Board index › Coping in life › Love and Dating

Ready to give up

Page 2 of 2 [ 21 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2

Previous topic | Next topic

Sound
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Oct 2009
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 746
Location: Seattle

24 Mar 2010, 10:38 pm

You're right. I overstated in a big way.

I guess it just gets to me, because I see friends and family do this, move in with a bf/gf after only a little bit of time, like 6 months or something, and then (of course) everything starts going downhill.



HopeGrows
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Nov 2009
Age: 52
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,565
Location: In exactly the right place at exactly the right time.

24 Mar 2010, 10:52 pm

@Sound, I agree with the spirit of your advice....that one line of thought kinda got my attention, though. :wink: I'm not a fan of living together, whether you've known each other a short time or a lot longer - it's just not my thing.


_________________
What you feel is what you are and what you are is beautiful...


Sound
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Oct 2009
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 746
Location: Seattle

24 Mar 2010, 11:06 pm

When financial matters are such a huge issue in marriages, the largest source of stress(apparently), then introducing financial matters into a non-marital relationship is like...
You know what, I'm gonna resist my usual urge to make analogies, and just say it's bad!



WoundedDog
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 24 Feb 2010
Age: 46
Gender: Male
Posts: 122
Location: New York City

24 Mar 2010, 11:35 pm

TheHaywire wrote:
My SSI money goes to rent for both of us. 1K a month. I also make a small amount of money through creative channels. Currently I am in severe debt though.

I'm sick of his empty promises about money. If he would have told me he couldn't guarantee the money he promised us it wouldn't have been an issue. I would have just had him do more work for me. I'd be fine hiring him 24/7 if that's what needs to happen. What I'm not fine with is the "I'll have the money in two weeks" lies that he blames on bad luck.

Since I believed he'd have the money in two weeks I felt free to spend a little extra. Now I'm risking eviction.


Sounds like you two are codependent, which is actually a very bad spot to be in. You're starting to see a pattern of empty promises emerge and I can tell you with some confidence that the pattern will likely continue.



Aspiewifey
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 15 Mar 2010
Age: 45
Gender: Female
Posts: 64

25 Mar 2010, 2:34 am

TheHaywire wrote:

I need my lover to be my personal assistant because I don't know my left from right.


Am I really the only person who finds this statement troubling? How CAN your lover get a full time job and contribute to the bank account if he's being your personal assistant? I mean, if we think of a romantic relationship as a partnership, each partner has to contribute something. From the way you've described this, it sounds like he provides a personal assistant and you provide a paycheck.