 Jan 2023, 3:33 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
^I don’t believe guys think that way—at least the guys I have known.

I never “hit the gym” to find love. I never cared if a woman “hit the gym.”


But that's just you. While you've seemed to live a healthy life from your previous comments, this doesn't seem the case for *most* autistics it seems.

Lets keep in mind our dire life expectancy and the very limited pathways we can take to "achieve" it.

It's literally like 60 years.



Nades
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27 Jan 2023, 3:35 pm

ironpony wrote:
Nades wrote:
ironpony wrote:
Nades wrote:
ProfessorJohn wrote:
Self confidence is mentioned a lot in terms of success in dating. Attractive people are usually going to have higher self confidence because they have been treated better all of their life.


Brilliant comment. Previous rejection is often cited as a reason for low self-esteem.

Honestly, I think all autistics should work out and hit the gym hard. Autistics are dealt a crap hand in life when it comes to social skills, but many autistics have control of other facets of their life, including their bodies so they should double down on their looks.

I've mentioned previously in another thread that autistics usually look a bit.....chunky. I also said that there is no reason why they should look any uglier than NT's. It's a shame so many autistics who can look fantastic never make the most of it.

First appearances make a difference afterall. It's honestly such a shame to see so much obesety among the autistic community. We managed to cut an entire two decides off our average life expectancy which is an impressive (and shameful) "accomplishment"


That's good advice. Could one of the reasons a lot of autistic guys do not hit the gym is because a lot of women do not do it either so they figure, well if she is not going to do it to be more attractive, why should I?


I don't think so really. I think the level of pride an autistic takes in their appearance comes before they take an interest in serious dating. Obesity, and overall dishevelment probably comes prior to dating for a lot of autistics and seems to appear in childhood.

By the time they begin to date they have often already given up with their looks.

Honestly. An average life expectancy of just 60, which is on the low end of third world life expectancy really, really.......really shows on our looks.

We look minging to be honest, hence the general rule of death by 60. We literally eat ourselves to death.


Oh okay, but what causes them to give up on their looks in childhood? Since they haven't started dating yet, why give up so early in their minds, if that's the case?


Autism and not connecting to their peers as a result.

They just never learn the notions of what a desirable level of self care even is, yet alone take steps to achieve it.



Nades
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27 Jan 2023, 3:36 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
Caz72 wrote:
looks seem to be the case with me


I'm sorry to hear that.


Why? She probably looks looks good and takes care of herself.



old_comedywriter
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27 Jan 2023, 3:40 pm

And even worse, the "you have to have credit to get credit" financial statement applies here. While I was married, women would flirt with me. In fact, one sat on my lap right after my wedding! And now that my wife passed away, they've all disappeared. Same thing while I was single - no credit history, no credit.

Seems that women need a live real-time example of how you are with them to boost how attractive you appear to them.


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kraftiekortie
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27 Jan 2023, 3:43 pm

I feel like the “60” figure is erroneous. There are many over 60s here—including me.

Many autistic people are not obese, or even overweight.



IsabellaLinton
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27 Jan 2023, 3:44 pm

Nades wrote:
IsabellaLinton wrote:
Caz72 wrote:
looks seem to be the case with me


I'm sorry to hear that.


Why? She probably looks looks good and takes care of herself.


Lol and I don't? :?:

She's already discussed being manipulated and exploited by people for her looks.
She was horribly abused.
In my opinion it's a shame if that's still the main way she's judged by men.


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Muse933277
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27 Jan 2023, 3:47 pm

Nades wrote:

Lets keep in mind our dire life expectancy and the very limited pathways we can take to "achieve" it.

It's literally like 60 years.



I don't know if the life expectancy of 60 is entirely accurate.

You have to remember that before the 90s, autism was still seen as a lower functioning condition and if you were diagnosed back then, you most likely had it fairly significantly. So this likely skews the results a bit.


High functioning autism wasn't actively diagnosed until the 2000s, and people that grew up in the 00s are only in their twenties and thirties today. We're not going to see how high functioning autism impacts life expectancy until 50 years from now when the 2000s kids become seniors.



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27 Jan 2023, 3:48 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
Nades wrote:
IsabellaLinton wrote:
Caz72 wrote:
looks seem to be the case with me


I'm sorry to hear that.


Why? She probably looks looks good and takes care of herself.


Lol and I don't? :?:

She's already discussed being manipulated and exploited by people for her looks.
She was horribly abused.
In my opinion it's a shame if that's still the main way she's judged by men.


Why did you infer her short comment had negative connotations exactly? People get exploited whether they're good looking or not.



Last edited by Nades on 27 Jan 2023, 3:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.