Well, it finally might happen.

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I've got a massive laundry list of requirements, true. I'm also extremely selective and quite shallow when it comes to a guy's appearance. It's got naught to do with any societal factors, however. I don't give a s**t what "society" thinks are acceptable male qualities, and I've never really been into the kind of guy that NT women seem to fawn all over. I tend to ignore NTs and their expectations whenever possible, because they have nothing to do with me or who I am.

Right now, though, I'd "settle" for a guy who's the opposite of short, overweight/obese, narrow-minded, conservative, homely, 50+, and stupid. In this backwater burg, however, I have a snowball's chance in hell of meeting a dude like that, unless he's in high school. And I'm not a paedophile.

Whoa . . . so no guys at all in your age range and single? Somehow i think you exaggerate a bit. If that is true, then you live in the middle of nowhere and your only option would be to move out . . . not sure how you would handle it since most of us dont do well with sudden change like that. Not to mention the current financial situation and other complications. In the end, it boils down to what you will do to improve the quality of your life . . . same goes for everyone, everywhere.

No...nor, more to the point, in the age range in which I date. This IS the middle of nowhere, or it might as well be. You're absolutely right: I do need to move, and I've known this since I moved back here (long story). Ideally, I'd be in NYC or its environs...but that'd require my winning the lottery. I really don't know what I could feasibly to do improve my lot, save for splurging on a solo weekend or two in NYC, in a desperate and potentially-dangerous attempt to re-enact "Looking For Mr. Goodbar."

That's where it becomes a patience game . . . the underlying question is, "How long are you willing to wait?" You may not have to choose a city, but say some mid-point. As an example, i live about 40 minutes from two major cities. Cheaper than being near the larger cities, yet far enough away that i dont feel strangled by overcrowding and traffic.