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Theory about a girl I know: Am I a stalker or not?

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SINsister
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04 Sep 2009, 5:51 pm

Erm...that's liable to get our OP a beatdown, or worse, I'd think...


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Shiggily
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04 Sep 2009, 10:25 pm

SINsister wrote:
Erm...that's liable to get our OP a beatdown, or worse, I'd think...


+1


touching a girl to see if she likes you? yeah, that really won't give you a creep reputation. (stroking someone you just met is more than a "little sleezy"

particularly if they are like me and don't like being touched. You are likely to get worse than slapped.


BTW what part of the body is the "tights"?


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jefe
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05 Sep 2009, 12:16 pm

Quite simply: you think too much and put too many marbles in one jar. Guess what? Most Aspies do the same.


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NinjaSquid
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05 Sep 2009, 1:02 pm

Yeah i you should not star to pet someone bluntly, but many people express closeness physical to each other, so if you really planning to get physicall with a member of the opposite sex you have to escalate touch. If you get in to physical contact with some body and he continues the physical contact with you its a sure sign of attraction.

And please remember that iam talking about an talking or social situation(kino,swimming) where you are nescesesarily close to each other like siting at the same table or the same couch. Dont for got sakes run across a room a start fodling people!

If you were siting with someone, you find attractive, in a bar and he stroking your arm, would you freak out? No you would let him continue even if this disturbs you hardly would do more than retract your arm or your self out of his reach. If you would do so once this could because of your dislike for touch generally or intially shock, if you're avoiding someone physically generally this might be because of a strong objection against physicall closeness or dislike for physical contact with this speciall person.

To me flirting a girl/boy is a kind of an algorythm
1.Find a girl/boy
you are attracted to the person (goto2)

Aint attracted (goto1)

2Do you like to get to

3. Do the person wants to talk with you? Yes/No

Yes okay lets talk(goto 4)

No, okay stoppit (goto1).

4. Do i can find a one or more common fields of interrest?

Yes, lets talk about that an hour in a normal social situation, 15 minutes or so in a club or bar than (goto5)

No (goto1)

5. check if the person is physical attracted to you by initiating light physical contact

The person returns physical contact (goto6)

the person rejects your contact (goto 4 counter +1)

the person rejects you (goto1)

6. escalade contact

the person plays along (goto7)

the person dont plays along (goto4 counter +1)

the person rejects you (goto1)

7 try to kiss her

If the persons kisses you too congratiulations

if not goto4 counter+1

if rejected as a person
asked for friendship (goto1 and maybe aquirre her cantact info)

if counter is (>4 goto1)



UberElvis
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05 Sep 2009, 6:33 pm

NinjaSquid wrote:
Checking to much on her online can make a creepy impression. The best way to avoid situation like these is to first aclimate to her friends and so or find some comon topic of interrest.

In a talking situation:
There are a little test i use to determine if a girl is sexually attracted, wich is by no way fool proof, but a good working solution. Touch her at soft body spots like under arms or hips or tights, stroke gentle like stroking a cat, may be let your hand lie there for a few seconds . If she ressists or shoves you away try again after 1 minute then after 30 minutes try again. As long as she smiles all is fine if she slaps you or her voice changes give up on her. Its kinda sleezy but it work.

Even normal people cant read each other perfectly esspecially when they are drunk so being at a party may give you a good excuse for a little to much forward momentum.


Umm...something tells me you completely misinterpreted my original post. There is no way I would be able to survive (literally) following this advice. After all I've done (phone calls, etc.) that would probably get me in jail with serious charges that would embarass me so much that I'm not even going to take the time to list what they potentially could be. I'm glad I know better then to follow this advice.

In response to everyone else, I'm just going to have to get over her and actually hope I don't see her again. If I do see her again (which is possible) I'm going to avoid her as much as possible so she gets the idea that I know that I did something wrong. If not, oh well. In the future, with other girls, I'll just be a lot slower about things.



NinjaSquid
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06 Sep 2009, 11:10 am

I thought you would wanted to get laid genericly.

And if you would got the advice right, you would know: if the girl is not attracted to you get a new target. Failure is a constant element of social relationships so get used to it, there are 6 billion people you cant hardly screw up with everybody.



UberElvis
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06 Sep 2009, 1:59 pm

NinjaSquid wrote:
I thought you would wanted to get laid genericly.

And if you would got the advice right, you would know: if the girl is not attracted to you get a new target. Failure is a constant element of social relationships so get used to it, there are 6 billion people you cant hardly screw up with everybody.


I'm not complaining at all about my failure, the whole purpose of this thread was to get some feedback on what I should do next and it so turns out that what I should do next is absolutely nothing.