Multiple guys competing for one girl

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Has it occurred to you that your attitude, this revolting business of girls-as-prizes to be one is why no girl will date, let alone f!ck you?

I don't even know what's so bad about being a prize. It means you're desired. I wish someone gave enough of a s**t about me to actually fight for me, and I could be the one regarding their desire with utter disdain and laughing at their frustration when they have no chance to make me reciprocate it.

Because I am a person not an object. Because I prefer that someone actually like me, not just the idea of me.

No, you don't want anybody who's fight over you. You're not an object either.

If you're going to have any view of it I would see it as the situation (i.e. sex or a steady relationship) being the prize and the woman being the gift giver or facilitator thereof (for sex) and/or potentially more if things go well. As for as competing goes, yes finding a mate is a competition, it's you versus everyone else of the same gender/preference trying to find someone that fits your tastes and will provide that which you are seeking in a relationship.

I've had a number of issues like this in the past. Part of my problem is not knowing any ND women in my area and not being able to find any good way of finding them. Generally speaking I'm short (5'6"), not too handsome, and the whole AS thing makes communication exceedingly difficult so I understand what the OP is going through. Sometimes you feel as though you have nothing to provide relationship-wise that someone else better looking and more capable can provide and then some. But the thing to keep in mind is that there is a large amount of the law of averages at work here. Meet more women, have more chances, and ultimately a higher chance of finding the one. Also take some time to seriously consider what you are looking for not just physically but mentally and emotionally from a potential partner and prioritize the last two. Who cares if she's a plain Jane when the two of you can really connect? And personally once you do connect those instincts start to kick in and their personal attractiveness starts to go up anyway.

That's just not true. There are quite a few attractive ND girls that are fed-up with the NT dating game, and they certainly don't feel like they are trophies to be won. Because they don't care about the NT dating game, they are not part of the attractiveness scale either, and won't necessarily look for a guy that matches them in attractiveness, but rather would favor somebody that they can get along with.

In essence, if you aren't NT you shouldn't buy they concepts, like their dating preference or their attractiveness scales. ND people simply cannot afford to be as picky as NTs, so we need to ditch these concepts that are for reducing the dating pool size for NTs.

Exactly. It's just silly to describe finding a partner as a competition.



I'd absolutely ditch a girl that wants to fight over me. That's not my style at all.

You need to separate causal sex and "friends with benefits" from romantic partners. Those are not the same, and I don't even think these things have much if anything in common. The former is a competition, and people involved in it are typically not very serious, and it's just game-playing. You don't want a long-term partner that sees you as a price he/she has won, and that will leave you when something better comes along.



Now you are discussing relationships as games and competitions again. The "law of big numbers" doesn't work in the relationship area for NDs. It assumes you can ditch people at any time, and that your attachment process is typical. The ND attachment process is not typical, rather NDs typically attach much faster than NTs, and this will lead to a lot of pain, and when repeated enough times, depression and giving up on finding a partner.

Rule #316 in the Dating Game Rulebook, make sure a girl you like doesn't view you as seeing her as a prize to be won.

Your attitude carries over. You think of girls as tokens to be won, it comes across that way, even if you're trying not to let it.

It is what they are making themselves. Prizes that can be won over and over by hundreads of people over small periods of time.

No I think of girls as slots to put my token into.


Rule #161 in the Dating Game Rulebook, make girls think that you don't only care about getting inside their pants.

Thankfully, those slots avoid you like the scum you are. Perhaps it is nature's way of keeping idiots like you from further contaminating the gene pool.

(It's not your autism, that's been around as long as there have been humans and is simply part of the mosaic that is the human race. YOU. Individually).

Well done white knight...

Of course we all want to f**k, we're animals. If we didn't want to f**k, we'd be extinct. Simple as that.

This is a profoundly unhealthy attitude to have about relationships and women. I would suggest working with a therapist to sort that out before attempting to date, as it doesn't sound like you are currently mature enough to have a romantic relationship without bringing these toxic ideas you have into them. Don't inflict this garbage on the girls around you, for their sake if not for your own.

This is because they can be. Most women seem to be looking for long-term relationships, and not one-night stands with the local jerks.

Most men will "take any decent-looking woman" because most men are not looking for a long-term relationship - they're just looking for c*m-catchers who can cook, clean, do laundry and bring them cold beer. As long as that is all they want, then "any decent-looking woman" will do.

Nah...maybe it was like that in the old days. That's a pretty apt description of Archie Bunker. Yet, even he grew up a little bit.

But, nowadays, men tend to be looking for a more substantial woman than that--a woman with whom they could debate issues and such.

I'd rather have a woman who can't cook, do laundry, or get me a beer than a woman with whom I could watch C-Span with (and make furious love afterwards!)