Some very basic dating tips

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the high suicide rate of men says otherwise. death is death. starve to death, shot to death, fall to death, drown to death. you're still dead. but suppose if you're talking solely about keeping one's body living without any care to mental health then yess all one needs is some food bars, water and a tarp. the govt should take over and provide everyone with food bars, water and tarp. but more to living than just sustaining the breathing of air. theres a reason while surviving on a deserted island is called surviving not living. life without living is just pointless sustaining for no reason. perhaps why all living creatures have fun things. foxes for example get recorded playing with trampolines and balls. even wild animals need fun to keep living. not sure why it is humans are expected to not need it.

so you don't need relationships to survive, but you sure as hell do for your mental health, or at least most people do.

sex is often part of that for a lot of people as it is very emotional connecting and fun. otherwise I'd assumed it'd be cheaper for rich people to buy a fleshlight rather then spend thousands of dollars with prostitutes.

You've refuted your own argument. You don't raspberries more often because they're expensive. Sex is not expensive to you as a woman. I mean, hell, you're the ones who charge us for sex, figuratively or literally.

At best, that can serve as an explanation as to why women evolved into less sexual beings than men, it certainly doesn't disprove any of my points. Studies show that access to contraceptives have no visible impact on women's sex lives or their sex habits.

Last edited by Gauldoth on 07 Jun 2015, 6:23 am, edited 1 time in total.

It just reflects how the world has become: The more hungry you are the less food you will have. The hornier you are the less sex you will have.

Nah, that's just what people tell themselves to feel better. Fact of the matter is, whether or not you get food is largely dependent on factors outside your control, there are a few things you can do to try and maximize your chances of getting, but again it's largely gonna come down to outside factors. Ditto for sex (if you're a guy).

I'd say it's more internal factors than external ones beyond your control - in both cases.

Food - in our economy you need money to obtain it, either that or hunt/gather/grow your own. Either way, you need YOU to be functioning well enough to be able to obtain food. Mentally, physically, neurologically capable of either working for money or to produce or obtain your own food. It doesn't matter what other people are doing or not doing, it's on you to do what you Need to to get what you Want.

Same goes for sex. There aren't other people out there expending their time and energy to prevent you from getting sex. Perhaps trying to get it for themselves instead of you getting it, yes, but there aren't outside forces working against you. It's your own internal thoughts, emotions, actions etc that may constrain you from getting sex. Change those things and your ability to get laid improves just as one's ability to earn money improves.

I'm going to be very very blunt with this next statement. It's aspie traits that can be the biggest cock block ever. I say can, because I know someone on the spectrum that I've had a massive crush on & I'd date them if I were their type, but that's extremely rare. Most all other aspies are not what I would ever consider relationship material. There was one I hooked up with (diagnosed and self aware of his diagnosis) once who then complained that he couldn't get a second date/hookup with anyone.. I never said why I wasn't interested but the reality is that he was so robotically aspie we just had nothing in common. Then there's another occasional fwb aspie who's symptoms have gotten worse over time. The last time we hung out he was just a little too... weird for my liking & I dunno if we'll ever spend much time together again tbh.

I pick up on others AS traits more and more now that I've managed to treat and minimize my own. IMO, if you want to have relationship or sexual success you've got to be willing to do the hard work required to get yourself as happy & healthy as possible. FYI, I make more money now so food is easily obtained. I'm infinitely better in terms of mental/neurological/social health and sex is pretty easily obtained if I want it. Granted, as disclosed, it's way way easier for a gay guy to get laid.. but still, both the quality and quantity of partners is far better than it ever was should I choose to hookup with someone. None of this is a secret, either. I've shared on WP what I've done to treat & improve myself via diet, detox/cleanses, supplements and probiotics. If you're interested in the details, feel free to pm me.

If people kill themselves over not getting their dick wet they're pathetic.

Sex for me is the same "price" as it is for the other person, or as close as possible. If you are talking about things like a man having to buy me dinner or some crap like that before I'll sleep with him, that's just not true. And we both get the same thing out of it - sex! Something we - wait for it - both want!

Fixed this for you.

not bad ! you can pick some you like

not too caring and understanding towards depressed lonely people I see, oh well they dead so they don't need to care about what you think anymore. I remember you being more nice in past times though.

just because you don't care about sex and emotional connections doesn't mean its not very important to others.

I never said anything about being lonely. I was talking about sex. If you want sex, you're horny, not lonely.

And I've been clinically depressed, so don't try the "more depressed than you" card on me, please.

Makes sense as sex is not just "having fun". People mostly do it because the desire is innate and hardwired, and thus contraceptives or not should make little difference.

for me the two are very much one. I don't want sex with just anyone, it's very emotional bonding for me. so I'm lonely and I get horny which just makes me more lonely. wasn't trying that card on you. just seems like you are down playing other peoples depression because it is different then yours. which I don't think is very nice.

so you trying to say lonely people don't want sex and those who want sex can't be lonely? again different people you probably can't understand.

That's an... interesting comment for a moderator on a forum for a group of people who both suffer from a disproportionately high suicide and depression rate, and who often list their inability to find a mate as one of the main reasons behind both, if not the only one. Then again, you're a "lady aspie", so I didn't really expect you to understand.

Last edited by Gauldoth on 08 Jun 2015, 3:40 am, edited 1 time in total.

I see your point. For me sex and love are two different things.

Gauldoth, "not getting your dick wet" is a different thing from not being able to find a partner. If you think that sex is all there is to a relationship, perhaps you have some growing up to do.
And yes, I can get laid. It solves nothing.