Wants A Relationship, But Extremely Doubtful...

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15 Oct 2013, 10:26 am

Blabby, weren't we discussing this the other day, yes it can possibly 'work', it just won't be as good as it could be, at best - and at worst, a downright sham.

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15 Oct 2013, 10:54 am

octobertiger wrote:

Blabby, weren't we discussing this the other day, yes it can possibly 'work', it just won't be as good as it could be, at best - and at worst, a downright sham.

in my eyes, a "downright sham" is not a functional relationship and should not be termed as such.

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15 Oct 2013, 10:59 am

In that case, you are saying that most relationships aren't relationships.

I just think that there are many shades, from the 'ideal' to the downright toxic. And many people just aren't givers, overall. Yet they end up in relationships, children, etc.

Last edited by octobertiger on 15 Oct 2013, 11:01 am, edited 1 time in total.

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15 Oct 2013, 11:00 am

octobertiger wrote:

In that case, you are saying that most relationships aren't relationships.

a functional relationship is one where both parties are getting the lions' share of their needs met. short of that, better off single and alone.

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15 Oct 2013, 11:03 am

But most people are terrified of being alone - they'd rather have anything than nothing.

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15 Oct 2013, 11:04 am

octobertiger wrote:

But most people are terrified of being alone - they'd rather have anything than nothing.

there is nothing to fear from solitude, it won't hurt you. sometimes, many times in fact, it is far better than to be in a dysfunctional relationship.

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15 Oct 2013, 11:40 am

auntblabby wrote:

octobertiger wrote:

But most people are terrified of being alone - they'd rather have anything than nothing.

there is nothing to fear from solitude, it won't hurt you. sometimes, many times in fact, it is far better than to be in a dysfunctional relationship.

I agree with this. So many people enter a relationship thinking it will solve thier issues. Most of those times the issues just amplify.

If you're narrowminded, insecure in yourself and lack emotional maturity. Nowhere will that be as obvious then in a relationship and it can lead to all sorts of disasters. Some people are better off alone.

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15 Oct 2013, 12:46 pm

I completely agree, too.

But let's face it, we're talking about it from our own point of view. To some people, what we describing - this beautiful isolation - is like hell. Sometimes I fail to appreciate it.

I think it's important to understand that others have a different version of hell, if we want to be understood ourselves.

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15 Oct 2013, 1:14 pm

octobertiger wrote:

I completely agree, too. But let's face it, we're talking about it from our own point of view. To some people, what we describing - this beautiful isolation - is like hell. Sometimes I fail to appreciate it. I think it's important to understand that others have a different version of hell, if we want to be understood ourselves.

it is not all bad, not at all. there are certain advantages to being alone. one never has to worry if one has offended anybody, one never has to walk on eggshells in terror of doing such. one is freed from arguments and awkward silences and angry separations and other such social drama. one never has to be sad and angry on account of a partner's sins of commission or omission. one can live as one wants and not have to warp that in the service of compatibility with another human. the list is endless. but the biggest advantage, is PEACE.

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16 Oct 2013, 3:00 am

Wafflemarine wrote:

Ya it can be tough but just keep in mind the amount of sh** people go though trying to be in a relationship. Any good stuff you may see is usually just shown on the outside to hide the shitfest it usually is that early in life. Get though school focus on only that and once that giant hurdle is done you will have a much more stable life for relationships and hopefully more money to run around doing stuff.

I am 24 and still working on getting the school and stable career before I try.

The original 150 are the only ones that matter for Pokemon.

I think Mew has something to say about that 150 number. :lol:

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16 Oct 2013, 10:18 am

Most people don't even make a big deal about intimate relationships, anymore. That's "old school" thinking. These days, the bulk of society isn't going to judge you if you haven't formed an intimate relationship yet.

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16 Oct 2013, 4:24 pm

octobertiger wrote:

I think that anyone who wants a relationship needs to realise: you put more into it than you get out of it, even in the best and most balanced relationships possible.

So even the best relationship is a net loss in your opinion? And I thought I had a negative view of relationships!

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Last edited by FMX on 16 Oct 2013, 4:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.

octobertiger
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16 Oct 2013, 4:32 pm

Well, it's a matter of the way it's seen, really. I just think it's a bad idead going into a relationship thinking get, get, get.

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16 Oct 2013, 10:19 pm

Geekonychus wrote:

You're in college right? Check out some of the various geek groups there (D&D, Magic Cards, Anime, etc.) You're a geek girl who likes MLP. I'm sure there's a veritable buffet of socially awkward guys who'd be interested.

I would, if my small university offered those kinds of groups to students like me. :roll:

However, I've seen a couple of pony fans while on campus before; most of them were girls, though. I'm also going to a MLP convention next month, so maybe I'll have some luck there.

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16 Oct 2013, 10:25 pm

Kinme wrote:

FluttercordAspie93 wrote:

Kinme wrote:

Of course died down? I still have an infatuation with Pokemon, lol.

I meant the teasing died down. I haven't given up yet on Pokemon.

Ahhh. Misread what you said. Pokemon is the worst thing to give up on. Period. ;p

Especially now.

The new games out right now are freaking amazing. I love how there's both new and old Pokemon. :wink:

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16 Oct 2013, 10:32 pm

Wafflemarine wrote:

I am 24 and still working on getting the school and stable career before I try.

I might actually try that, too.

But I do have quite a bit of money now, actually; not much of an impulse buyer as I was a few years back.

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