zen_mistress wrote:
Laz wrote:
I'm of the school of thought that says quality wins over quantity in vocalising discourse. The right time and the right place to make such points not constant points of contention. Basically pick your battles that are worth fighting over. Therefore when you come to deliver the feedback the weight is more sufficient and taken more seriously then simply dismissed as part of your normal demenour, the constant emission of noise that comes with the presence of your person. But i guess if your a tolerant type you tend to take such things with a pinch of salt they don't really registere as annoying in the mind. What annoys one person will be perfectly grand to the next, so its simply down to you as an individual.
I guess that is more an introvert's way of doing things. It is a lot easier to pick your battles and plan what you are going to say when you dont feel compelled to say a lot.
I feel as if I am going to explode if I dont express myself, especially if something is bothering me. But I have learnt in the past few years, that of course that is not possible and will get me into a whole lot of trouble, so I have to keep things to myself if I dont want to alienate others.
I dont know if I have really changed on the inside, but I guess I have become a bit more indifferent to things that bother me, and that helps.
I would say it's also the strategy of someone who isn't quick witted (i.e. me) if you don't have the ability to instantly respond to retort then your at a disadvantage in such confrontations, especially if the other person is quick witted. When I was younger I would be lead on to agree with things that when I thought about in more detail I did not actually agree with. Without the safety net of assertivly holding your ground you are quite vulnerable to being mislead by such people who play to their strengths and your weaknesses
Tolerance is fine when its balanced. When its unbalanced its compromise and compromising to the point you are submitting or putting up with things against your will isn't healthy.
There are pros and cons to being an extreme of either an introvert or extrovert. I would like to externalise my thoughts more often it would probably do wonders for my mental health and well being. But its a slow path to begin to learn to do something like that. The progress i've made in 5 years was through being forced into situations through trainning in a professional field. Wasn't my comfort zone but the experianced forced me to grow in a more healthy and productive direction.
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"Tall people can be recognized by three things: generosity in the design, humanity in the execution and moderation in success"
31 Mar 2011, 4:36 am
So I hate when people generalize and automatically think I'm lazy. Far from it.
