Who are the Self Proclaimed Nice Guys here?

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I totally agree that this has been completely on topic, I think your posts have been incredibly important and insightful.

Check your pockets, I nicked your wallet while I hugged you -evil laugh-

Last edited by salamandaqwerty on 09 Mar 2014, 5:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Oh you! I was trying to make you blush

i really get this. my father was completely cold and unloving towards my sister and i, to the point of cruelty when he was angry--yet he was always loving and easily affectionate with cats, and i do believe it was genuine. it's like, that was the extent of what he was capable of in regards to caring relationships. i NEVER saw the same easy affection in him with people, with any sort of people.

anyway yeah, it's never completely black and white, not in the human sphere.

Hey, if I get a vote, salamdaqwerty is a genuinely nice guy, A++, would totally get to know in person.

also, i second this.

ooh, and this too

aw shucks *blushes*
thanks you guys!

and ditto

Hey! That's one of my old tricks.

I've heard a lot of that all too much :'( I am tired of how people protect the abusers, my sperm donors mom still defends him for stuff he did, and his dad is defended by his children for what he did/does to them. Even know the state does nothing to help ms brother who's wife abuses him(he won't tell)
you're best friend wasn't a friend. no true friend would say that.
whats socially acceptable? I don't think there's criteria for getting sympathy, at least not from me.
one thing that bothers me about some abused people is how they go and interact with the abusers and pretend like its ok, while secretly hating them. I can't do this. Its best to never put me in a room with a person who abused someone I care about.
I worry abusing people is genetic. his dad did it, he did it, my younger brother does it. but i know this is more explained by where/by who they raised. I'm lucky to have not been raised by him, though my older brother was and he never abused.so I'm just worried if it might be in the family blood to abuse. Will I some day change and stop being me?

another Hugs for you



yeah I don't know about that, I guess maybe if they changed. But the ones I know of keep doing the bad things even if they are 80. Me and my siblings are just waiting for them to die. If you're able to feel sympathy for them, then you are far better then us. those situations dictate.





if the guy is following her to the bathroom, I too would presume he up to no good. I presume most people are untrustworthy until I know them, as such I pay attention to those around me, If I seem to be being followed I'll make appropriate preparations. I will take alternate routes home when driving if I've noticed a car been following me, Its saved me at least twice



Its turned into a really sad thread. :'(


eye rolling? what do you mean with that? o.O <tilts head>

I think leafplant is rolling her eyes because she didn't get a hug too.

When I stated all men are evil, I was being sarcastic, many times thats what it seems women think of men. and I can understand why after what I been through as well.

When I got counseling it was more then a decade later after the fact, most of that time I was homeless living on the road, a gypsy.

I have so much sympathy for anyone who has suffered abuse at the hand of a loved or trusted one. As an adult, I've been abused by a spouse, but I can't imagine how difficult it would be for a child to suffer abuse at the hands of parents or other close family members. My heart goes out to all of you who have gone through this, and I hope that those who haven't yet found a path of healing are able to.

Did all women think that of you? I know from a post in another thread that you have children, so what does your wife say?

Also, if you really don't believe that all men are evil, then why have you been making excuses for men to be violent in this thread? Surely, given the abuse that you say that you have gone through, you wouldn't want them to happen to other people? I'm really sorry that happened to you but I really do think that a therapist or counsellor would be the one to help you. I'm not sure that I understand why thought that therapy wouldn't help.

I am a single full time parent.

I don't feel that I am evil, and I know not all men are evil, just I have a lot of PTSD because of their abuse of me.
I was not trying to make excuses for men to be violent, if anything I was trying to reason a way to reduce those problems in society without having to lock them up after the fact. and as I said I didn't have any answers, but gave one suggestion out of the thought of using sex as a carrot to get men into domestic counseling as a way to reduce the over all problems.
and all I been getting is attacked, which your trying to continue with when I dropped the subject.

I am getting counseling. I am trying to get back on disability so I have too.
and their stuffing me with all kinds of meds thats messing with my head, I have not fully adjusted to them yet.

As for what women think of me? hell I just glance around a bar and I am told not to look at them, and thats happened to me more then once, and not just around bars, and people, mostly women treat me like I am some sort of creep just because I have self esteem and confidence issues along with being autistic, which doesn't help. leaves me feeling I am being judged for all the wrong other men have done to them.

I wonder where Januaryman is these days?

He always seems like a nice chap.