Angel_Maria wrote:
I say coping but i mean trying to understand.
My partner is very overpowering and it feels like he forces his opinions on me. For example today i said to him about agirl i had read in the paper who killed her boyfriend and he turned round to me and stubbonly said "Do you really think that any of this is true" i did not answer him as i have realised that now if i answer him it turns into a massive argument.
Also he can never seem to let a subject drop even when i say to him after he has been talking non stop for 30 mins that it was the end of discussion he will continue to have his say. We was round my mums house the other day when this happened again. I was not responding because it was my mums house and i did not want to argue round there. I said to him end of discussion as the argument was with him and his mate and i some how got dragged into it. I mean right now he is looking through some mags and is commenting on almost every story and just being so critical of everything including me on many occasions.
The relationship was perfect in the start we both cared and looked after each other and was just so caring and we would chat about things and talk for ages with each other and almost like switching off a light he changed. No warning it all changed.
Now i have tried my best by reading others posts and experiences and i still cant understand him. He blames everything on his aspergers. I love him to bits but i get so angry with him because he just does not seem to care about me he talks down to me a lot like he is better than me and it upsets me.
I dont want to leave him but i cant put up with it much more.
Am i being selfish or is there anything i can do to make our relationship better?
Ok first off, was it a paper as in newspaper, or one of those few paged glossy gossip magazines about and for everyday people where the front page is emblazoned with headlines such as "My father raped me then ate the dog"?
If that was the case, then I entirely endorse his right to point out that it is all bull.
You seem to be very selective with what you rememer about him. You seem to be only focusing on the negative and discarding the positive.
I agree with the others in the idea that there was a honeymoon period, and you are beginning to get to know each other. I personally believe you need to think about the difference between what you PERCEIVE and what IS.
For example, his "blaming everything on his aspergers", he might not be. You may be perceiving things differently than they actually are.
Once you start seeing things for how they are, you will notice that your boyfriend isn't the monster that you paint him out to be.
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"We can spend the rest of our existences stomping on the ants that are mysteriously coming out from under the refridgerator, or we can remove the spoiled food behind it which is causing the infestation to begin with." - Peter Joseph
25 Jan 2009, 9:37 pm
