Why do women always like to mess with guys?

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The point she was trying to make was the fact generalisations are stupid and Ken M is an idiot for contuinuing to enforce them.

I did met one women that was totally honest and straght with me. But we grew apart and I have no regrets. I feel I have already found the dimond, but its not meant to be. She is the execption that proves the rule. Every other women I was interested in has screwed with me or used me in some way.

How come everytime I express my feelings on WP I get attacked? I let everyone else rant and express there feelings. But when I do it I am somehow wrong? Why the double standard?

*YAWN* Another chauvinistic, sexist, bigoted rant from KenM, well there's a surprise. A little bit of advice KenM: Women do not like sexist, bigoted, chauvinistic men. I am so tired of you tarring all women with the same brush. I have never said anything to you before about this because I thought, at first, you may have been going through a lot of upset and people do mouth off about the opposite sex when they get hurt, it happens. But I do believe you have gone too far now. What's the betting you wouldn't like it if someone posted 'all men are liars' or something like that? BTW, I would never do this as I know that not all men are liars or pricks, there are some very nice men out there. But I bet you would be the first to advocate how 'not all men are like this', so I would appreciate it if you do the courtesy of granting women the same rights that YOU expect.

I wouldn't know given as I have never personally lied to a guy, whereas I have been lied to by many guys, but I'm not going to tar them all with the same brush am I? I have been rejected by guys loads of times and fobbed off with their endless stream of lies, but that doesn't mean I'm going to go around and say 'all men are pricks' or 'all men are liars'. I'm sure that you would have plenty to say if I did that.....




I could say the same about men who have treated me this way. Yes KenM, men behave like this too, even though you don't believe it they do!! ! But I actually have the decency not to say things like you have said above in this quote of yours as to say things like this would be incredibly irrational and untrue. I think that your continuing rants like this about women are hugely offensive, particularly when you consider the fact that women have had their hearts broken too. Or maybe those who have been sexually assaulted in the past (like myself) might find rants like these offensive, particularly with your reference to women getting some kind of power trip (as men who have assaulted women do it for the power trip duh), did you ever stop to think that? (Obviously not, I have answered my own question here really haven't I?) Your arguments are so one sided its unbelieveable. I do feel for those who have their hearts broken on here because of their lack of success with the opposite or same sex, but I think your attitude needs to change. You need to stop being chauvinistic, sexist and a bigot otherwise your chances of success with any woman are just going to continue to get slimmer and slimmer. And you will have no-one to blame other than yourself. I know I sound very harsh, but I think behaviour like this from a man your age is despicable.

So I should just let people continue to treat me like crap and a door mat? I have no right to feel like I do? If I forgot how people messed with me in the past I know I will get hurt again. I am not going to let anyone screw or lie to me again.

I challenge anyone here to go through everything I have. Always being rejected, never going on a date, no phsyical contact. Then not having the feelings I do. I am sorry to paint most women like this but I am always getting dumped and rejected, I would not blame a women feeling the same way if the same thing happened to them.

Get some perspective. If having a woman tell you she just wants to be friends when actually she doesn't is what you consider being treated like crap and a doormat then you haven't ever been mistreated. That isn't mistreatment. A woman who married you and slept with your best friend would be mistreatment. A woman who stole all your money would be mistreatment. A woman who found out what you were allergic to and slipped it into your food would be mistreatment. What you are complaining about is literally nothing. As long as you consider something like that to be mistreatment, a long term relationship is impossible.

Buit a short term relationship isn't impossible. You've had them. You broke up with a woman when she wouldn't stop smoking pot. I've been posting here awhile too and remember these posts. Do I now get to go ballistic and call all men liars when you claim to "never go on a date"?

She was just deliberately doing that to show how stupid it looks. But no, you don't generalize people. It's a very likeable quality in you.

It's because we're evil and we are all plotting against you.
I am going to be thrown out of the Super Secret World Society of Demon Women for admitting this.

Yep.

Remember to sing after me, 'Don't want no teenage queen, just want my M-14.'

You can then use the M-14 on the evil minions of Satan (Eve just couldn't handle herself around that snake; it's just so long); if Adam had an M-14, he could have shot Eve and the snake, and mankind would now be living in peaceful bliss, along with Satan and his minions (i.e., dead).

The world would be better off, anyway.

No I don't think you should allow people to treat you like a door mat, no-one deserves that. And you have every right to feel the way you do, but what I think is that you should, perhaps, express how you feel differently because then people may feel more sympathetic and understanding towards you. But because you write such bigoted things and tar all women with the same brush, people on here may find you difficult to sympathise with and see you as being as how you write your posts. I don't know you, for all I know you may be a very nice person with many good qualities. But the way in which you write your posts and render yourself here suggest otherwise and so you are only doing yourself a total and utter dis-service here KenM.

My suggestion would be, if you do get hurt by someone, yes project how you feel, you have that right. But perhaps in a way that says 'I don't understand why she rejected me because...' then list any good qualities you think you may have that you think you may have. Also try and state how you approach women. Many people with autism and Asperger's have problems approaching someone they like and can come across in a way that may render themselves odd, eccentric etc and hence we all, at some time, have had problems catching someone's eye, including myself many many times. So if you do have problems in that regard, it's nothing to be ashamed about, just state it as many people on here are in the same boat as you. But please, don't say anything defamatory about women when you do so. If you have a problem with a woman lying her backside off to you, then that is only reflective of her as a person and not all of us. I don't then expect you to not say you dislike the woman who has offended or upset you, but please don't throw it all on the rest of us women, that is all.



This is a fair enough statement. You should not forget people who have messed with you because then you can learn from experience and, hopefully, see the same kind of crap in other people. But the key is here, while never forgetting crappy people, do not dwell on it either. I know this is easier said than done because I used to dwell on people like this. People who lie, cheat etc are not worth you dwelling on them, they are not worth your headspace. Dwelling on it just makes you bitter and resentful. This then poses new problems for you. Bitterness and resentment are personality traits that, in my experience, most men ( and I suppose women as well) avoid like the plague as it oozes out of you like a bad smell and brings other people down. The sad thing is is that the bitter and resentful person themselves doesn't quite realise this (again this is from my own personal experience), and so when you get rejected for the umpteenth time, it then adds to these negative qualities and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. It then becomes a seemingly never-ending vicious circle that becomes harder and harder to get out of. I still struggle with my bitter, resentful feelings but, somehow, I have managed to keep a lid on them by trying to project my more positive aspects. I don't lie to people, I do let them know of my demons, I just don't make a big deal of them and make more of a deal about my positive aspects, such as the fact that I'm always up for a laugh, I'm hard-working etc etc.



I feel your pain, I went through this when I was in my teens all the way through to when I was a young adult. I'm now 27 years old and, when I was about 22 or so, I decided not to bother looking for anyone anymore because I couldn't handle all the pain I had been put through any longer. All the false promises, lies, cheating and deceit and duplicitous natures of others that I had had to endure was the last straw for me at that point. So I led the single for a couple of years and was quite happy at not having the hassle of worrying about someone who I knew I loved more than they loved me or if I was going to be betrayed yet again. I then met someone who I thought was nice. So I started seeing him. I then found out a couple of months later that he was leading a double life. He was seeing me on one hand, but then he also had a fiance who he was living with and who he had been with for seven years. That was not the greatest way to be welcomed back into the world of dating

Oh, and the last part of your statement above does actually suggest to me that you DO know that, in fact, not all women are the same. So good on you for acknowledging this. I know first hand that the world of dating can be immensely tough having been treated the way I have: I have been violently abused in a relationship, I have been lied to, cheated on, told I was not good enough, rejected countless times, made to feel ugly etc etc so I do know your pain, I'm sure quite a few of us on here do. So chin up, project yourself in a different way that isn't so defamatory and I'm sure a lot more people will be sympathetic to your plight and you may then get the responses or help you might be looking for.

Thanks.

Yeha it was bloody awful. Then people like Ken M complain they are being "Mistreated" becase some woman tries to let him down gently. Pathetic. He wouldn't know mistreatment if it hit him in the face in this regard.



1) I'm sure there are hundreds of people on this site alone who have been through a hell of a lot WORSE in regards to problems with the opposite sex, myself included.
2) You are a liar. I've seen you post threads before about dates you've been on

Do you ever wonder whether it's the bitter vibe you give off that puts women off?

I do need to tell everyone I am sorry for my statements generalizing all women. What I should have said is 99% of the women I have dealt with are like that not all women. Yes I have been on a few dates, but they never work out. I feel I am not being respected when they use the "lets be friends" line. I know they don't really mean it. I tell them to be honest they don't have to give me a reason why they don't like me. They can just tell me they are not interested. But they think they are doing me a favor by not being honest when it has the oppisite effect. I ha ve had a few women tell me flat out they are not interested and I am fine with it.

You ever wonder why I am so bitter is becase of the rejection? Its. A cruel circle.

Thankyou for apologising and admitting you were wrong about the generaliations.

As far as the friends thing goes. People here have told you why women do this. We are not mind readers. For all the woman knows you might be a psycho and try to hurt her if she tells you the truth.

Im sorry to say its the real psychos who are to blame for this, making it impossible for women to tell how a guy is going to react to her rejection.



Have you told them these EXACT words when they wont tell you why they arne't interested? Because telling them to "be honest" is pretty vague.

Also they might be being honest. Maybe they don't know exactly why they aren't interested.

I can understand wanting to keep oneself safe (I know the OP said "women", but it could apply to guys as well), but is there a way to distinguish between being cautious and being paranoid?

Maybe. But what? Thats the problem. No-one knows. One might be told they're being paranoid and the next week they're murdered by some guy/girl they rejected. The psychopaths have made it hard for everyone else in this regard.

Oh. Sorry about that... you know, aspie interpretation of words is usually literal and all that... I thought she was being serious...


No, you shouldn't forget it. But give a woman a chance at least first before just saying that she's just "another liar" and chucking her out the door. Give her a chance, and then if she does something to validate your fears (i.e. lie to you on a serious matter or manipulate you), get rid of her. You can protect yourself without generalizations.


Okay, I'll accept your challenge.


I'm 1 for 14, and that 1 was pretty much a dismal failure on my part, while she was gracious enough to even give me a chance... (she later told me when we broke up that she never felt anything for me...)


Even in my recently-ended relationship, we never went out on any real dates. We were both just too busy.


again, the one relationship I've ever been able to even get off the ground didn't get far enough to engage in much physical contact, other than that I'm so deprived (i'm one of those aspies that craves touch to an extreme) it's a wonder I can sleep at night...



Well, I don't have the feelings you do, so I guess that means I win. I see only one constant in my long string of failures: me. I'm the failure... it's not any woman's fault that I can't get into a relationship, just mine.

I know the friend I mentioned earlier had major issues with trusting people, even before she and I began corresponding.

But when she told me the truth, all I did was tell her that it wasn't necessary to hide it, and I apologized to her for a few errors in judgment on my part. In other words, whatever fears she had were unfounded.

In either case, it sounds like she had cut contact with all of her opposite-sex friends, which usually indicates that the guy she was dating may have been the jealous type who was uncomfortable with her having friends of the opposite sex. Or that she is afraid that if he saw her e-mailing even a platonic friend of the opposite sex, he would think she was cheating on him.