Parents don't believe in dating.

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Yes they are concerned that I am going to get her pregnant. Which is not my intent at all. Actually in my aspergers group (which is where I met her) we were talking about how husbands can get away with being gone a lot from home and not helping out but wives can't if they have kids... (I don't personally believe in that sexist way of thinking. I would help out a lot more than a lot of guys do.) and she mentioned that maybe she shouldn't get married and have kids then... Which kinda brought me down because that's the type of relationship I'm looking for. To find the girl I want to marry. But at the same time kids stress me out quite a bit (I have 3 younger siblings who are 7, 4, and 2 so I have quite a bit of experience with kids) do I don't think I'd be a good father anyways. Maybe I would... But I think it would just bring out a bad side in me and make me act just like my dad who is a controlling dick.

so its not they dont believe in dating, its they dont want you to date?

They don't believe in dating. But believe in courting. Which I wouldn't mind but I have a hard time with getting personal with a girl when there is someone there babysitting me. Plus as the relationship progresses there will be conversations that really should only be between a couple. So yes they would let her come over as long as they are around but I don't like it. Plus my house is really loud with 7 people in it especially when there is a new person and my little siblings are all over them and since she has AS and I know for a fact that she doesn't like loud crowded situations that it would cause nothing but stress and anxiety for her (and me as well since I hate seeing people I care about in discomfort). Overall I just wish they trusted me enough to let me do my own thing... I feel like when I do things my way it works out... And as soon as other people jump in it becomes a train wreck. I'm worried that these issues with my parents would drive her away and I don't want that... I fear I may never find anyone and I don't want to die alone... I want a meaningful relationship with a woman of my choosing (and her choosing me as well) that's all. Plain and simple.

you are old enough to make your own decisions about who you like, and what to do with this person. i say do what most 19 year old kids do: tell their parents they will be with a friend, then go hang out with your girl instead. that, or you can sit them both down, assure them that you understand their concerns, and let them know that they are being very controlling, and unreasonable because you are 19 years old, well old enough to have a girlfriend and go on dates without them present. let them know you dont want to have sex just yet, you want to wait.

another alternative is having them agree to go to a place you would know they would end up regretting being at. like, if you just go to hang out with her at her place, whats your parents going to do? follow you there and just durdle around in someone elses house for the duration of your stay? i dont think a lot of people would appreciate their daughter's boyfriends parents just chilling around their place. they might also help you out by saying that its unreasonable to your parents, but i dont know what they are like.

Ummmm.... Yeah... They probably would be opposed to it and I'm definitely opposed to that idea. No offense to anyone who is homosexual. That's just not my cup of tea so to speak. I think that aside from the depression that's caused by my anxiety and that they feel that the relationship questions with this girl are the issue that they are getting better with me making my own decisions.

they don't need to know if you date someone.