"Heartless b*****s"(includes words of advice)

Page 2 of 7 [ 109 posts ] Go to page Previous 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 ... 7 Next

Previous topic | Next topic

Wolfheart
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 17 Feb 2011
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,971
Location: Kent, England

12 Oct 2011, 11:06 am

Seventh wrote:

A male friend of mine was really confident around me when I was young, insecure and neurotic. He gave me a lot of help and support. Now, ten years later, I'm much more grown up and confident, and it seems to intimidate him. Which is annoying.

He probably saw your incapability or lack of security as a way to have a position of power to dictate what he thought was best for you or in other words, he enjoyed that you were dependent on him.

MXH
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 28 Jul 2010
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 13,057
Location: Here i stand and face the rain

12 Oct 2011, 11:15 am

i check off everything onn that list

TheygoMew
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 3 Nov 2010
Age: 47
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,102

12 Oct 2011, 11:26 am

I like guys that are really nice and not just putting on an act. I think it's wrong that people in general shun the nice guy because alot of people that stereotype have decided to put all nice men into one box.

Women that are b*****s generally like the bad boys the most and as a result all women get shoved into the b***h category as well.

Crow_T_Robot
Raven
Raven

Joined: 12 Sep 2011
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 106
Location: On-board the SOL

12 Oct 2011, 11:50 am

TheygoMew wrote:

Yeah, my first thought when reading the article was: "So there are no real nice guys, only creepy, insecure guys who pretend to be nice and then dress as their mother and kill you?" I understand the distinction between nice guys and "nice" guys (the "nice" was in massive sarcasm quotes), but it's sad that you can't be nice to some people without them assuming that you have an ulterior motive.

_________________
There's a party in my head
And no one is invited

MountZion
Deinonychus

Joined: 12 Jan 2009
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 397
Location: London

12 Oct 2011, 11:56 am

Read this article a while back, it's funny and has a hint of truth to it. It is not saying that you cannot be nice, but what it is saying is that there is nice and then there is sycophantic, which is not a good trait at all.

_________________
The Artistry

Wolfheart
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 17 Feb 2011
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,971
Location: Kent, England

12 Oct 2011, 12:00 pm

Crow_T_Robot wrote:

but it's sad that you can't be nice to some people without them assuming that you have an ulterior motive.

I agree in some cases, it's silly. For instance, a guy holding a door open for a woman out of common human courtesy can be seen as patronizing and sexist.

b9
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 14 Aug 2008
Age: 54
Gender: Male
Posts: 12,003
Location: australia

12 Oct 2011, 12:08 pm

i only read the first sentence, and i fell off your train of thought, and i then thought that "heartless b*****s" are really female dogs that have no heart (therefore dead).

why would someone waste time worrying about things that can not be changed?

Crow_T_Robot
Raven
Raven

Joined: 12 Sep 2011
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 106
Location: On-board the SOL

12 Oct 2011, 12:09 pm

Wolfheart wrote:

Crow_T_Robot wrote:

but it's sad that you can't be nice to some people without them assuming that you have an ulterior motive.

I agree in some cases, it's silly. For instance, a guy holding a door open for a woman out of common human courtesy can be seen as patronizing and sexist.

If someone is immediately behind me when I open a door, I generally let them go through first, regardless of gender. Once, I did this for a couple of women, and as they walked through the door one commented to the other that "He held the door for us!" and they both started laughing. It really annoyed me at the time.

_________________
There's a party in my head
And no one is invited

Wolfheart
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 17 Feb 2011
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,971
Location: Kent, England

12 Oct 2011, 12:32 pm

Crow_T_Robot wrote:

Once, I did this for a couple of women, and as they walked through the door one commented to the other that "He held the door for us!" and they both started laughing. It really annoyed me at the time.

Exactly, it's done out of common courtesy regardless of a gender. It's wrong for anyone to assume that every act of kindness and common courtesy somehow holds an ulterior motive.

Lilya
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 17 Mar 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,600
Location: Finland

12 Oct 2011, 12:44 pm

I only date gentlemen. I fail to understand this kind of threads.

_________________
It's not the sinful, but the stupid who are our shame - Oscar Wilde

MountZion
Deinonychus

Joined: 12 Jan 2009
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 397
Location: London

12 Oct 2011, 1:03 pm

Lilya wrote:

I only date gentlemen. I fail to understand this kind of threads.

Different women respond to different things. We often fail to grasp this whenever we make our sweeping generalisations :oops:

. It would appear though that being too nice and supplicating can make one appear weak, insecure and unconfident, which are 3 particularly unattractive traits.

If one can maintain your gentlemanly behaviour with other attractive traits, then one would be the perfect gentleman.

_________________
The Artistry

DialAForAwesome
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Oct 2011
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,189
Location: That place with the thing

12 Oct 2011, 1:14 pm

I don't myself a nice guy, but rather a good guy. I have flaws like anyone else, but I also have good traits.

I will say this, though, it does suck to do nice things genuinely and have people of EITHER gender misunderstand you.

_________________
I don't trust anyone because I'm cynical.
I'm cynical because I don't trust anyone.

IDontGetIt
Velociraptor

Joined: 12 Apr 2011
Age: 59
Gender: Male
Posts: 499
Location: Cheshire, UK.

12 Oct 2011, 1:19 pm

That article? What a pile of steaming crap. There is a world of difference between "nice" and " insecure", unless it's just some typical NT misdefinition of words. Treat a woman decently and that makes you insecure? Bull. If you want to see insecurity, just look at any "alpha" male, desperate for attention and approval, full of self loathing and absolutely no concept of their place in the world.

spongy
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 17 Jul 2010
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,055
Location: Patiently waiting for the seventh wave

12 Oct 2011, 1:21 pm

Lilya wrote:

I only date gentlemen. I fail to understand this kind of threads.

This thread is an attempt to explain the misconception about females only wanting to date bad guys(it gives reasons why some females avoid certain traits that should be seen as good...)having said that if you dont wish to participate on this discussion you are more than free to do so.

_________________
Please take the time to answer this quick survey to help improve the community

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt255139.html

Fullofstars
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 11 Sep 2011
Age: 43
Gender: Female
Posts: 545

12 Oct 2011, 1:42 pm

riley wrote:

Women don't like deception.. they don't like men pretending they are nice so I don't think they'd like men pretending to "neurotypical" either.. that and I doubt someone with aspergers could fake not having it.

^^^ Applause!^^^

spongy
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 17 Jul 2010
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,055
Location: Patiently waiting for the seventh wave

12 Oct 2011, 1:50 pm

Fullofstars wrote:

riley wrote:

^^^ Applause!^^^

From her posts she seems to be quite an intelligent female.

_________________
Please take the time to answer this quick survey to help improve the community

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt255139.html

Page 2 of 7 [ 109 posts ] Go to page Previous 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 ... 7 Next

Jump to:

"Heartless b*****s"(includes words of advice) Post Reply New Topic

"Heartless b*****s"(includes words of advice)