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Are you ready?
80-100 29%  29%  [ 6 ]
60-80 29%  29%  [ 6 ]
40-60 14%  14%  [ 3 ]
20-40 10%  10%  [ 2 ]
0-20 19%  19%  [ 4 ]
Total votes : 21

Beenthere
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07 Aug 2007, 2:28 pm

I am about a 40 give or take a few points...basically what I expected, which is why I'm not dating or looking for that matter. The first three questions were an easy 10...I know what I want, I know what I require, and I am happy....

1 I know what I want. I have a clear vision for my life and relationship. I can envision my perfect life in rich detail that feels strong, very real, and keeps me motivated.
2 I know my requirements. I have a written list of at least ten non-negotiable requirements that I use for screening potential partners. I am clear that if any are missing, a relationship will not work for me.
3 I am happy and successful being single. I enjoy my life, my work, my family, my friends, and my own company. I am living the life that I want, and I am not seeking a relationship out of desperation and need.

...the rest of my life is a bit of a train wreck...but at least it's a wreck I'm familiar with by now. :lol: Baggage I have and in designer colors and all sizes.

Good luck MrMark...

...and calandale...well, at least you're not alone if that makes you feel any better. :lol:


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calandale
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07 Aug 2007, 2:32 pm

Beenthere wrote:

...and calandale...well, at least you're not alone if that makes you feel any better. :lol:


If for different reasons. Thing is, I've entered into all
of my relationships in pretty much this state. And
they always lasted for a decent amount of time.

Since they ended, they weren't successes, but,
at least when younger, I seemed to hold on to
romantic engagements longer than my friends.



FirstandEllen
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07 Aug 2007, 7:00 pm

calandale wrote:
36! :P


I don't agree with the test at all though.

Going into something with a list of non-negotiables?
I mean, if I made those, I wouldn't be able to
find a human who could meet them. Not without
being with me first.


I got a 90.

And that one stuck out at me like a sore thumb- 10 things?? That's nonsense. You can be accepting without being a doormat. When it's the right person, you find ways to deal with whatever you need to.



Pugly
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07 Aug 2007, 7:10 pm

FirstandEllen wrote:

I got a 90.

And that one stuck out at me like a sore thumb- 10 things?? That's nonsense. You can be accepting without being a doormat. When it's the right person, you find ways to deal with whatever you need to.


Yeah, if I was really nitpicky... I could pick out 10 things. But that's pointless... when I could just define a couple of general perfernces that I like and use that.

Also I think it's a sign of immaturity to think of something that is absoultely a deal breaker... (well outside of simple things... like no criminal record... or politicians)... people are much more complex and interesting than that.


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calandale
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07 Aug 2007, 7:15 pm

Pugly wrote:
(well outside of simple things... like no criminal record... or politicians)


HEY! What's so big about a couple of arrests?
It's not like I served on the city council or
anything. :P



pbcoll
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09 Aug 2007, 1:02 am

62. Never mind...


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Ragtime
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09 Aug 2007, 8:43 am

A test of "Relationship readiness"? Then what's all this crap I keep hearing about "accepting each other exactly the way you are"? I actually bought into that latter myth. :roll:

I guess it's "accepting each other exactly the way you are after you improve".


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MrMark
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09 Aug 2007, 8:55 am

I think that after the initial "love" wears off, and you see the other person in a more realistic and less romantic light, then you have to decide to accept or reject them as they really are. If you decide to accept them as they really are, then that's where the real love begins.


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Pugly
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09 Aug 2007, 9:27 am

Ragtime wrote:
A test of "Relationship readiness"? Then what's all this crap I keep hearing about "accepting each other exactly the way you are"? I actually bought into that latter myth. :roll:

I guess it's "accepting each other exactly the way you are after you improve".


Isn't that a part of being ready for a relationship?

If you aren't ready to accept someone's foibles... you are not ready for a relationship.

Foible being a minor character flaw...


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Wonder what it feels like to be in love?
How would you describe it, like a push or shove?
Guess I could pretend that this is all I need
Wanting more than what I have might appear as greed.


Beenthere
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09 Aug 2007, 11:41 am

Personally I enjoyed #8....

8. My family relationships are functional. My relationship with my children, ex-partner/spouse, siblings, parents and extended family do not interfere with having the life and relationship that I want.

Define "functional".... :lol:


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Pugly
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09 Aug 2007, 11:48 am

Yeah what if you are functional... but your parents/siblings are dysfunctional... whoops you can't be in a relationship.

Who made up this stupid test... it sounds like they are trying to sell a book.


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Wonder what it feels like to be in love?
How would you describe it, like a push or shove?
Guess I could pretend that this is all I need
Wanting more than what I have might appear as greed.


Phasianoraptor_hirvisaloi
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09 Aug 2007, 1:25 pm

18. :cry:

It's possible I wouldn't be very good yet by most standards, due to my total lack of experience I've failed to get. No courage, either...at least if I was meant to make initiative.



calandale
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09 Aug 2007, 1:55 pm

MrMark wrote:
I think that after the initial "love" wears off, and you see the other person in a more realistic and less romantic light, then you have to decide to accept or reject them as they really are. If you decide to accept them as they really are, then that's where the real love begins.


But the whole point of that first blush seems
to be to make it POSSIBLE to overlook the flaws,
and get used to them.

Incidentally, how long do people find that this lasts?
To me, it seems to be years.