To Hell with it All!

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yeah, but when in Rome .....

If you want to play in an NT world, you have to play the game. Its not like Vietnam, there are rules.

NT's and their stupid rituals. All of them deserve to die.

I feel the same way but a part of me keeps me from doing so.NT's and their ways...

You need to develop an internal locus of control.

OK, Topher, and others, I'm not saying 'change into a NT so NT girls will love you', I'm saying take the rough edges off. What I'd hoped to express through my example was that there are certain things ASpie males can do to appear more attractive to NT females.
A good freind is an undiagnosed ASpie male. He dresses in baggy comfortable clothing, doesn't get haircuts very often, and can tell you anything about Motown artists, and their records. He's a great record collector/seller, but not much of a ladies man. If he changed certain aspects of the way he presents himself, but not giving up the record obsession, he'd have a better chance.
I'd never tell one of our crowd to act NT to get along. I can't stand NT males.

That's what I say. I've blown every chance of ever having a partner.
I get very angry at myself for doing than.

I've kind of given up on looking for an NT girl, the poor understand has given me grief before. Im wondering if an AS girl might be the safest and happier option, because there that mutural acceptance and understanding beforehand. Less worry about trying to make an impression.

Why should I have to change? If they don't like me for me, then I shouldn't like them. It's like I always say, If you be someone else, you will lose yourself in the process.

Me too.

My biggest problem? I tend to fall for totally the wrong people - it's like I can smell the scent of unsuitability on them, as if it's some kind of aphrodisiac. Which is then completely counter-acted by the fact that I haven't a clue how to go about fulfilling what it's telling me to do.

Personally, I'm a little tired of it...

I'm 28. I found out about AS twelve years ago, when I was 16 but suspected that something was up pretty much all my life, and identified with certain aspects of autism since I first read about it in a book. (And I was 13.)

Dating sucks because I never quite figure out what to do, and because I think men shy away from me. They say that men cannot relate to women's emotional issues, but I sometimes feel that I cannot be emotionally attached and this scares them away because this is not what they expect from a woman.

I also have issues with touch, and "being intimate" sometimes feels like I'm just going through the motions. Okay... so this is going to sound bad. Maybe I wouldn't care except that I really want to get into a partnership and have babies. And I don't want to change, because if I do it will always feel like the person opposite me is living with someone who is not me. I don't think they would like that either.

I would never want to change for someone else either. I try to look for a woman with similar interests. But the fact that I am (a) specifically looking for another aspie, (b) am a full-time college student, and (c) about to move from Texas to Idaho in a couple of months, is the real obstacle for me.

Tim

Thanks, Ping-Machine ! ! I've been wondering what it's like for the ladies with AS. NT guys think you're SUPPOSED to be good at relationships because you're female(! !) What with the ratio on this site, we hear a lot from guys about how difficult it is to date and find someone, so it's good to hear from one of the ladies. The physical affection thing is difficult for guys, too. I had NT women totally flip from being interested to being convinced I'm a FAG. Just because I didn't jump into bed with them, sometimes on the first date. Well, excuuuuse me for not being a total "LUV MACHINE", like the NT boys. Also the "I'm sending you clues" rituals went right past me, so I'm sure some thought I was a bit of a ret*d, or something. But, you know what ?? I kept stepping up to the plate, time after time, even though I knew I was going to get hit with the ball. (OUCH ! !! !)

I rather look for unique girls, who have their own personality and mind, are pretty intelligent, and have a mutual understanding with me. I've never really felt attracted to the emotional and bubbly types, but the girls who are more solid, intact and mature. The "hot chicks" are in reality mostly flirty, common and much more likely to go for popular guys. I don't consider going out with a superficial fashion statement, but a girl with intelligence, maturity, and interesting personality.

I think anyone who seriously says that MUST be clinically ret*d.

I couldn't agree with you both more...

>>NT's and their stupid rituals. All of them deserve to die.<<

No, they don't. People with that kind of attitude need some serious help. You need to talk to someone Markendust, you're only getting yourself down.