Why Relationships Don't Last.

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In some cases that does seem true, people sometimes do want a slave. Personally I just want to make someone happy with providing them with friendship, love, dedication, romance, and even the occasional gift. I don't want a slave, I want an equal half. I'll cook and clean half of the time too.

I did join this site to find people who are like me. I feel I conflict with most "normal" people with my ways of thinking. I examine every angle and attempt to have a perception from more than one side of an issue.

Some people love differently, some people don't love at all. Some people want sex, others just want to see the world burn.

To me, if someone is willing to give you their heart and soul, they are worth the effort to keep. Unless you can clone yourself and make the clone your preferred gender and it would have all the same traits as yourself but still be attracted to them, no one will ever have a perfect match. Bouncing from one person to the other seems pointless. You're only going to find a stupid reason to leave each person. For example, man hands, or bad sex or even if they are just a little clingy.

"good enough for me" is a dead term now.

I got a flat screen HD television 5 years ago, and it's now on the fritz.
BF and I think it might be overheating, because the garbled imagery goes away once it's turned off for a few minutes.
We were discussing where to take it to have it fixed, and mused about the possibility of it being difficult to find an actual TV repairman, which used to be a well-known profession.
It seems like it'd be easy to fix, if we just identified the problem. We could do it ourselves, even, if we had the tools.

Dunno why, but this thread reminded me of it...no one FIXES things anymore. They don't invest.
It's all expendable.

Nothing wrong with making investments. People treat lovers like used electronics, once its been a while, they get "old" and aren't worth much anymore.

Like how electronics rapidly depreciate in value from the moment you buy it.

People value human bonds the wrong way. Valuing something means appreciating it, not literally evaluating its worth.

I've gone from a 15" PC monitor to a 19", then to a 17" with a better screen, then to a 19" widescreen, then to a 22" widescreen, and now I'm at a 27" widescreen. I'm happy with it and I don't wish to upgrade any further. It took a while to find one I'm satisfied with though. I am a techie but I don't apply the upgrades with people.

Most of the trouble I have is with communicating and saying the right things, instead I blurt out what I think is the truth regardless if it might hurt them or not. Honesty + lack of communication skills = bad.

I normally hide from strangers, the people I know and care about I try to be as open with them as possible, even if its awkward.

I'm not really sure what to tell you about coming off as an a**hole. I do know its hard to filter what I say, all I really want to do is say how I feel. Sometimes in the heat of the moment its possible to blurt out something incredibly stupid.

Maybe because divorce and fornication aren't so taboo anymore.

Not necessarily, but the media does cry sex in almost everything. Its all about sex appeal. Divorce becoming less taboo mainly just freed a lot of women from the grasps of abuse.

Main reason divorce exists today is because 1. people don't try to make it work, and 2. sometimes people aren't right for each other. Some people rush into marriage, thinking they can clamp someone down to them. It doesn't work that way. Marriage exists for two people who love each other and are both willing to go the extra mile for each other. It doesn't have to be perfect, but you have to share a lot of common ground.

Most people don't even know who they are these days. Or what they want.

I do think its very important to have a lot of common values and ways of thinking. Some people want to be with their total opposites. Opposites may attract, but don't always work out. Doesn't mean its necessarily impossible though. It takes a lot of understanding and work. More than that of dating someone more like yourself.

It seems the general consensus is that people would rather give up and seek instant gratification, like the "thrill" you mentioned.

I don't really get it, I don't find it thrilling to meet new people, especially when they could try to hurt me. Finding someone to love you is pretty hard in itself. Main cause of my social anxiety, distrust in people.

To me its easier to fix what I have than to start over. If I start over, its like the work I put into the other person was for nothing. If I "fix" a problem in a relationship I tend to feel accomplished about it.

People need to worry less about instant gratification and worry more about finding what matters and keeping it. Life isn't about gratification.

If things get any worse, people are just going to start using each other for casual sex, with no love or commitment. Not that it happens already, but it would be much more mainstream.

Agreed, I don't know why people can't just spice things up instead of giving up. If you're going to get bored with one person, you're going to be bored with the next, so whats the point?

There are worse things than being bored. Boredom can be remedied. Yes relationships can be stressful, but theres nothing wrong with having discussions based on the problems of the relationships. Discussions can lead to a better understanding of each other. No one is ever going to fully understand another person. Everyone has their own problems.

The whole YOLO thing is annoying too. It basically means act like an idiot and not care what anyone else thinks.

You have a lot of wise things to say, MetalMax. This thread is interesting.

I think people also get into relationships because they just don't want to be alone, not because they fancy the other person. I've done that before. As you said earlier MetalMax - you'd rather be in a relationship and bored than be alone. Isn't that rather cruel to the other person?

That depends if the other person is bored with me and wants out. Some females out there don't want to be alone either. Sadly theres not many females out there who are like me.

We aren't really taught to face things head on, we just learn to run away because its easier.

I bought a 22" PC monitor once, thinking it worked okay, but turned out it had bad capacitors.

Guess what? Instead of trashing it, I replaced the capacitors that were the wrong type, bulging, etc. with the right kind.

I was happy with it for a while too. Still works.

I just think people shouldn't allow themselves to get bored with their significant others. They aren't toys. You don't play with them 3 times, get bored and send it off to make glue.

Human bonds should be priceless, appreciated, and non replaceable.

Hi Metalmax,

I read this thread and there was a great deal of poignancy for me reading your reflections. I split up with my ex in May even though I tried really hard to keep it togather.

He cheated on me but I thought we could work through it and went to couples counselling and he was just not interested in changing anything even though I was and I find change far more overwhelming than he does. Felt like I was tossed into the trash when he said it was too late, his head had changed.. Too late? When did the timer start? It was like those 12 years we spent together meant nothing, expendable.