In a loving relationship; Distracted by other women

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Hey, you can't help subconcious behavior. Other guys glance at women too. She shouldn't blame you for what you're thinking. It's like Nineteen Eighty-Four, blamed for thought-crimes. As for watching TV, in real life there's 360 degrees to look in but for TV, there's only one direction to look at, towards the screen. Does she expect you to look away from the whole screen whenever there's a woman on TV? Or would she say you looking away is also a sign you're attracted to the girl on screen. Does she expect you to stop interacting with 50% of the whole human race? If you did that would turn you into a mysoginist save one. In otherwords you'd be unfairly shunning every women save your girlfriend.

Don't be influenced by her mysoginy. It sounds like she has self-esteem problems. She must know she's less attractive than those other women or she wouldn't be obsessing over them. Maybe she needs therapy to boost her self-esteem and help her stop comparing herself unfavorably to other women. Also, if you both become housebound, that is absolutely not healthy.So you get in trouble if you look at them and get in trouble if you don't look at them. Catch-22. There's nothing you can do to not get in trouble. If you love her you'll get her into therapy so she can stop putting you in these Catch-22 traps. Like I said above it's caused by her low self-esteem. She needs help from a qualified therapist so she can feel happy about herself.

There's an old saying. If you don't love yourself, you can't love someone else. I've often seen this saying proved true. The reason why your relationship is so sour is because she doesn't love herself, therefor she can't properly love you. If you get her into therapy she can learn to love herself and then she can love you and you'll both have a healthy relationship.

In the posts above, both men and women agree that there's nothing wrong with a quick-sidelong glance. It's expected, normal behavior. Your girlfriend's self-esteem problems prevent her from seeing that this is normal behavior on your part. Her problems cause her to create impossible standards for you, where you're not allowed to glance at a woman even for half a second (an uncontrollable reflex action on your part) and you also get blamed for not looking. It's not your girlfriend's fault. Everyone can potentially fall into low-self esteem. It's not her fault but it will be your fault if you don't get her therapy. Low self-esteem is very painful, if she doesn't get help, she will continue to suffer.

Is it bad if I think the girl in the top picture is better looking? Maybe what girls strongly believe isn't always a myth.

Hi, I found your post extremely beneficial to what I’m dealing with in my relationship with my boyfriend. I am always noticing when he turns his head to look at a female but I have realized that he hardly realizes he is doing it ..when I bring it to his attention he will say “sorry , I didn’t even realize I was doing that”.. fair enough because we all like to look at attractive l”things” in life but it got to be so consistent that I told him enough is enough. Also, not to brag but I am a very attractive female . I’m very slender , pretty face , average height , wavy hair etc .. so that hurts my feelings even more. I have had so many people tell me I should model and I don’t intend to sound basic, but I tell him he should appreciate what he has. Also, he doesn’t communicate very well / nor does he open up about his past .. I can sense that he may have had a porn problem in past years .. but he would never tell me . A lot of times I know he holds back on what he says because he is worried about hurting my feelings.. but it’s worse when I connect the dots and figure things out for myself. But after reading your post I feel hopeful that he does appreciate me and really doesn’t mean to be harmful whenever he glances at a woman

Unfortunately certain people in this world want to make guys look shameful and perverted for looking. It's a guilt trip.