Pretty, popular girls...

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How about you give these girls a chance instead of just assuming they're going to find all of these other people more important than you?

OMGPOPULAR=BAD wrong. Stop being as close minded as you seem to think these girls aer.

I would appreciate it if people stopped making false assumptions.

I always give them a chance, and I always keep pressing on. It's just been all too common for girls I liked to always be busy with other people and other friends.

Like I said, being pretty and being popular do Not automatically go hand in hand! Pretty girls often do have people approaching them; but personality is something that people are born with-especially extroversion vs. introversion. You're assumption that pretty girls are automatically extroverted and popular is patently false.

Have any of you ever considered the Feline effect with attractive women? On top of that being a dynamic of numbers. Just like cats they are initially attracted to the men with confidence who don't pay any attention to them. Ive been dating one of those attractive/popular for 8 months now. Never gave her too much attention when we first met just kept the talk on the phone real short and "sigh" always acted like I was in a hurry. I know it sounds rude haha but if you're on the phone with a girl setting up a date just small talk for a few minutes then just end the conversation out of the blue "Ie. I gotta get on this or that but hey wanna get drinks at so and so" My girl told me she was attracted to me cause I was always aloof and unpredictable rather than trying to kiss her ass and compliment her left and right like everyone else (I never told her that she was beautiful until knowing her for four months!). Now she forcing me to say those "I luv you" words and discussing marriage while I tell her Im in no hurry slow down.

The poor girl gets hit on all the time. Every time I leave her alone at the bar there is some guy telling her how lovely she is (Even guys that are bigger, buffer, and better looking than I am). You know what she tells me? He was to nice, to clingy, or boring and that she found it was creepy and she was not comfortable around them. She signals me over so the guy goes away. haha And if the guy is pretty cool I just go up and join the conversation with them and he gets the message that she's mine. Most of those girls don't want to be pampered or given any special attention they like getting riled up, thrown off their equilibrium, playfully teased, and have fun. Whats works for some doesnt always work for others I just know what works for me . I hope this opens your head up to "hot" girl mentality They dont make any sense but that the way they are cause you dont make any sense to them either. If you like a girl tell her right away about your abnormalities (IE No comprehension of Body language!)

But that's the thing. SEX is always on our minds. Attraction is SEX.

I know it's weird to think of it that way but it's the truth.

If you just want her to be a friend then don't even worry about anything.

Go up to her and say Hi. That's it. If you can't muster up the courage to say hi you certainly will never meet her.

Oh and the only reason I said it wasn't exclusive to AS guys was to make you feel less worried on the subject. I was just relaying to you what works for me. Realizing I am not the only one always makes me feel less worried about things.

Well, I was long attracted to someone epitomizing this concept. By long, I mean over a decade. Actually, it's exactly the sort of thing that causes aspies to wonder if they're in love or just obsessing, especially considering the long-term one-sided interest.

What happened eventually, other than thoroughly alienating her, is that I started to realize she represented the perfect mix of normalcy and exceptionalism that the society I grew up in so valued. It causes me to think that I was just interested in the legitimization that such a relationship might have brought moreso than the person. Perhaps this is common for aspies, especially those with no idea as to their AS status or that Asperger's even exists, to pursue the normalcy that eternally eludes them, especially in such an idealized area as romance.

My attraction to her type, there were others after high school that were variations on that theme, is over now, but only because I hold the character of such individuals as deeply suspect. Not saying that's healthy, but believe me when you don't trust a particular type you don't fall for that type anymore.

-Frank

Of course, I've been on this forum a while, this topic's come up plenty of times.

One thing I don't get about it, now that I think about it, is that...how is it that you're supposed to pretend not to care about a girl...but still be the one to approach her? I guess it's like hooking them, then pulling it away. Well, I've tried that too, they never lift a finger to persue. They're too busy to!

Hmm Yeah that is pretty strange... Sounds like you are doing the right things. I guess I would have to see you in action to comment any further! Too bad u dont live anywhere near Oklahoma my gf could help ya out. Body language is one of the largest things you might be inadvertently sending them an odd signal or something. I dunno as i said I cant really comment until I see u on the prowl . If you have a friend thats really suave with girls... Or even that fat idiot friend that everybody loves. Ask if you can go hang out/socialize with them. hehe Find out what their magic is. If nothing else they can point people towards you.

i hate them, well not really hate coz i don't know them personally, i just don't like these social pecking order ....when i was still in school i always despised these rich popular pretty girls simply because they were mean and judgmental they have this superiority air which annoys me alot...