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Accidentally asked two women out...

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ShadowProphet
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08 Nov 2016, 2:29 pm

How well do you know these girls? Do you guys frequently talk to one another, would you two even be considered good acquaintances?

If they barely know you, then of course they're going to say no.

Generally speaking, the more you know someone the less likely you are going to ignore them.



Brianruns10
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08 Nov 2016, 7:17 pm

ShadowProphet wrote:
How well do you know these girls? Do you guys frequently talk to one another, would you two even be considered good acquaintances?

If they barely know you, then of course they're going to say no.

Generally speaking, the more you know someone the less likely you are going to ignore them.


But how can I get to talk to them more and get to know them more if I can't hang out with them? I gotta start somewhere or else I'll never get anywhere with anyone.



Chichikov
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09 Nov 2016, 7:23 pm

Brianruns10 wrote:
ShadowProphet wrote:
How well do you know these girls? Do you guys frequently talk to one another, would you two even be considered good acquaintances?

If they barely know you, then of course they're going to say no.

Generally speaking, the more you know someone the less likely you are going to ignore them.


But how can I get to talk to them more and get to know them more if I can't hang out with them? I gotta start somewhere or else I'll never get anywhere with anyone.

You start with people you are naturally around more, such as friends of friends, women that are habitually the same places you go such as shops\clubs etc, or whatever. Worse case women who work in the same place you do but that's generally a bad idea. If you try and instigate spending time with a woman that you have not already spent some time with before the answer is almost certainly going to be "no" and you'll be seen as a creep. That stuff only works if you have model good looks, are stinking rich etc etc, for the rest of us it's a marathon not a sprint.



AngelRho
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09 Nov 2016, 10:41 pm

Chichikov: well said. I dunno about that rich person bit, but you make an excellent point.

I'm one of those guys who weighs a bit heavy on the creep factor. I just have a certain "look" that I can't seem to help. What works for me is to just go solo in different places regularly just to be seen. EVENTUALLY, and it takes a while, I might make eye contact with enough people over long enough time that people get used to me. Then I can step it up and go for a convo. And that's usually just me asking a bunch of questions about them, doing what I have to so I can keep them talking. As long as someone believes you are genuinely interested in them, they will eventually look past the creep factor. It just takes a lot of time and patience on your part to get there.



The_Face_of_Boo
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10 Nov 2016, 3:06 am

Chichikov wrote:
Brianruns10 wrote:
ShadowProphet wrote:
How well do you know these girls? Do you guys frequently talk to one another, would you two even be considered good acquaintances?

If they barely know you, then of course they're going to say no.

Generally speaking, the more you know someone the less likely you are going to ignore them.


But how can I get to talk to them more and get to know them more if I can't hang out with them? I gotta start somewhere or else I'll never get anywhere with anyone.

You start with people you are naturally around more, such as friends of friends, women that are habitually the same places you go such as shops\clubs etc, or whatever. Worse case women who work in the same place you do but that's generally a bad idea. If you try and instigate spending time with a woman that you have not already spent some time with before the answer is almost certainly going to be "no" and you'll be seen as a creep. That stuff only works if you have model good looks, are stinking rich etc etc, for the rest of us it's a marathon not a sprint.


This is one of the most realistic posts.



HisShadowX
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19 Nov 2016, 2:50 am

Brianruns10 wrote:
So I met two women recently through work, both of whom are really smart and ambitious and cute to boot. I asked one out to an upcoming event via email, but received no response. Assuming she was not interested, I have emailed the other woman. However, I have discovered that the first woman may not have read her email, since the museum where she works is closed today.

Now the odds are most likely both women will decline me, because frankly, that's what I've grown to expect. And so frankly by writing two women I hoped my odds of getting a date with one of them would be better.

But I'm terribly worried that both might accept. What should I do if that should happen?


Play it cool first and foremost. Make sure they respect if they are into you that you don't mention to anything with coworkers and keep your relationship private.

I remember looking over eight years ago smiling to this girl in a row of cubicals that demanded I take her into the copy room and do such and such with her and her and someone else I dated smiled by back me.

Just try to keep everything compartmentalized



Thanatos86
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20 Nov 2016, 9:10 pm

Brianruns10 wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
Brianruns10 wrote:
The thing is I just have their email, from their business cards (we met in a meeting with an organization for which they both work).

And even if I did have their numbers, I'm too scared to call. And I don't want to put them on the spot. Phone calls are messy, and with emails, they can just ignore me if they're not interested and I get the message without having to endure the embarrassment of an outright rejection.


Hmm hate to say it but sounds like you may have misunderstood the situation...for one chances are the emails on their business cards are probably work email addresses for people to email them about work related things. If neither of them actually gave you a personal email or phone number to call or text I doubt they were interested in going out with you.


I just want to get to know one of them better. The first time there wasnt opportunity to exchange personal info, so I'm trying to forge something now. Hell I just want some company instead of going out alone for once.



Women can smell desperation and asking them out over a business email you got from their business cards wreaks of desperation. Maybe it'll work 1/100, but if you can't take the 99 that don't respond to to to get to the 1 that does, then you shouldn't pursue dates that way