Discrimination on looks is fairer than on personality

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First of all, this thread is combining several different issues - wrongly - into one. And, just to make it clear, in my response, "you" is the generic, plural pronoun, not intended to apply to any individual, unless the shoe fits.

When it comes to choosing a lover, partner, or what have you - every single person has the right to set whatever standards they want. I may find those standards silly or shallow, but as long as they don't demand that I apply those standards in my life, it's their business. That kind of relationship is far too subtle and intangible for anyone other than the parties involved to say what standards "should" apply. No one "owes" it to you to relieve your loneliness. I may feel sympathy for those who are lonely, but it would be no more fair to force someone else to supply their lack - in fact, it would be less so. I say that because even the lonely person would soon figure out the real situation, and be at least as miserable as before. Then you'd have two unhappy people instead of one. (If the only issue is the lack of a sexual outlet, there are prostitutes, who get paid for choosing to satisfy those desires. As long as they choose such a career*, I consider that, also, their own business.)

When it comes to choosing friends, I would certainly say that anyone who selects friends based on appearance over personality is shallow - but since I wouldn't wish to befriend such a person anyway, it doesn't matter much. And, again, who you choose to be friends with is a personal issue. If you apply certain standards, you may be, for example, a bigot - but I don't think anyone in the group you're prejudiced against would find it an improvement if you were forced to hang out with them.

When it comes to treating people with decency and respect, every single person deserves that. Unless they, by their own actions, trigger a different response, anyone who refuses that basic person to any other person on the basis of any aspect of appearance or personality deserves condemnation. Period. Don't date them if you don't want to, don't hang out with them, but if you can't at least treat them like everyone else in a general sense, then the problem is definitely your own.

When it comes to issues like employment, judging anyone on the basis of anything other than their ability to do the job in question is reprehensible. Period. In a society where there were enough small businesses that anyone could easily enough find a job, I might take a slightly softer stance. In this society, where major corporations dominate so much of the economy, to allow anything else is to permit those with irrelevant traits society doesn't approve of to be starved and shut out of life entirely.

* I do know this is rare. I do not intend to support human trafficking. I consider such an idea repulsive. However, there are women who do choose it as a career, for whatever reason. Those are the people I personally believe should be left alone, since they aren't harming anyone.

Last edited by theWanderer on 17 Feb 2013, 4:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.

You're right, of course. Which is only one of the reasons I loathe the fashion industry.

In my Non-NT opinion the following traits make a bad personality:

-racist
-sexist
-ageist
-homophobic
-constantly bragging about accomplishments, whether real or not.
-acts superior
-is a liar
-doesn't care about the environment i.e. drops trash on the ground because they don't know how a garbage can works.
-bullying
-bad mannered
-attention seeking (makes up lies, sob stories, or does stupid, dangerous things to get attention)
-hates animals
-is abusive to others whether its physical, emotional or sexual
-believes people who are "forever alone" are losers and thinks everyone needs a romantic interest, including themselves.
- is a lawbreaker, that includes seemingly "harmless" crimes like shoplifting
-swears constantly
-has little or no common sense (as if it's common to begin with).

Of course this is how the "normal" people are in today's society. May they all get a rare, horrible form of cancer and die slowly and painfully. But that's not likely going to happen because it's only "good" people who get punished.

I'd agree with you on most of that list. But the last three...

While I do agree shoplifting is bad, I am not so sure every law is important. I actually read somewhere that with all the obscure laws on the books, every single person has broken some law or other. (Example: they only repealed this year a law in Paris that women could not wear trousers without official permission.) So I'd say I agree with what you may have intended, but not with the literal interpretation of this statement.

Swearing... well, I'm afraid my father swore all the time, and even my mother, well... I learned to swear before I was old enough to know what the words meant. And I've never managed to get rid of swearing entirely. Of course, you have a right to think I'm a terrible person for that reason, but for myself, I don't think I'd judge anyone too harshly on this.

Common sense... I don't know if this is something that can be helped. What I consider common sense and what most NTs consider common sense don't tend to agree very well, either. All in all, I think I'd leave this one off my own list.

I believe it is technically possible to exhibit all those behaviours / opinions and still have a great personality. If true, it would explain the aparently unjust bad person / good person to good fortune ratio

On a needs must basis ie only when I have to

You're scaring me now!

You're advocating body fascism

and if people still aren't attracted to you after all this surgery you'll feel like a REAL failure!

+1

NT's advocate "personality fascism" (I do, too, just in a nicer way). What's the difference? I would rather live in a society that expects me to get plastic surgery, get a tan (I really DO need one of those...), and be physically fit than in a society that expects me to be an extrovert.

Last edited by Tyri0n on 17 Feb 2013, 6:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.

F-k Society! Why do anything at all to placate it?!

There is zero incentive for me

Last edited by nessa238 on 17 Feb 2013, 6:59 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Strawman. No one's actually specified 'extroversion' as a requisite, or even preferred, quality in their romantic interests. Not even NTs (see IlovemyAspie's post).

I wish I had your courage, or else the capacity to leave this country permanently...

Ilovemyaspie likes aspies. This is hardly representative of most NT's, or WP would likely not exist, certainly not this sub-forum. Most high-functioning aspies don't face discrimination because of autistic traits--which they hide--they face discrimination because of introversion that comes with hiding these traits. A few NT's like this. Most don't.

By getting plastic surgery you are making it harder for everyone else with facial imperfections

Plastic surgery makes society more intolerant of imperfection, which is not good for anyone's self esteem, as the boundaries
of what is acceptable in terms of looks will keep getting narrower and narrower

So you want all the loud, obnoxious, judgemental NTs to be your friend?

I certainly don't!

It seems less likely that people prefer extroverts, and more likely that they simply have more opportunities than introverts, as they are more outgoing/socialize more.