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Can anti-age gap people afford to be so picky in dating?

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babybird
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31 Aug 2022, 3:27 pm

nick007 wrote:
I do not like the word Tolerate being used here. The word tolerate sounds to me like someone is being inconvenienced like how I tolerate sitting near a crying baby on a bus or I tolerate the temps being in the 90s sometimes in the summer. Being in a relationship with an age gape or being non-binary should NOT be affecting anybody else.


The word "tolerate" doesn't bother me. But I'm actually quite offended by the words "we're all forced". I'm not forced to do or think anything in any particular way.

It sometimes feels like the least accepting people are the ones who expect to be most accepted.


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IsabellaLinton
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31 Aug 2022, 3:28 pm

I don't know of any couples who are less than 5 years apart in age, except for teenagers.

My first bf was 22. I met him on my 17th birthday and later married him.
Second bf was 11 years older than I was.
Third was 14 years older.
Current is 7 years older and that feels weirdly "close" in age.

My parents got married when mum was 19 and dad was almost 25.

Why would age matter, and why do you care what other people think?


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kraftiekortie
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31 Aug 2022, 3:29 pm

My wife is 12 years older than I am.

Nobody gives two craps about that....



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31 Aug 2022, 3:30 pm

Joe90 wrote:
We're forced to tolerate non-binary people, large age gap differences should be tolerated just as fairly too. I'm in a large age difference relationship too and I think there's nothing wrong with it so long as you're both consenting adults.


Forced?

Who controls you?

By all means, don't tolerate me if it's such a bother.


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TwilightPrincess
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31 Aug 2022, 4:23 pm

“Acceptance” and “tolerance” are different words with different shades of meaning.

Some people do use them interchangeably, but when an individual claims that they are “forced to tolerate” someone or something, it seems to be very far away from true acceptance.


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DanielW
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31 Aug 2022, 5:27 pm

Joe90 wrote:
We're forced to tolerate non-binary people, large age gap differences should be tolerated just as fairly too. I'm in a large age difference relationship too and I think there's nothing wrong with it so long as you're both consenting adults.


Are people really forcing you to tolerate non-binary folks? You're supposed to treat everyone with courtesy. If anyone has to be forced to do that, that says more about THEM than anything else.



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31 Aug 2022, 7:49 pm

Sorry, I thought "tolerate" was another word for "accept". That was what I was using it as anyway.

Then people wonder why I write threads like this:

viewtopic.php?f=3&t=408351&p=9122756#p9122756


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31 Aug 2022, 7:54 pm

Joe90 wrote:
Sorry, I thought "tolerate" was another word for "accept". That was what I was using it as anyway.

Then people wonder why I write threads like this:

viewtopic.php?f=3&t=408351&p=9122756#p9122756


You didn’t just say “tolerate.” You said “forced to tolerate.” If you said “forced to accept,” that wouldn’t sound good either.


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Joe90
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31 Aug 2022, 8:00 pm

Twilightprincess wrote:
Joe90 wrote:
Sorry, I thought "tolerate" was another word for "accept". That was what I was using it as anyway.

Then people wonder why I write threads like this:

viewtopic.php?f=3&t=408351&p=9122756#p9122756


You didn’t just say “tolerate.” You said “forced to tolerate.” If you said “forced to accept,” that wouldn’t sound good either.


Why do people get so hung up on words?
OK then, politically obliged to accept.


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RetroGamer87
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31 Aug 2022, 9:56 pm

I'm even pickier. For my next relationship I'm going to exclude literally everyone.


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kraftiekortie
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31 Aug 2022, 10:45 pm

What’s wrong with non-binary people who just live their lives?



Joe90
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31 Aug 2022, 10:53 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
What’s wrong with non-binary people who just live their lives?


Nothing but I just don't get it, that's all. Nothing against the individuals. But I don't want to derail this thread with my dumb political opinions so let's all just drop it now.


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kraftiekortie
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31 Aug 2022, 10:54 pm

Age is just a number……



Joe90
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31 Aug 2022, 10:59 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
Age is just a number……


That's true.

But there will always be some people who just can't handle the fact that a 32-year-old is going out with a 60-year-old. That's OK, I can't expect everyone to accept everything, as long as they don't criticise me personally or go "ugh that's gross, find someone your own age!"

People aren't obliged to accept everything, as long as they're not making their point by bullying a person for their differences. If someone said "I don't understand how people can date someone twice their age" I wouldn't take it as a personal insult, as people are entitled to have their views just like I'm entitled to date a man twice my age, but if they said "you are disgusting and weird dating a man of that age" then I would take offense.

It's all about meeting halfway really. It's a judgemental world, people will judge, it's life.


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31 Aug 2022, 11:15 pm

Well I supposed it goes for accepting others for other things as well. Like for example, my friend recently got married and when some of my other friends saw his wedding pictures online, some said, that they were surprised that he chose a woman who is obese... But I was thinking, don't judge, we fall for who we fall for...



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01 Sep 2022, 1:16 am

Joe90 wrote:
I just don't get it


That's clear


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