22 Mar 2010, 7:19 pm
22 Mar 2010, 8:28 pm
22 Mar 2010, 9:01 pm
22 Mar 2010, 10:16 pm
Brianruns10 wrote:
Does anyone else feel this way? Like anyone you find attractive is therefore hopelessly out of your league?
There have been several women I've known, been attracted to, thought would have been worth knowing better, yet always they were out of my reach. Married or dating, or simply not interested. One even was dating a married man. I, an available person, wasn't good enough; she had to have someone who already had someone.
Another I knew was such a stunning person; amazing eyes that revealed an incredible soul that I would have loved to have known and loved. Yet, she was already married goddammit.
It drives me nuts! It feels like everyone is chosen already, and those who haven't won't have anything to do with me; they can find someone taller, more attractive, more successful financially.
It makes me angry, at the guys who're lucky enough to get such wonderful partners, at women who find me undesirable and invalid as a lover, and at myself for being an ugly, unappealing, unlovable person. I feel like I lack in all the aspects that matter to a partner, and all my strengths and positives aren't worth a damn to anyone. So where I'm then? An un-person?
I sometimes wish I had full blown autism, so I wouldn't have to know what I'm missing, wouldn't be daily tortured by beauty all around me that I completely lack, and can never attain. I sometimes lust for mental oblivion.
There have been several women I've known, been attracted to, thought would have been worth knowing better, yet always they were out of my reach. Married or dating, or simply not interested. One even was dating a married man. I, an available person, wasn't good enough; she had to have someone who already had someone.
Another I knew was such a stunning person; amazing eyes that revealed an incredible soul that I would have loved to have known and loved. Yet, she was already married goddammit.
It drives me nuts! It feels like everyone is chosen already, and those who haven't won't have anything to do with me; they can find someone taller, more attractive, more successful financially.
It makes me angry, at the guys who're lucky enough to get such wonderful partners, at women who find me undesirable and invalid as a lover, and at myself for being an ugly, unappealing, unlovable person. I feel like I lack in all the aspects that matter to a partner, and all my strengths and positives aren't worth a damn to anyone. So where I'm then? An un-person?
I sometimes wish I had full blown autism, so I wouldn't have to know what I'm missing, wouldn't be daily tortured by beauty all around me that I completely lack, and can never attain. I sometimes lust for mental oblivion.
You are putting relationships on a pedestal.
Stop that!
It does you no good.
You have plenty of options. Dive into what you really enjoy and focus on your work and career. Everything else falls into place later on.
