What do guys look for in a woman?

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I get told my nice and friendly all the time, so I don't have an issue with that. I also got told I was funny the other day. I have a lot of natural charisma I don't actually use.

As for the guys who say respect, I do that too. I generally respect everyone until they piss me off at least 3 times. So there must be greater issues in me I'm yet to find.

I really enjoy it when someone notices a positive thing that I do, and then compliments me on it. It shows me several things: they paid attention to me, we consider the same thing as positive, and they have the ability to give a compliment. Those indicate the possibility of a really good relationship. That's an example of the kind of respect I mean.

Thinking of it rationally, getting that kind of support on a regular basis would please anyone, and relationship counselors always tell people to do those things, so someone who has already made that a part of their personality seems like a real catch.

Even so, men seem to respond to it more powerfully. I don't know why.

They are looking for respect and compliments.

I always feel like I don't want to come across as a sycophant. I find it hard to trust men and I feel like if I'm too complimentary they'll know I like them and they don't like me and I'll get made fun of for mooning over someone everyone else knows is out of my reach.

So I tend to be jokey and sarcastic instead to protect myself.

I'm honestly a nice guy. And at least me but not most guys go for women with more nice and friendly features rather than attractiveness but kinda a little with it. Not much though.

Feistiness is also good, so long as it's a tool for setting boundaries, and not used to trample on others' feelings.

I should take a page out of your book. I'm far to trusting in mankind in general so people tend to screw me over a lot.

I'm going to disagree with this... given your tendency to seem vulnerable, your dating solution is not to become even more passive. I think the best thing you could do is try to take on the active role in dating. If you want to go out with someone, ask him out. Make sure he seems like a decent guy and make the first move. Otherwise, if you're not interested in a relationship, sure -- no need to go out of your way to find somebody.

If your response to being taken advantage of is to hang back and wait for a 'nice' guy to come around, you'll just end up reeling in the same abusive people. You have to take some control over your situation! Passivity is the problem, not the solution.

Obviously I can only speak on my own behalf here, but generally, two crucial traits I look for in a potential partner are honesty and open-mindedness. I myself am honest and open-minded, and I want my partner to share those traits. Everything else is secondary.

I became attracted to most any single women who was nice towards me. I was mostly wanting a women who seemed like she would give me a real chance & try to make a relationship work with me.

I already found you attractive but I do not have much social-time available for anybody at this stage in my life due to needing to deal with an incredibly intrusive and corrupt government that is trying to violate my rights.

I don't consider myself qualified to answer your question because I have my own ideas about what's attractive, some of which are diametrically at odds with what men are "supposed to" find attractive.

Ah thanks, that actually makes me feel less angry with someone. Its hard to work out if a man is being shallow when that happens or if he's just really lonely.

To women that's a bit of a red flag because it feels like he'll move on once another friendly woman turns his head.

Red flag or not; he had three gfs - so he's doing something right.

I already have those traits so clearly I'm doing something right



Aww, thanks. I can understand how that can take up a majority of your time as I have a friend who has a similar issue to that.



I'd still like to hear them please. We're all unique after all and I expect there are some people like you in the area I live or study in

To me the most attractive trait in a woman is empathy, and I don't mean this fake new age attention seeking kind of empathy, trying to win social brownie points from others. But real genuine empathy for others, makes me open up and makes it easier for me to build trust. Second most would be intelligence.

Looks wise I am only picky about weight, otherwise I find many different looks attractive.