Will going too the gym help?

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It will certainly help.

Being physically fit is generally considered to be more attractive than being physically unfit. Just make sure you do your research about the proper way to exercise to achieve the results you want. And don't forget about the importance of a proper diet!

Also, don't expect to get "big" immediately. Getting "big" takes years of hard work and dedication.

I worked out with weights and with aerobics with great consistency about 20-25 years ago. My body hardly changed, though I felt better.

I had to wait in a long line recently and decided to do a little experiment while I was waiting: I looked at all the heterosexual couples to see if any had a bigger height discrepancy than I did (over a foot taller than the Mrs.) To my amazement, most of the couples were either roughly the same height or the woman was slightly taller! It wasn't a case of the women wearing heels either as few had them on. All the short guys I know at school always had women hanging off them and I have never understood this "women like tall men" because I see little evidence of it outside of online dating.

I hit the gym and was in great physical shape when I was single (6'6", 200lbs), ran a 10km race in under 50 minutes and I couldn't not get female attention if my life depended on it. I was even in a female dominated exercise group (at time the only male so it was hard to find a "resistance partner" I wouldn't have knocked to the floor) Still, I got no attention positive or negative.

At one point, I could do 10K in 40 minutes. If anything, women tended to think I was too thin then. 5 foot 5, 145 lbs.

Just go to the gym to please yourself. Women can see right through you if your intention is to impress them.

WOW 6ft6 is TALL.........

Could it be that women were attracted to you, but you didn't know? Certainly for men it must be hard b/c women are less likely to come up and tell one in no uncertain terms.

I would self-report that I know when someone is attracted to me. When I read that Aspies often don't know, I laugh: of course I would know. But in reading my childhood letters, I now recall many times in my first half-life that boys proclaimed their love for me and I didn't know. Heck, when my husband (boyfriend at the time) called me, I asked him straight out why he called. I must have known he was attracted to me, but I didn't want to assume, right?

Absolutely! Just set a routine and keep to it.

Going to the gym will probably help you attract people who like people that go to the gym. If those are the kind of people you chiefly wish to attract, join a gym a.s.a.p.

One of the sexiest men I've ever met was shorter and slighter than you, and he'd never been near a gym in his life except maybe when a school exam was held in one. He had charisma and you could just tell he'd be good in bed (later confirmed by a 6-foot-tall ex-girlfriend of his whom I happened to be talking to). I had quite a crush on him myself, and I was still calling myself 100% heterosexual back then! But not everyone reacted to him in that way, so clearly his charisma and his electric sensuality were not all-conquering, e.g. not long ago I was recalling him in conversation with a mutual acquaintance who'd never understood what anyone could be so turned on by about this guy.

I have no body worth mentioning and I've spent a lifetime avoiding the gym and I'm not especially charismatic, yet a few girls have, over the years, professed themselves magnetically drawn to me (I think this can sometimes be an Aspie superpower). If I could cope with going out more than I do, I'd probably meet more of them. Not sure I'd be likely to meet them at the gym, though.

Exercise can generate endorphins and stuff that can cheer you up. But you can get that effect by climbing a hill or riding a bicycle.

p.s. Apologies to anyone who actually knows what an endorphin is: my use of the word "generate" is almost certainly incorrect. I wouldn't know an endorphin if it jumped up and bit me in the face. I admit this publicly, here and now, before someone tears me apart for terminological inexactitude rather than looking at what I was actually trying to say (had a somewhat bruising experience of that sort earlier, trying to be more careful now...).

Is 151 pounds unacceptably thin for a guy who is barely 5ft8 like myself?

You weigh more than me and I'm 5ft 11 (but very skinny), if that's all muscle you might not be doing too badly already

i have heard its a lot more socially acceptable too be skinny if your tall than if your under average height

I'm honestly unsure, but either way buffing up a bit will probably (depending on your culture) help with quite a few girls and is very unlikely to upset the remainder

I started going to the gym and now I go 6 days a week. It's helped physically, and I have seen vast improvements in my health overall. My workouts have grown in intensity and I can lift weights that I never thought I could lift. If I'm honest, though, it did not help me much with dating (aside from a few compliments). That's OK because I go for myself.

Strangers on the internet are not telepathic and don't know what "most women" want

Appearance matters. But society overvalues appearance.

Different women like different things

Plenty of men much shorter than you are married to women

5'8 is not too short, depending on where you were born

Going to the gym, all things equal, is a good thing, for you

But not all things are equal

The solar system contains other methods of making yourself more attractive to prospective dates

Height is only one factor in appearance



Match for com

That's a very good point and you may be correct. Perhaps this is half the issue: I have referenced a 20 year coworker (when I was 21) and I didn't ask her out because I felt she would make it obvious she was interested and she never did. I now realize that many women simply do not make the first serious move, my own wife included. I was VERY close to calling it quits after the third date because she showed little signs of being interested in me but I decided to "swing for the fences" and kiss her and clearly I must have done something right.

I have mentioned it before but here are a few more examples looking back that I missed:
* At 18, a 20 year old female coworker invited me to her hotel room to "have a drink" to which I replied I wasn't 19 yet.
* Another 20 year old coworker literally threw herself at me and when I caught her and asked what she was doing claimed she was just practicing her ballet moves.
* When I was 27, a younger coworker used to tell me that I looked really good almost every day, one time even giving me a "half-wink" to the point mutual coworkers thought we were in a relationship.
* I once had a women walk close to me, smile and say hello..... at 2am in a dark downtown parking garage. She actually walked away from her vehicle too so it wasn't a case of protecting herself from a potential dangerous man. There was a 99% chance she was at the movies by herself just like me.

My ex and my wife are very different but one thing they both said to me repeatedly was how many women blatantly check me out in public. I only noticed that when I was dressed up in my fancy business attire. The Mrs. recently admitted she doesn't like it when I don't wear my ring because so many women check me out, especially since we have a baby. That begs the question, is it really any better to have interest but be completely, 100% oblivious to it?

Apologizes for sidetracking the thread but I think this information is valuable for the OP. He sounds like a pretty swell guy and is closer to finding the love of his life than he thinks.