The love hater

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I have thought about it, and I would prefer to get married than be lonely. There are many challenges of course. It would be essential that my wife understand Aspergers well.

why do people have to keep using the word hate?
i don't want to be alone, i am alone at present but i will surely find "friends" & companionship..

I dont understand what the issue is, if you prefer being alone, then be alone. I think it is correct to be alone if thats what you want.

My friend was saying to me about 'equally viable options' and I did not understand why he was saying that, but I think it was because he thought he 'ought' to want a relationship.

I find being in relationships quite difficult as Im naturally very solitary and dislike people (a lot) I find it hard to be around people at all. However celibacy got a bit 'tired' for me after several years and I really wanted some physical companionship.

Now I have a boyfriend Im still very ambivalent about closeness and being round someone but he is very understanding and is very easy to be around. I think he is someone who I could make it work with, rather than other people who make me nauseous lol.

I think its very hard to combine people phobia with relationships, but I shall give it a good try.

I think it is very much easier to be alone if one has a low sex drive, Ive been cursed with a high sex drive myself, which is very unfair if one does not like being round people. Older aspies have told me that it goes with age and that as they got older relationships and sex became less important to them.

Kenjuudo, as long as you're happy, I think that's good enough criteria. My test is always "Did you have fun?", so if that is fun for you and meets your needs, yeah, I don't see a relationship as being something missing in your life, nor do I think you would make a good relationship partner at this point. Better to keep everyone happy, including yourself, by not forcing yourself into one or making someone else miserable by being halfhearted in it. Truly your wiring is different than many people here, but that's not a bad thing, it just "is."

lotusblossom: No, I unfortunately have a rather high sex drive myself. But it's easily relieved.

billsmithglendale: Exactly.

~

Also, I should mention that I'm completely egocentric about this and I know it. But as long as nobody are affected by it, I'm in the clear.

I'm with you Kenjuudo. I just need a good housekeeper.

Maybe cause you've screwed up with stuff like that in the past, now you're trying to protect yourself.

Gah. I hope not. I've been blessed with a high sex drive and I hope it keep it that way for as long as possible.

what if your hubbie runs out of steam though, have you considered swinging?

Yeah, that's definately not me.

Maybe, maybe not. I did however not ask for the reasons why I feel like this. My own theory is that I've just figured out too much.

CelticGoddess: Sex is the least of my worries. Even if my drive is high, I can't stand the thought of having sex with someone i loathe, and I loathe everybody except my closest family.

no worries, that wasn't a job offer :p

if anyone wants to apply though, you know where to find my PM-box

I was responding to lotusblossom and her comment that other older aspies have told her that a high sex drive dissipates as you get older. That's a side of me that I don't care to lose.

But in regards to your comment, I couldn't have sex with someone I loathe either. Thankfully I can't think of anyone I loathe. Although I'm still not getting any sex.

Are you a virgin?

lol what does that have to do with anything?

I just thought that could be part of the housekeeping duties, someone experienced to take your cherry.

lol how did you get that out of what I wrote?