Break News: Mccain's 17 years old secret mistress!

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Never spit in your face - not sure where that is coming from. What I am trying to say is that my process is a little different - think of it as prequalification, if that helps. Through finding ways and consistent effort, I talk to a lot of people. When I was younger, I asked a lot of people out and got rejected overwhelmingly. In fact, with one exception, the only relationships I had when I was in my teens that had any sort of life were those that were initiated by the interest of the girl - not my own. But I kept trying. Now that I'm older, I make more platonic plans with people than dates, and being involved with someone right now... it just isn't even something I have to consider.

Was it a little harsh? Perhaps, but again, much less that I have seen earlier this year with yourself, Zane, Dracula, et al, about the essence of personality. Even my own vitriol can be more pointed than that. Yes, it can be read in a dismissive tone, but I think that may be intended albeit not to the level it is felt - to pass judgment on women and relationships on the basis of twelve attempts is too small of a sample to be a relative value. If that mentality were pervasive, we'd likely still be using candles today.


M.

[edit] Full quote, for context: "I did talk to tens if not into the hundreds in an effort to understand, to keep trying, to learn. In the past ten years? I might ask out a couple women a year, if I was not involved otherwise." [/edit]

Last edited by makuranososhi on 19 Sep 2008, 6:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I guess I've just tried to get to know some and well asking them out no but it's hard for me just to get to know them well enough to talk to them regularly about anything.

Actually the advice didn't strike me as lacking compassion so much as it seemed misleading. I once knew a teenage guy with AS who told me that he "asked out" something like 56 girls in three weeks during a summer course and got rejected every time. I don't recall thinking that he was that bad looking either, but I imagine he only had one quick conversation and then said something like "alright, so would you like to go out with me?". It's the only way I can imagine such a feat taking place.

Asking out 12 girls in an entire lifetime, let alone over the course of a year, seems like a monumental challenge to me from where I am now. Maybe that will change in a couple months when I'm old enough to drink, get into the bar scene and see if the old "artificial courage" does anything for me.

When I say "insensitive" I mean that guys stop caring about how they come across to women, and don't respect their opinions, feelings, etc. I'm saying that a lot of guys (not all) end up like this due to being constantly rejected. It makes you really "numb" after awhile. I've seen it happen. Of course, you have to be somewhat predisposed to being a jerk... but if you're taught that being a jerk is the only thing that works, how are you supposed to know any better?


So have I, thanks to some moron who decided to ask a girl out "for" me. Her response (and I quote): "I would rather eat cockroaches."

one does not have to like the mods or creators of the site
just because they made it or rule over it

well, I am "numb" about this actually, but I don't think I could be a jerk, rather very naive and easily to take advantage of, but it depends how people think of being insensitive or sensitive, I mean, if I happen to not be a romantic type or faling to say the correct nicest words then I could be seen as insensitive I feel, as I would think of it more like social skills and tactics to finally get laid , even if it is with honesty.


Well, that is why I don't care and I don't want to have a relationship, I try to avoid that, but I think that is due to social phobia, that and from observing other couples, when they fight for stupid things or break up and related problems, I tend to feel like I am better off alone, after all.

Yea, my own saliva liquor , wanna drink?

not to be mean but a girl won't want to be with someone who doesn't have the balls to ask anyone out. You complain about how it's scary but why the hell do you take it personally when people say no? Thats their issue, not yours. If you're dependent on other peoples reactions to you, then you need to work on improving your self esteem. I've had chicks flake out tons of times but I've had girlfriends because I'm not afraid to man up and ask girls to *gasp* do something with me.

Last edited by alex on 20 Sep 2008, 1:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I don't know, some girls seem to like shy guys.

Even the girls that like shy guys don't want a guy who b*****s all the time about how hard it is to ask girls out.

I take it personally because it's personal. They are rejecting me personally.



I bitched about it once. Guilty. But not "all the time", and certainly not in the presence of any girls I would prospectively want to ask out.

And more importantly, I'm working on it. It's hard for me now, but I'm working on it. I'm not resigning myself to being alone.

lets put it this way: how many people have you asked out and in what time frame?

Last edited by 0_equals_true on 20 Sep 2008, 4:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.

saliva liquor? no thanks!.

I am impressed , alex you usally visit this section once per year yet you popped-up in less than 24 hours in this thread. It seems that you have bot ears in every corner of this site. XD


alex, I am curious , is this how you got your current special girlfriend? by using the shotgun method (refer to Toad's post)?

I am against Toad's way tho (waiting for months and months in order to know the girl very well before asking) but at least you have to know the girl a bit before and to develop a crush at least toward the girl first.

I noticed that Aspie are usually the shy lover type and develop a crush before asking the girl out but you are too different , how fast your crush development? 5 milliseconds?

And how fast you recover after a rejection? after hours maybe?

....and you don't have a standard mini-list of 1 to 2 conditions at least?

...and how may girls you asked per year before your relationship? Oh btw , 'asking out a girl' is not equal to 'flirt a girl' or 'talk to a girl' , I flirt girls daily.

Last edited by LePetitPrince on 20 Sep 2008, 4:50 pm, edited 1 time in total.

What is bitching? is it a correct term used accurately? or a term used out of being annoyed?

Anyway, I suppose a girl wouldn't like that, but if they don't notice the "bitching", then they wouldn't know, I mean, in my view I assume that it would not be a good idea for a guy to "b***h" about this infront of girls, however if they do it privately, with a friend or among just guys it would be different. And well, "bitching" would be like ranting, isn't it? I mean, I don't think ranting about a situation to be forbidden, after all, here in this site, we have a Haven forum, however, I see that all should be in proper place.