I have never been on a date. How do I attract a guy?

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As you can see, a female posting a request on this board will pretty much assure one.

Sadly, a lot of them live far from me though

I think a good start would be to look for people you think you might connect with.

In what way? Like special interests?

Exactly.

Awesome! I sent you a PM if you'd like to chat.



The women's signals are usually very subtle. A certain look. Sitting in a certain way that signifies she is open to being approached, etc. I don't read body language very well (aspie, lol) so I can't describe them to you. But there is a flirting guide floating out here on the Love and Dating forum that might help.



No problem. Hope it was helpful.

LovableNerd, I have sent you a PM too.

Tell me about it... I actually have a thing for glasses... Also, since in nerd culture, as well as in aspergers syndrome, males significantly outnumber females, you can get nearly any type of guy you want.

PS: are you closer to the eastern half or western half of pennsylvania?

Ahh, pleased to meet another fellow Pennsylvanian. What area do you live in by the way? I live near Hershey. If you ever want to talk you're welcome to.

As for advice...from what I've noticed and also how I operate to a degree, the guy will generally go out of his why to talk to you and be around you. If he asks you for his number then even better, although not everybody can muster up the guts to do that. Then I've heard that guys like to wait a few days to call after actually getting the girl's number, you know, to spark her curiosity as to why he hasn't called her immediately. I kind of think that's BS, but I guess that's because I'm impatient. lol

And incidentally, my best friend's favorite movies are the Star Wars films. One of his favorite music groups is even called the "Jedi Mind Tricks." He's a diehard cinema buff and loves anime too. And he likes transformers, among other things. And he's actually around your age. I believe he'll be turning 27 this summer. I also suspect that he has Asperger's as he has exhibited many of the signs, and he and I seem to share many similar personality traits. That's why I get along with him the best. Plus, he's single! Unfortunately, he doesn't have a car though.

Eastern half. I live close to Delaware.

I have never been out on a date. I know guys send signals out to ladies that they are interested in, but I don't know what they are. Or if guys have been actually sending out signals at all.

It really depends on the guy, but if a guy is paying a lot of attention to you, he's interested. Usually the signals are more obvious than that, my advice is to watch chimps flirt, humans (especially NTs) tend to engage in the same kind of posturing and casual touching as their primate cousins. Aspies are different because many of us are weird about being touched by NT standards. No offense, but I am shocked that you have never been on a date.

I am 28, I have shoulder-length slightly curly light brown hair, and grey blue eyes. I am 5'0", but I am unsure of my weight. (the scale we have is not very accurate)

Should attract guys, no problems there. Are you from a small town, by any chance? I am from a small-er town (17,000), and I had problems dating for a long time, then a six year relationship, then nothing. The less people, the lower the odds of meeting someone compatible enough to date.

I like Star Wars and Transformers.

Excuse me if this comes across as flip, but this so matches a 28 year old guy who has never been on a date. Find him and you'll find your first date. Just kidding, but I like Star Wars, and I love the old-school, hand-drawn Transformers, I even watched some Beast Wars in my young adulthood. You ever hang out where like-minded men are found? There is nothing like being noticed to generate clear signals.

I don't wear makeup, and I wear glasses. My eyes are Oriental looking, and I have a big butt. But I am not heavy.

PM me?

I look like I am quite young, I look 17. Many people have told me that I am quite pretty, and that I have a "figure."

Does he need to look like a steroid user, drive a Ferrari, or adopt an obscure faith? Speaking only for myself, but unless you have tentacles for limbs... just about perfect.

I have had guys interested in me before, mostly NTs, but I have mostly turned them down because at that time I was not interested in dating.

Why weren't you interested in dating before? Dating is a silly game of testing how much two people like each other. Exchanging of compliments, asking of questions, and the parts that are good to know before getting involved can often be learned beforehand in casual conversation, but it can be tricky. If there is some initial spark, if the conversation extends beyond the socially convenient, consider a date, it isn't like he has to become a boyfriend, eat dinner or watch a movie together, beats sitting at home - unless it doesn't. It's the opposite of War Games - the only way to lose is not to play the game.

Now that I am, what are the signals a guy sends out when they are interested? And how does a girl respond if she's interested?

Ask questions, listen to the answers, answer questions, listen, ask, tell, make out. Extra attention is the number one sign. People may pay attention to people they would not necessarily pursue, but people never pursue people without heaping on the attention.

How do you attract a guy? Write a compellingly sexy post.

Your experience with Men is equivalent to my experience Women.

Judging by your avatar, you also like free software. (who doesn't?) ;)

I don't really know about the body language but, I would watch a Movie or TV show where there are two people going "ga-ga" over one another and watch what they do.

Online dating.

**checking the OP's gender**

juliekitty is right, try online dating.

ps: use a photo.

Online dating isn't the real thing.
Try to find someone whilst doing some past time activity.
At some workplaces you can also be successfull but be weary of implications.
At my work my 2 managers have a relationship, wich is kind of funny.
If all of those out of your house place don't yield any result than try online dating.
BUT, find someone within a 20 mile radius so the relationship doesn't break up over the distance.
I've been there and done that, needing to spend 15 euros on gas everytime you want to see your girlfriend can be quite a pain.
At the time i could barely afford to see her once a week, the traveling time also was a pain.

I can't say i'm a great expert on what every guy likes.
But going to the gym or anything other to get lots of physical exercise does wonders for attracting a guy.
Decent clothing is also a must for attracting guys, you have to show you care about it.
Hygene is just as important, make sure you shower every day put on deodorant and some kind of odor.
Personnally i like women with long straight hair but that's just me.

When it comes to a date itself and given you are interested and want to show him i have some tips.
Smile alot, ask questions about the guy, give compliments, let him take the lead.
Let's face it the only women i've known to take innitiative, were the ones that just wanted to get laid and never see you again.

Do something unexpected. Hit him, make fun of him a bit, make him uneasy, then BAM, grab him while he is unprepared.