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I'm the worst

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Campin_Cat
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21 Mar 2017, 7:36 pm

ltcvnzl wrote:
@Campin_Cat although I think it was a harsh thing you said, it maybe be true. I'm not proud of it and I'm not doing this because I want :/ I just never loved anyone else neither had a close friend :/

Another thing that it might be----and I did this when I was your age----it might be that you're pushing people away, because you don't think you're worthy; and / or, you're hurting, before they have a chance to hurt YOU.

When I was your age, I had gone-through an entire lifetime of my mother putting me down, practically as often as she exhaled----then, like others here, people in school put me down, as well, calling me "Spaz", and stuff----so, like any kid, I began to believe it (also, like alot of Aspies, deep-down-inside, I knew I was "off"); hence, I didn't think I was worthy of anyone loving me, or being my friend.

Also, loving someone can be very scary (aside from just your basic "fear of the unknown")----you are at your absolute MOST vulnerable----it's like reaching into your chest, with your bare hand, and ripping-out your heart, and handing it to the other person, and trusting them not to rip it to shreds.




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Sabreclaw
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21 Mar 2017, 9:58 pm

If he's not into you, he's not into you. Nothing you can do about that. Maybe in time he'll change his mind, but definitely not if you stir up drama; that'll just breed resentment.



Chronos
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21 Mar 2017, 10:09 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
^ OP, you were just being accused of being a "Nice Girl".


Not quite because she starts arguments with him and treats him poorly, and "Nice Girls" like "Nice Guys" usually go out of their way to avoid conflict, and are unusually nice, but she has definitely put herself in the friend zone, and should leave and go on to better things.



Chronos
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21 Mar 2017, 10:14 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Well, we men no longer like "Nice girls" , with a capital N.


:lol: We had literally thousands of threads and posts here by women complaining and criticizing Nice Guys (they never seem to understand that love may grow toward a friend with time even if there was no attraction at the very start, so they accuse the guys being malice and acting as friends from the very start in order to get into girls' pants- and they don't seem to understand that love hormones may make one irrational.).

This thread is special though because for the first time the gender are reversed. :lol:

I am going to be like the female users here, and criticize the "Nice Girls" sharply. I ll be do the same narrative. :mrgreen: :mrgreen:


I have no objections to this.



jrjones9933
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21 Mar 2017, 10:14 pm

It is kind of too bad, though. This thread title would also suit a competition. Maybe we can take it off the rails after the OP gets the information she needs?

Like: No, I'm the worst. No one can stand me for more than six months.


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ltcvnzl
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21 Mar 2017, 10:24 pm

Chronos wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
^ OP, you were just being accused of being a "Nice Girl".


Not quite because she starts arguments with him and treats him poorly, and "Nice Girls" like "Nice Guys" usually go out of their way to avoid conflict, and are unusually nice, but she has definitely put herself in the friend zone, and should leave and go on to better things.


I don't care to be in a "friendzone", he is a nice friend and I wish I could keep this friendship but because of this feelings conflict I can't even be a good friend :/ that's what annoys me most



Alliekit
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22 Mar 2017, 5:59 am

You have to stop hating on yourself it's not going to help your situation. You are aware that what you are doing isn't fair. He sounds like a good guy so I'm sure talking to him and apologising would help with the situation. Sometimes these things take time.

Find a healthy way to work out your feelings or you risk losing a friend. At the same time don't be too hard on yourself love is very very confusing and irrational.

If it makes you feel better I once slapped a boy I had a crush on because I didn't know how to express my feelings (luckily he was good natured about it)



RetroGamer87
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26 Mar 2017, 3:11 am

Boo, please stop taking your gender war out on Itcvnzl. I get that some feminists probably called you a Nice Guy but that doesn't mean you need to get some other girl caught up in the cross fire.


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RetroGamer87
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26 Mar 2017, 3:16 am

ltcvnzl wrote:
I have this guy I love but he doesn't love me back but he wants to be friend and often I start dramas out of nothing and things get out of control

I have a very weird mood sometimes, I understand some minor thing wrong and then I can't go back and when I see we are arguing :( I feel bad because he had an important day today and I ruined it when he came to tell me

that's why nobody will never love me
Wrong! If someone loves you he'll be able to deal with your flaws. We all have flaws and when you find a guy who loves you he'll tolerate your flaws, including your weird moods.

Anyway, you can't be the worst because the worst are those people who have no capacity for remorse. You ruined his day and you feel bad about it. A truly good person wouldn't care if they ruined someone's day. To me this indicates you're a good person.


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