Trouble forgiving one thing - need perspective

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He insulted me agreeing I was "loose", "gross" and "ugly." I had a right to speak up. What if he was there and I agreed with someone that all men's penises were small and their area smelled bad? Then you guys would be up in arms saying he should leave me.

It's an insult to say a woman's vagina is loose. It means it's unpleasant to have sex with her. Also, I was angry at my boyfriend because he said "it's the gross, ugly truth," meaning that not only did he agree with the BS but that my - as a woman - vagina was loose was "the gross, ugly truth". Also, he knew full well how upset I was and acted angry at me for taking any kind of offense. Not only that but he changed the subject and claimed I was "inappropriate" in front of the couple's daughter as if that made it okay for him to say those things. He has never apologized to me for it.

Me: Why did you sit out there listening to that? Why didn't you speak up for me?
Him: Because it's the truth. It's the gross, ugly truth!
Me: So you think my body is gross and ugly. I'm gross and ugly. Thanks a lot!
Him: ... [Silence] Do you want me to drive you home?
Me: You know I hate those parts enough without you insulting them. Why don't I just get a sex change?
Him: Come on. Are you joking me?
Me: Not if you keep this up.
Him: Well, Paula said you were being inappropriate in front of Alyssa -
Me: I wasn't! And if I was that makes it okay for you to insult my body?
Him: ... Should we get going? Do you want to go home?
Me: No, I wanna see Kenny (my best gay friend from my GSA).

It's still hard for me to see whether he was intending to insult you with that comment or not. Based on the context provided, he might've said it in a hasty manner without thinking and thought it was true out of ignorance.

Also, keep in mind that your interpretation of what the married guy said may have been different from how your bf interpreted it.

Anyway, other than that incident, does your boyfriend treat you well otherwise. Or is this something that happens regularly in different ways and you always feel yourself being mistreated by him.

Every time he touches me down there or does anything now I feel like he's lying to me, and he's only doing it to make me happy but is grossed out. He says how tight and nice I am but it's still in the back of my mind.

I don't hate those parts, I just hate what they do. Periods make me feel smelly and less than human, and pregnancy disgusts and frightens me because of what it does to your body and that a lot of guys don't find their wives sexy anymore after they have kids.
Also: He was saying the "fact" all women have huge loose vaginas is "gross and ugly". Meaning that my vagina being loose was gross and ugly.
Plus, he didn't deny it when I asked if that was what he meant, nor did he apologize. He changed the subject to avoid it.

I would probably react the same way you did but I am not sure that is the best reaction. What could your boyfriend say that would put things back to where they were (before incident)? Admit what the guy said was a gross generalization, misogynistic, in no way pertains to you and apologizes? He does not seem to be really looking at why he thought it was funny.

I talked to him earlier and told him it was bothering me. He's going to apologize tomorrow when he visits for New Years and tell me, looking me in the eyes, that he will not believe anything that man says or repeat it to me and that if we go to another party at their house (which is doubtful) he will stay by me. He visits there all the time; the least he could do is pay attention to me when we're together there as a date. I will ask him to explain what he meant by the comment, if he thought before he spoke and why he thinks the guy is so funny. I am also not allowing him to touch me there, my breasts or perform oral on me tomorrow and possibly the next time I see him.

I'm sure he's rehearsing the lines you gave him for his big performance tomorrow.

Think of it this way... if you can't forgive your boyfriend for something minor that SOMEONE ELSE said, you'll be condemning yourself to a lifetime of meeting someone, they make one false move you can't forgive, you dump him and move on to the next. Very popular strategy these days, as well as witholding sex in order to punish him good n' proper. Yeah! Make that man SUFFER for his crimes!!

Or you can learn to not freak out over such minor incidents.

I'm sorry if I went into too much detail. I apologize.
Anyway, I'm irritated with him for what HE said, I know I can't control his friends, and I'm not going to break up with him. He's just about perfect besides the people he hangs with and this one incident.