Need help on getting over crush.

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Maxx
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06 Oct 2007, 10:36 pm

This worked for a friend of mine: Write down your feelings for this guy on a piece of paper. Then rip it to shreds. I personally don't see how this works well, but it worked for her. Who knows?



Joybob
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06 Oct 2007, 10:44 pm

I've had the same feelings for an old crush for over a decade. You may as well get used to the fact that you might never get over it.



calandale
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06 Oct 2007, 11:39 pm

'Tis funny. As soon as I'm certain that
they're not interested, my own interest
dies. Not entirely, at least if I'm idiotic
enough to fall in love (as is always the
case, 'twould seem), but enough that
it becomes just a faint thought.



lonelyLady
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06 Oct 2007, 11:39 pm

I can totally understand you. this thing happened to me to, except it wasn't as bad because we don't work together. He was my friend, and he would say or do things that made me thing he liked me, but then days later he would act like he doesn't give a damn about me. I hate how men play with your heart. I wish men would stop doing it. Sorry, I don't have any good advice. I need a good advice myself... Perhaps accepting your feelings is the best option.



BigTimeSynesthete
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14 Oct 2007, 5:52 pm

Oh my gosh, last year i got obsessed with a gay guy! He was really nice and fun to hang out with, but every time i saw him, my face turned red. :oops: I bet he noticed it. Luckly, he didn't say anything regarding it. but my gosh, it would have been a beautiful friendship if only i could control myself. Because of this, i rarely hung out with him, and before i got a second chance, he moved somewhere else. This was a screwed up friendship, indeed. At least i learned my lesson. most guys that are really nice like he was, are probably going to turn out gay.

You cannot blame me, because before I knew him, most of the guys i met were either utter a**holes or ignored my presence entirely. I never met a guy who would try to get those he didn't know the slightest bit, engaged in a long conversation. I mean i was just minding my own buisiness waiting for my next class, and suddenly a guy walks by saying "hey! are you new to this school?" I could say that he was the opposite of autistic. heh, opposites attract :lol:


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Spot17
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14 Oct 2007, 6:44 pm

I guess I'm lucky in this regard. When I know someone is gay or married or in a relationship, I'm incapable of liking them romantically (I have pretty good gaydar too). In fact, the sure way for me to stop liking someone is for them to get a girlfriend. It's not instantaneous and it does hurt but it's a hell of a lot faster process for me to get over them than if I just wait to stop naturally.

I don't see an end to this, I like this guy too much. I keep trying to find qualities about him that turn me off and it's not working. All I feel lately is anger and frustration over this and I'm really sick of it. I'm pretty unhappy at my job anyway; I've decided it's time to find a new one.



jkrane
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14 Oct 2007, 10:14 pm

I used drugs back in the day to get rid of my obsessional crushes...I don't reccommend it though. It's a sh***y way to live your life.



Tim_Tex
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15 Oct 2007, 6:26 am

(hugs Spot17)

Tim


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shadexiii
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15 Oct 2007, 7:51 am

jkrane wrote:
I used drugs back in the day to get rid of my obsessional crushes...I don't reccommend it though. It's a sh***y way to live your life.

QFT



Wolfpup
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16 Oct 2007, 2:07 pm

It kind of sounds like he's giving mixed messages. I guess just let him make a move, since he's the one who blew you off. If we was interested in you, he probably would have done SOMETHING, or at least he'd offer that he wants to do something with you.

Wish I could tell you what to do emotionally to get rid of thinking about it. I can't completely disconnect myself from my ex-fiancee emotionally :(

shadexiii wrote:
AnonymousAnonymous wrote:
One day, the correct person will come to you.
Don't go to them. Let them come to you.


To be honest, I used to view this as complete nonsense. "Wait, I should just sit here until someone great comes along?"


That's my only strategy :? No, I don't actually expect it to work, but it's all I've got.

lonelyLady wrote:
I can totally understand you. this thing happened to me to, except it wasn't as bad because we don't work together. He was my friend, and he would say or do things that made me thing he liked me, but then days later he would act like he doesn't give a damn about me. I hate how men play with your heart. I wish men would stop doing it. Sorry, I don't have any good advice. I need a good advice myself... Perhaps accepting your feelings is the best option.


That's interesting to hear that, because I've always thought it would be the other way around-women would do that more than men. Maybe it's just my perspective because I'm a guy and don't have a clue what I'm doing when it comes to this stuff.



Sedaka
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16 Oct 2007, 3:45 pm

i recommend NOT taking a job with them.......

yeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah


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BigTimeSynesthete
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16 Oct 2007, 8:35 pm

Spot17 wrote:
I guess I'm lucky in this regard. When I know someone is gay or married or in a relationship, I'm incapable of liking them romantically (I have pretty good gaydar too). In fact, the sure way for me to stop liking someone is for them to get a girlfriend. It's not instantaneous and it does hurt but it's a hell of a lot faster process for me to get over them than if I just wait to stop naturally.


I actually have a pretty good gaydar too, now that i've been exposed to a lot of gays in my art program. Besides, my liking for that gay guy was more about getting overly attached to him as a really good friend than wanting to get physically romantic with him. but i was so afriad that he'd think i liked him, because obviously, it looked like that. I don't usually get attracted to boys that have girlfriends, though.


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