Have you ever dated a psychopath/narcissist?

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Possibly it's denial out of fear rather than just being stupid. I'm sure most people choose to be ignorant. It's really hard to believe that people just don't see it.

I was married to a N/Psy Monster is all I can say and I don't like offending people but monster says it all

What is a narcissist? like what is the criteria? I've been accused of being one on other forums when I talked about my problems & being lonely & my 1st girlfriend was kind of like that too so I have dated one if a narcissist is someone who ask for advice a lot & loves to b!tch how his/her life sux

@ Nick people that are narcs are mean they can't love not even family members they only use people they are truly evil people seem to misdiagnose espies for narcissists all the time NOT the same at all trust me. You are not one

We don't have telepathy. We are known as Aspies, not espies.

I have dated neither.

Here are the symptoms of NPD:

http://health.yahoo.net/channel/narciss ... r_symptoms


A person with narcissistic personality disorder:

Reacts to criticism with rage, shame, or humiliation
Takes advantage of other people to achieve his or her own goals
Has feelings of self-importance
Exaggerates achievements and talents
Is preoccupied with fantasies of success, power, beauty, intelligence, or ideal love
Has unreasonable expectations of favorable treatment
Requires constant attention and admiration
Disregards the feelings of others, lacks empathy
Has obsessive self-interest
Pursues mainly selfish goals


Criteria:
http://www.mental-health-today.com/narcissistic/dsm.htm

A pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behavior), need for admiration, and lack of empathy, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:

(1) has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements)

(2) is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love

(3) believes that he or she is "special" and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)

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(4) requires excessive admiration

(5) has a sense of entitlement, i.e., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations

(6) is interpersonally exploitative, i.e., takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends

(7) lacks empathy: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others

(8) is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her

(9) shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes

This will help also


Misdiagnosing Narcissism - Asperger's Disorder

By: Dr. Sam Vaknin

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(The use of gender pronouns in this article reflects the clinical facts: most narcissists and most Asperger's patients are male.)

Asperger's Disorder is often misdiagnosed as Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), though evident as early as age 3 (while pathological narcissism cannot be safely diagnosed prior to early adolescence).

In both cases, the patient is self-centered and engrossed in a narrow range of interests and activities. Social and occupational interactions are severely hampered and conversational skills (the give and take of verbal intercourse) are primitive. The Asperger's patient body language - eye to eye gaze, body posture, facial expressions - is constricted and artificial, akin to the narcissist's. Nonverbal cues are virtually absent and their interpretation in others lacking.

Yet, the gulf between Asperger's and pathological narcissism is vast.

The narcissist switches between social agility and social impairment voluntarily. His social dysfunctioning is the outcome of conscious haughtiness and the reluctance to invest scarce mental energy in cultivating relationships with inferior and unworthy others. When confronted with potential Sources of Narcissistic Supply, however, the narcissist easily regains his social skills, his charm, and his gregariousness.

Many narcissists reach the highest rungs of their community, church, firm, or voluntary organization. Most of the time, they function flawlessly - though the inevitable blowups and the grating extortion of Narcissistic Supply usually put an end to the narcissist's career and social liaisons.

The Asperger's patient often wants to be accepted socially, to have friends, to marry, to be sexually active, and to sire offspring. He just doesn't have a clue how to go about it. His affect is limited. His initiative - for instance, to share his experiences with nearest and dearest or to engage in foreplay - is thwarted. His ability to divulge his emotions stilted. He is incapable or reciprocating and is largely unaware of the wishes, needs, and feelings of his interlocutors or counterparties.

Inevitably, Asperger's patients are perceived by others to be cold, eccentric, insensitive, indifferent, repulsive, exploitative or emotionally-absent. To avoid the pain of rejection, they confine themselves to solitary activities - but, unlike the schizoid, not by choice. They limit their world to a single topic, hobby, or person and dive in with the greatest, all-consuming intensity, excluding all other matters and everyone else. It is a form of hurt-control and pain regulation.

Thus, while the narcissist avoids pain by excluding, devaluing, and discarding others - the Asperger's patient achieves the same result by withdrawing and by passionately incorporating in his universe only one or two people and one or two subjects of interest. Both narcissists and Asperger's patients are prone to react with depression to perceived slights and injuries - but Asperger's patients are far more at risk of self-harm and suicide.

The use of language is another differentiating factor.

The narcissist is a skilled communicator. He uses language as an instrument to obtain Narcissistic Supply or as a weapon to obliterate his "enemies" and discarded sources with. Cerebral narcissists derive Narcissistic Supply from the consummate use they make of their innate verbosity.

^^ I am sorry you are in pain if you would like to talk about it we can

Wow, that sounds exactly like my sister. All of the symptoms.

wonderwomen2012 and League_Girl, thank you for that background information. i can definitely see how some aspies may come across as narcissistic, because the behaviours can seem a bit similar. very interesting.

also, wonderwomen2012: Tallyman was just correcting your use of the word "espies". we are not called "espies". we are called "aspies" as the word is sort for "ASPerger's syndrome", not "ESPerger's syndrome".

Last edited by hyperlexian on 14 Jan 2012, 3:44 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Exactly. No offence intended to wonderwomen2012. It helps if she uses the correct terminology rather than 'A', 'S' or 'espies'. Everyone stands a better chance of knowing what she is talking about then, rather than having to play guessing games.

ESPies would be psychic aspies right?

Correct.

At least she didn't say Ass-burgers. Anyone using that gets an instant ban!

Going to ban yourself now?

I thought espie was just an innocent typo. Sometimes I type the wrong letter when I type a word.

Are you joking?