She shouldn't have even messaged me

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Was that the entirety of your correspondence with this girl? You should have been asking her about her interests......What is she obsessed with?

If she was really interested in SPKx , she would have kept the conversations going on even if he didn't ask a personal question early.

The "ok...enjoy your movies" comment sounds like it was meant to end the conversation. Whatever happened to disinterest her happened prior to that point.

I will do you the favor of imparting some sagelike wisdom upon you, sir. Every okcupid conversation I've had that ultimately lead to a date started with this formula.
Here's an example of the last one:

Me:
"Hi! What kind of games do you play?"
I ask a simple question about something in her profile. If she doesn't respond, it's clear she wasn't interested. Move on.

Girl:
"Better to ask which games I don't play Those would be mostly strategy games like Stratego, Risk, Chess, and political games. I love cards, dice, board games, and "role" games like Werewolves.
You're learning Tarot, huh? I got a set a long time ago but never learned. Your magician (aka: kitty) is adorable!"
Not only did she respond enthusiasticly, she made sure to comment on stuff from my profile (like how I'm dabbling in astrology and like to imagine my cat as a wizard.) That indicates that she read my profile and found something she's interested in.

Me:
"I just bought my first deck actually! I used to be a fairly firm skeptic about all that stuff but so far every reading I've had up until this point has come true in some way. I'm not sure I really believe in the mystical aspect though. I see Tarot more as a psychological science (think ink-blot test) than a religious tool.
I'm not crazy about the outdoors but I like the folklore and philosophies behind neo-druidism particularly in regards to pets/familiars. I'm very much an animal person (my bird and cat are like my children) and I sometimes feel like we have a strong spiritual empathy bordering on a psychic connection. I like to think that at least……
By Werewolf games, are you referring to Werewolf: The Apocalypse? I've never played it but my friend is running a "Mage" campaign using the same RPG system."
Now that it's clear she's somewhat interested I elaborate on some of the things she mentioned with stuff that I hope she finds interesting and easy to comment on (she indicated in her profile that she loves pets/animals so I made sure to emphasize that.) I also included a followup question about the games she plays.

Hopefully at that point the conversation should flow naturally.

Just based on what I've learned about women: The first strike might have been when you said "I think I was trying to be tongue-in-cheek". The bolded words might have made it sound like you were unsure of yourself and were grasping to come up with a defense. Plus, the sentence might have come off as a bit too wordy. If you had said something simpler and more straightforward like "I wasn't being that serious", maybe with a smiley afterwards, it might have come off better.

Beyond that, the "enjoy your movies" message could have possibly been a way to end the conversation, but it might have also just been her being playful and trying to be in on the joke. Either way, though, it was definitely a cue to drop the subject. Perhaps that would have been the best point to ask something about her. That *might* have gotten her to respond. Continuing to defend yourself after that definitely made yourself look desperate and overtly defensive, if you weren't there already. Of course, it's possible that she already had this perception of you being overtly obsessed with movies before she even messaged you, and wasn't ready to accept that, in which case it was definitely pretty tacky of her to even message you.

I know this all sounds really nitpicky, but unfortunately that's how a lot of NT women are. They'll look for any slight signs that someone is unconfident or isn't doing anything with their life. I'm sure you didn't mean to come off this way, and that movies don't really consume your life (not that I'd care anyway). But sometimes you do need to just take it in stride when someone questions you about something like this. Just a quick explanation that's not too defensive or long-winded will suffice, perhaps with a joke and/or smiley thrown in. You could even respond by teasing her about something on her profile. But after that, move on and ask her something about herself.

I bet she doesn't like geeks and once you've revealed yourself as geek she got totally turned off.

SPKx , I advice to avoid defining yourself with terms like Geek or Nerd or whatever...especially "geek".

"Geek" has a very negative connotations due to the stereotyped image of geek generated by the media.

In the media, geeks are portrayed as losers, mommy boys, basement dwellers, coach potatoes, virgins (which has its own negative connotations too)....etc. That's probably the image she got in her head once you've told her you're a geek.

SPKx , give yourself a chance to be discovered by the girl you're in contact with before defining yourself with a label. She will realize that you have geeky tendency but she might not see you as the media's typical geek.

And remember, you should keep in mind that almost any girl on dating site has more options than you; so even if you say or show her something that would just slightly turn her off, she would jump to the other options fast and never looking back to the previous one - no second chances, there are plenty of other options.

She was likely using the movie thing as an opener and then the whole conversation was about movies and she went running. When she saie "enjoy your movies" you could have said.. or maybe I should enjoy one of yours. What is your all time favorite? Then she would likely have told you and you could have asked her why it was her favorite then used something she said to steer the conversation in a different direction. I had great success on plentyoffish and did the same thing the other poster mentioned.. read the other persons profile and comment and question on it.

Also, some people start conversations just to be jerks