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Why do girls hate shy guys?
They expect their men to protect them (sexism) 14%  14%  [ 15 ]
Society says shy guys are bad 18%  18%  [ 20 ]
Shy guys are worse at sex 4%  4%  [ 4 ]
Shy guys are just boring 22%  22%  [ 24 ]
Women who reject introverts are just as superficial as men who reject fatties (duh!) 13%  13%  [ 14 ]
Other 29%  29%  [ 32 ]
Total votes : 109

Jasper1
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29 Jul 2013, 4:07 pm

Somewhere I got the notion that shy guys can be looked at as a challenge by my more sexually aggressive women.

Some shy guys get sexually harassed. Usually by women they find really unattractive though.

Maybe shy guys are the wounded bloody animals limping through the forest of sexuality getting hunted by the cougars. The rest are too fast and too strong to snag in their teeth.



savvyidentity
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29 Jul 2013, 4:27 pm

Tyri0n wrote:
If it's shallow to reject a woman for her weight, it's equally shallow and more cruel to reject a man due to shyness.


You're 100% correct in that. Just because you can't "see" someones personality or character does not mean it's not shallow to judge someone for it when their character isn't harmful in any way. Men tend to be shallow in one way and women in another. That's just life maybe. But the fact it's shallow is indisputable.

We can all be shallow but it's by nature rather than choice sometimes. My point of view is that it becomes much more objectionable of people when they put real concious effort into being shallow by saying things like "I'd never date someone shy or unconfident" or "I'd never date someone overweight" or worse the very sexist view that "nice guys" are creepy (sexist because there seems to be no equivalent for women eventhough they are capable of creepy behaviour, but that's off topic). I'm sure theres more shallow things that both men and women say, but notice that our (mens) shallow views when they go beyond just natural drives tend to be about looks, whilst women for the same it tends to be about personality (point: nobody is "more" shallow in general).



babybird
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29 Jul 2013, 4:35 pm

I'm shy.


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29 Jul 2013, 4:58 pm

I was very shy in high school. Girls did not hate me, but they did not know what to say to me. So conversation rarely happened. Also, at the time, I interpreted female interest of any sort as romance, which is probably the number one pet peeve of women everywhere. Perhaps some women end up equating shyness with that kind of naivete. Once I gained more confidence, (because I finally knew what I was doing, not with women, but with my life) women showed interest back. The hardest part about "breaking the ice" is the ice. It is so much easier and more beneficial in the long run for both men and women if the man breaks the ice, because otherwise it looms over the entire friendship or relationship. Having said that, every friendship or relationship I've had started with her approaching me, although technically, in every case we approached each other. Every time I approach a woman I probably come across as controlling, mainly because I'm trying to make something out of nothing, which is what all controlling people do. That's not my intention, but it is the result. Because it's not who I am, so I come across as bad news, even when I do it well.



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29 Jul 2013, 5:21 pm

No idea, the guy I like is quite shy (yup, those footy-playing jocks can be shy too, imagine that).


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29 Jul 2013, 5:34 pm

I'm not shy, I'm just introverted. Not same thing.



auntblabby
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29 Jul 2013, 5:38 pm

i'm shy and nice, so I have two strikes against me. no wonder i'm a hermit.



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29 Jul 2013, 5:41 pm

Women like shy guys and women don't like shy guys. Not much else to it than that. Accepting the fact that many women do not like shy guys seems hard for some. It's not so much about entitlement, it is about being compatible. A lot of people choose to judge when they are not needed to, and a lot of people choose to care too much about them.


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Persevero
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29 Jul 2013, 5:59 pm

I'm pretty sure it's not "hating", just "not caring". Shy guys usually don't give people reasons to care about them.



Jasper1
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29 Jul 2013, 6:01 pm

How can you hate something that you love so much to toy with? :lol:



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29 Jul 2013, 7:49 pm

We don't hate shy guys. The reason a lot of shy guys don't get girls is because they don't talk to us, and when they do there are lots of times they just don't say very much.

You gotta be in the game to win, and a lot of the shy guys won't join the game and when they do it's just for one play. You can't get a Heisman that way.


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29 Jul 2013, 8:02 pm

a lot of shy guys [like myself] can't even comprehend "game." it is echelons beyond our reality. it is like a cat trying to comprehend a doorknob.



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29 Jul 2013, 8:05 pm

And when you get a shy man and a shy woman together it's stalemate.


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29 Jul 2013, 8:07 pm

auntblabby wrote:
a lot of shy guys [like myself] can't even comprehend "game." it is echelons beyond our reality. it is like a cat trying to comprehend a doorknob.


I just called it a "game", although dating is a game to a lot of people but not all. My point was that you just have to talk to girls to get a girl. You can't get one if you don't talk to her, and by that I mean actually talk and carry on a conversation and follow up on things with her. I compared it to a football game. If you are a football player and you sit on the sidelines every game and maybe get to play one or two plays all season you will never win a Heisman trophy. I understand that with the football analogy it's the coach's call about putting the guy in, and in this analogy the shyness could be the "coach" because it allows or prevents you from doing something, but unlike football where you can't just force yourself to get off the bench and run out on the field and play, you can force yourself to start talking to girls. If you don't know what to say or don't know how or anything then make friends with a girl and she can help you. That's how I learned about guys.


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29 Jul 2013, 9:11 pm

OliveOilMom wrote:
We don't hate shy guys. The reason a lot of shy guys don't get girls is because they don't talk to us, and when they do there are lots of times they just don't say very much.

You gotta be in the game to win, and a lot of the shy guys won't join the game and when they do it's just for one play. You can't get a Heisman that way.


women can talk to guys too,nothing stopping a women from approaching a guy.



auntblabby
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29 Jul 2013, 9:15 pm

billiscool wrote:
OliveOilMom wrote:
We don't hate shy guys. The reason a lot of shy guys don't get girls is because they don't talk to us, and when they do there are lots of times they just don't say very much.

You gotta be in the game to win, and a lot of the shy guys won't join the game and when they do it's just for one play. You can't get a Heisman that way.


women can talk to guys too, nothing stopping a women from approaching a guy.

THANK YOU!! ! QFT :star: