"Just be friendly."

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"just be friendly" means f*****g nothing.
I'm never friendly because people tend to be "something" and I get angry if they are the wrong thing.
I get angry if they are not respectful or they laugh at my weird way of doing.
I get angry and I become very enraged if people disrespect me and if females don't want to hang out with me anymore.

"friendly" is too vague

The counselor has to tell you, correct actions and statements

What one person finds "friendly" someone else does not

For example, compliments

*face palm*

First: Marknis, what do you think of what your therapist told you? Does it make sense to you? What were you hoping to seek from us by telling us what she said?

Regards to other things said in this thread:

Typically you do not go to a therapist specifically for dating advice, that is not apart of their job description. Saying somebody should get a new therapist and a male one because of this is ridiculous. If that's all someone is after then you're are better off going to a dating expert/life coach.

There's truth in this, however it's rather simplistic. If the horse won't drink it simply may not be thirsty; but as I gather this has been going on a long time, so we know the horse is thirsty. If you have a thirsty horse that won't drink the question to be asked is, WHY? You can blame the horse, but that doesn't solve the problem. You check for dehydration, you dump the water, clean the trough, put fresh water in. Still no go? Does the water taste funny? Is the horse sick? Does it have a tooth issue? So if all you do is stand there and tell the horse to drink you are of course, just going to get frustrated.

In this, it generally seems to me that people like to offer up solutions and answers to questions Marknis hasn't actually asked. My perspective is that he is seeking something that previous responses hasn't given answer to. It's important to remember that change can take time, it's a process.

This technically is not Marknis's fault as many therapists will claim they can work with all types personal problems (which I have discovered through experience they can't). Often the they are searching for an opportunity to help the client/patient become self-aware of obstacles. When talk-therapy works it's largely because it triggers the client's motivation (like a placebo) and then of course the client thinks it's some type of magic from the therapist when in reality it's the client making the connection themselves.

Last edited by cyberdad on 08 Jun 2019, 8:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.

This technically is not Marknis's fault as many therapists will claim they can work with all types personal problems (which I have discovered through experience they can't). Often the they are searching for an opportunity to help the client/patient become self-aware of obstacles. When talk-therapy works it's largely because it triggers the client's motivation (like a placebo) and then of course the client thinks it's some type of magic from the therapist when in reality it's the client making the connection themselves.[/quote]




The statement is correct

But the counselors field is the Diagnosic statistical manual,, not relationships and emotions

A counselor told me that

Not many things fall neatly into the DSM




When counselors discuss relationship and emotion, their statement are just as biased and amateur, as everyone else's statement

The important thing is that counselors are subject to exactly the same biases toward the client as the general population. SOmetimes it's more effective when a parent counsels their child.

In my experience, counseling has been very beneficial.

I think you need to be lucky with counseling

Case in point

The counselor explained to a parent the risks of parenting a child with downs syndrome
https://www.kidspot.com.au/parenting/re ... bd8aac9447

But afterward the counselor tells the parents ‘You might want to think about termination,’

This is the counselor doing the wrong thing...applying their own bias on the parents, luckily the parents did the exact opposite and now have a beautiful son

Counselors make the same wrong assumptions as everyone else:



They are perfect

They deserve to be happy at all times to get whatever they want

The client must and will believe whatever the counselor says


talking is necessary at all times

everything is either "cool" or "sucks"

you need their consent

you find your life "interesting"

vague statements

Globalization

Double standards

Well, hopefully, people aren’t going to do whatever someone else tells them to.

Interacting with someone in person can be very beneficial, especially when it comes to social stuff.

I can’t know exactly how Marknis carries himself in social situations, unlike someone who talks to him in person.

Counselors have education, training, and certification that most of us lack.

Twilight princess

The statement is correct

But some counselors, like Jamie Adair and Jeanne Courtney, acted like they knew a lot more than they knew

They were closeminded to learning more

They treated me like I knew much less than I did

Sometimes, their education is unnecessary or insufficient to "help" the client

The counselors field is the Diagnosic statistical manual, not emotion and relationship

For example, Jeanne Courtney told me that it was not "kind" for Amy Lee scheel b***h to dogsit when she knew I was coming over. A priority



That statement is just as amateur as everyone else's statement


Chaplain Anthony Rodgers had the nerve to tell me that "we would rather not have you doing yoga. It's distracting"


Lemmie guess:. Graduate Theological Union had a question on the midterm. "What is the correct method of approaching someone wrongfully doing unskillful yoga?"

Model answer:. " We would rather not have you doing yoga. It's distracting."





Seriously

f**k Anthony Rodgers


His statement was correct


But "we would rather not have you continue living. It's distracting" is also correct




Everything is "would rather have", neither or "would rather have"

There are only three groups

There are seven billion dollars in the world

Each group contains more than two people

Hence "we"

Logical fallacy








Quite frankly, STEM is better in that way









A counselor told me that "counseling can help"

Correct



But counseling can "help", neither or "hurt"


"Can", "should", and "will", are all different







And even if it "helps", it is not worth 75 bucks








f**k Jamie Adair b***h


Berkeley city college counselor

Now since you’ve mentioned them by name, Marknis knows not to go to those ones.

If a therapist isn’t beneficial, a person should try someone else.

Apart from this issue centered around dating, Marknis may benefit in other ways by going to counseling (like working on depression).

In theory this gives assurances to a potential client. In practice counselors tend to rely on on generic responses to a client which they learn from i) textbooks and ii) imitating a senior counselor. This is alright when the problem is mild and non-pathological perhaps linked to the client needing somebody to hold their hand and give them positive affirmation which can improve outcomes as the client is made to feel comfortable, CBT for example only works when there is a therapuetic relationship where the client fully trusts the therapist.

However, mild issues/concerns can also be assisted by a life coach who is also trained in exactly the same form of positive psychology, holding the client's hand and making them aware of gaps in their awareness etc...they also charge 50% less

For most people with moderate to severe issues (linked to diagnosed disorders) talk therapy is a placebo/illusion. Infact psychologists are generally persuaded to refer clients who show pathology to a doctor or psychiatrist who might need to prescribe medication.

You say that like the depression is a separate entity to the lack of dating, as if there is no link at all.