Masculinity issues in society

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TL;DR;

This isn't another "girls won't date me because they're only interested in douchebags who treat them bad" thread, is it?

Male beauty is focused on masculine features.
And female beauty is focused on feminine features.

And that's because we are apes.

I guess I do like men with "masculine" bone structure, but I tend to like them more when I see them reveal some sensitivity and affection. I can't be alone in that.

Fashion representation could be another factor. Back in 1930's everyone have to wear conservative clothing especially here in Australia. Showing skin like wearing a bikini today was banned. Today fashion became quite diverse. I am not sure if this factor makes people become lost of their minds at young age?

Its interesting to think about the history of what has changed from the past. Like music, reality tv shows, education and other influences. The world is more populated and this means more diverse. So this come to attention of stereotypes.

Masculinity and feminism has been sought for long time but until today the awareness level is higher than the past. I had a lecturer from my old uni talked about mental health correlation with the technology and society influence.

I always see people at my old uni have relationships based on short term seeing the guys are really macho, gym built and that. What kind of perspective or choice that people make for their relationships?

I think that part of the problem is the culture of instant gratification. People go for what looks appealing on the outside, someone they wanna sleep with and that only works as a relationship for so long if you're not taking things which make for greater compatibility into consideration.

EDIT: This is NOT finished. My top part got cut off.

EDIT 2: NOW it is.

To be fair, we live in a world where who you are as a person has NO control over your level of success.

Plenty of 'good' people remain single, and plenty of 'bad' people end up in happy relationship after happy realtionship.

'Good' and 'bad' depends on the person, but for this thread let's say a 'good' person is someone doing their best to be friendly, hardworking, considerate, selfless, kind, and cares about their appearance and health and hygiene.

And a bad person knows, chooses, and enjoys being rude, selfish, greedy, mean, aggressive, arrogant, and does not take care of their health or appearance at all.

Some people say "But the jerk who gets a girlfriend is ending up dating the kind of woman you would not want to date anyway."

But fact of the matter is, two 'bad' people ending up in a happy relationship is still more success than two 'good' people who stay single.

Two jerks ending up in a happy relationship together still are doing better than ME when it comes to relationships.

Anyway, I think you have it BACKWARDS Ecomatt, especially since you're Australian like me.

Young Aussie males today seem to be becoming MORE feminine than ever.

Our fashion is very metrosexual and feminine looking.

Young men use many gels and creams in their hair and on their skin, stylize their hair, shave many parts of their body (face, legs, 'down there', they shave just as much as women). Many young males here clean-shave their faces and use creams so their faces look as smooth and soft as a little boys.

They wear cargo shorts a little too high above the knee, white/blue/reddish pink v-neck t-shirts, knee high socks, and unflattering retro sunglasses.

Many also have the 'hipster' look and man-buns.

Young aussie male fashion looks very dorky and feminine.

I know you are not this Ecomatt because I have seen your pictures and videos. You dress very masculine and I admire that. I do too. And when I say that I do not mean bad masculine, but good masculine.

Masculinity is only a problem when it is hypermasculinity, that is too much masculinity.

Anyway, young aussie males, their personalities tend to be very sarcastic, passive-aggressive, shy, they identify as Feminist but not 'Equalist', they are sensitive and have more female friends than male. They tend avoid conflict, and are not assertive.

Young aussie men are either dorky dressing, feminine males, hipsters, or hypermasculine bro/surfer dude types.

Even then, many of the sporty males stylize their hair, shave their faces, use moisturizing creams to have smooth, feminine looking faces, etc.

Balanced, down-to-earth and normal young males seem so rare as it seems everyone is trying to be trendy, but also 'cool' and 'unique'.

In all soon-to-be 18 years of my life I rarely see males my age that look completely normal and neutral.

They're all dressing to follow some sort of trend. Geek, hipster, 'cool guy', whatever.

To answer your question, just because a male is strong does not mean he is a 'bad' person. He might be a perfectly good person who cares about his health, that's all.

He may have a girlfriend because he is simply confident, social and trendy.

Its very first time someone ever tell me I am masculine guy. Many of my friends always say I have feminine attitudes or personalities but never spoken about my appearance.

It would be odd if straight women didn't look at masculine attributes

Masculinity must have developed in an evolutionary way. With the traits most successful at propagating favored and becoming part of the code genetically as well as supported socially.

I believe what makes things out of balance today is that humans experienced a sudden and rapid technological advance that the genetic code and society have not kept pace with.

In the past people might go 10's of thousands of years with just a few tech changes, like how they made arrow points. Today such steps occur in months or weeks (days?).

So what you have is a partially very capable mind (call it an application) aware of many possibilities still trapped in a great apes overall operating system as Boo mentioned and with many still archaic social structures and beliefs.

So you often have situations where our instincts and upbringing no longer match the environment we find ourself in. And it may be that it is easier to try and adjust the environment rather then change integrally ourselves. Which may be why you tend to find groups trying to pull society backwards rather then change to match the new.

No matter what, straight women will look for masculine attributes in men--whether consciously, unconsciously, or subconsciously. It, definitely, is not the only criterium when seeking a man, though. It's much more than that. I don't think most women want to talk to men about the ways in which they do their nails.

But women, for the most part, find it at least somewhat important that a man looks masculine.

Same with men seeking feminine women. I don't seek the extremely-feminine type--but I do like a woman to have feminine attributes; I'm not attracted to women who are more masculine than feminine.