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Roman
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Joined: 17 Mar 2005
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29 Feb 2012, 5:25 pm

Wolfheart wrote:
Boxman108 wrote:
I've told others I've just wanted to get to know them as friends, since to me actually dating or being in a relationship should be a commitment to a person you feel you already know well. But I guess I'm in the minority here.


Most friendships simply stay friendships and most relationships are started from the get go so two people can go from being casually known or strangers to having an intimate relationship.

There are people that do like to engage in friendship and a mutual understanding to take it slow but in most scenarios, that is unlikely.


Yeah, and this is one HUGE thing I have problem with ever since I learned about it. I mean intuitively it seems a lot more logical that friendship should help relationship, not hinder it. So it almost makes me feel that there is a ''rule'' that says ''either/or but not both'' and people are ''hardwired'' to follow the rule, no matter how illogical or counterintuitive it might be. But why follow that nonsensical rule? Why not instead follow the heart and date a good friend, since thats where the heart would lead?



C1890
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29 Feb 2012, 11:36 pm

Hi Roman,
Well, you had asked what happened. We did hang out as friends for a very long time and talked about going out. He started holding my hand and giving me romantic like hugs all the time so I thought we were going in that direction. Then all of a sudden he changed his mind and just wants to be friends. He thought I was going to move away or something but I have never said I would and nothing has changed with that since the very begging. He still wanted to hug me like that after he said he just wanted to be friends only. I have distanced my self quite a bit. I can tell he does not like the fact that I dont hug him like that but as Wolfheart said "You cant have the milk if you don't buy the cow." :)