Would you be willing to enter a sexless relationship?

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Nope. Sex isn't an obsession (at least, not with me); it's a biological drive and a basic human need. I need a lover, not a roommate.

I must be strange then.
I'm an artist that wouldn't ever even consider drugs.

At least one person brought up a good point. Aren't you describing a close friendship?

Isn't a "lover" someone who you are or at some point were sexually intimate with (e.g. elderly couple who were but no longer are sexual) and you continue to have a relationship whereas friendship is having a close relationship with someone but you've never been sexually intimate?

I don't think so. There is such thing as being emotionally intimate without being physically intimate, and there is a greater level of commitment required in a relationship rather than a friendship as far as I can tell.

What do you describe as being 'emotionally intimate'?

Hmmmmm.....That would be an extremely unique and rare situation for two people capable of having sex to agree sex would be forbidden in the relationship and for both to be OK with that for as long as the relationship endured.

I know of a rare situation in the Catholic church were two hetero people can live together in effect as husband and wife but vow to be celibate. That's kind of what you're describing. They're committing to each other in a form of a relationship but completely non-sexual.

I can’t

Nein

I would. I mean, Im not going to fall in love with somebody based on how good they are in bed. Im going to fall in love with who they are as a person. So if we both decide that we dont want to have a lot of sex, than thats fine. However, just because we are not engaged in the actual act of sexual intercourse would not necessarily mean we cannot be intimate or romantic. I am perfectly capable of loving someone without having to act like a dog in heat.
In my personal opinion you dont need sex to have a loving relationship and its sad that sex gets so hyped up in society. Sex is simply a physical act to fulfill the biological need of reproduction in the human species. Somewhere along the line society slapped a whole lot of emotions and symbolism on it and now somehow sex=love. Which is ironic since sex can also mean something a whole lot worse than love. Ive been in plenty of situations where sex was almost the outcome and I certainly did not love that person or want to be anywhere near that intimate with them. A lot of people have loveless sex. Theres literally an industry for it. Besides, in my experience its awkward, gross, and hurts like hell and I dont ever want to get pregnant, sooo nah man Im good.

I'm very glad that isn't true.

If sex isn’t for you, don’t start having sex. And I really do think virginity is best lost to your spouse, and not sooner than you’re married. I didn’t start having sex until I was in college, and it was with my high school sweetheart I’d been dating for a few years. The plan had been to get married. We’d been fooling around when things went too far, and it wasn’t long after when it became routine.

Once that starts, it’s just expected. And then it’s just fun, and everything about it feels good. By “expected” I don’t mean someone demands you do it. I mean you’re alone together long enough you can’t help but give in to it. And then the way you feel afterwards makes the buildup worth it. It’s a wonderful experience being connected with someone in every way possible.

People obsess over it because there’s nothing like it, and most people crave that deep connection with another person. I think most people really are just lonely, and people who are casual about sex are really just using it as a drug to relieve that pain or to avoid it altogether. There are better ways, though, and sex is better when you’re already living a happy and fulfilled life.

If you are not comfortable giving your body to someone like that, don’t start. Or it you’re not a virgin, there’s no need to keep having sex if you don’t like it.

However, marriage serves many purposes, one of them being possibly having children. Sex serves as a way for marrieds to bond emotionally and feel good together in addition to making babies. If you agree to marry someone, it’s pretty much understood that sex is part of your reality. It will likely be expected. You don’t have to lose your virginity to know whether you’d enjoy sex. You’ll feel the urge to have sex at some point, often at a young age. You can self-stimulate to climax. If that sounds gross and icky, and you’ve never had that, and the idea strikes you either indifferently or with utter revulsion, and you can’t even imagine a man doing that to you much less you enjoying it, then sex is not for you. I’d take that a step further and say don’t get married. Your husband very likely will expect it at some point, and I don’t think it’s fair to marry someone with the implicit promise of intimacy and then it never happens. I’ve known at least one couple like that, only it was the husband who, I think, was icked out by the idea of sex with his wife. He insisted on waiting for marriage...and then nothing happened. They stayed married for a long time before she eventually left him. I just think if you love someone enough to get married, you owe it to your spouse AND yourself to learn how to enjoy sex. If you already know that’s never going to happen, you’re better off single.

After my fiancée and I split, it was difficult being in a relationship and NOT have sex. Later on in grad school, I fell in love with a freshman. She was a virgin. I told her that I loved her, and we dated a few months. But I also told her right away that eventually I’d want to start having sex and that if she thought that would be a problem then we had to break up. She told me she was ok with it and just needed some time. I don’t think she was ever really “ready.” But one night it just happened. We stayed together through the next year of college. I was sad that we broke up, but I graduated and our lives were going in different directions. I think it’s more important that you be honest about what you expect and everyone in a relationship understand what is or what is not going to happen and accept that. It’s easier to find a partner who wants sex than it is to find one who does not.

No thanks. Sexual attraction is a big part of why most people get together, at least early on. I would not buy a ring and sign my life away to someone who didn’t want intimate physical interaction of any kind.

I’m a musician. Same. And that’s probably the worst analogy I’ve ever heard. Significantly altering your mind makes the act of creation difficult. You can’t usually have the experience and remain physically functional enough to realize your imagination. Most art and music inspired by drug use was made AFTER the fact. Creatives have the ability to represent reality or produce distortions of it. Creatives who need chemicals in their bodies are more like professional athletes who need steroids. You have to wonder if they really are authentic.

You CAN have sexless relationships and even marriages. There’s nothing WRONG, nothing missing about that. But when you consider having that relationship, you do have to take the other person’s values into consideration. If you find someone who wants companionship, can handle
SOME intimacy, but emphatically NOT into sex in the least, you might have a good match.

I suppose if you’re using the artist analogy, a relationship without sex for someone who expects to have it is like giving an painter every color except the one he needs. He might manage to mix a substitute—but that’s all it will ever be.

If I were to enter such an arrangement long-term, I'd basically have to come to terms with the fact that I would never experience sex with another person in my entire life. No thanks. Unless of course you would permit your partner to fulfill the need elsewhere and have sex with people outside of the relationship/marriage, in which case they could just get with someone who would fulfill the need anyway instead of you. For most guys, giving up any chance of ever having sex again is a BIG deal, and no woman is worth that. You'd be best off looking for an asexual, because that's the only way I can see that you'll find a man who would be okay with that arrangement. Judging by the responses here, maybe you should seek out women as they seem more open to a sexless relationship, and if you're not having sex then you don't need sexual attraction, so gender ceases to matter.

Interesting how both 'Yes-I'm female' and No-I'm female are equal so far, while the males are twice not willing compared to the willing ones.

To be honest I'm surprised that the no is only double the yes for guys. I'd think this would be a dealbreaker to like 90% of guys. But then I guess maybe some on the autism spectrum are asexual or have tactile sensory issues so that might account for it. Even guys like me who have never had a relationship despite wanting one would pass up this proposition.