Should I leave my Aspi bf alone when emotionally distant?

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No, at least not to aggravate you. Only cause I thought it was strange an aspie would pass up sex, seeing is how most aspies never get married or have sex at all. I actually didn't think quoting something already out there for minors to see is much of a problem. "Honey want to have shower ***?" "Ooh, yes I dooo!"

Well, this aspie loop is very usual. You must get used to it, since this is not gonna change.

What should you do? I would suggest to apply the concept of 'fairness'. Aspergers (usually) give a high consideration to 'what is right' or 'what is fair'. So, let's say, if he's in his aspie loop and he doesn't pay any attention to you, but at the same time he expects that you'll be there when he'll get out of his aspie loop, that's not fair.

On the other side, if you expect that he gives up his special interests, this is not fair too.

So you can play the card 'fairness' to ask for a middle point.

Aspergers like rules. I would suggest, as an idea, to deal a middle points as, for example, every week you can interrupt him X times and he has to give up whatever he's doing and dedicate to you. Moreover, you could even do X small cards (both of you agree the number), that you fill up every week to the agreed limited number, with some text like 'A free amazing soiree coupon'. Then, whenever you feel lonely and he's in his loop, you slip subtly one of these cards in front of him.

You call that "graphic"? Talk about squeamish.

I don't think we quiiite crossed the line. Yet.

Hi guys,

Sorry if I crossed an ‘appropriateness’ line in this forum; was unaware of tone issues. Unfortunately I’m candid for a living so I need to remember to put the filter on sometimes (probably one of the reasons my bf and I get on so well!)

He actually came out of his loop last night (self-censorsing so I’ll spare you the details of how/why!) but thank you for all your advice - I know I’ll revert to it again.

Cranberria; While the reminder that this particular Forum (Love & Dating) is to be kept 'PG rated' is helpful, I don't think you crossed the graphic line. The reminder is useful to prevent a graphic plunge in possible responses.

Welcome to WP; hope to see you again.