26 Oct 2011, 6:46 am
26 Oct 2011, 7:20 am
Fullofstars wrote:
...and speaking of not making myself clear 
what I was wondering in the first place was if aspie guys are willing/able to be with NT women. It seems like many of the guys here would prefer someone very much like themselves. I have my introverted traits, and I hate meaning chatter and insincere gestures of affection, so in those ways I'm pretty well suited for the guy I'm interested in. But in so many other ways, I feel oblivious, and I wonder how much of that he's going to be able to deal with before it seems overwhelming and not worth the effort?
what I was wondering in the first place was if aspie guys are willing/able to be with NT women. It seems like many of the guys here would prefer someone very much like themselves. I have my introverted traits, and I hate meaning chatter and insincere gestures of affection, so in those ways I'm pretty well suited for the guy I'm interested in. But in so many other ways, I feel oblivious, and I wonder how much of that he's going to be able to deal with before it seems overwhelming and not worth the effort?I'm in a relationship with a very outgoing NT, and have the exact same insecurities. He probably does too. I think what a lot of the aspie guys here really want (anyone, please correct me if I'm wrong) is someone who will try to understand them and not try to change them, and they see that as being possible only with another aspie.
I think that, as long as you're willing to try to understand him, to meet him halfway when your wants conflict (unlike most NTs who feel that because everyone else does things their way, we must too), and as long as he is willing to do the same things, you'll be okay.
As for you having a kid (I hope I don't insult anyone right now), but women seem to mature and mellow out a lot once they have a child. This is appealing. But a lot of guys are afraid of the extra commitment dating a mother would entail.
And I'm happy that you went for it, and happier that things seem to be going well.
