A solemn declaration and a statement of intent...

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CrinklyCrustacean
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28 Oct 2010, 4:58 am

Crion87 wrote:
And again you people think me evil. Again, I am unmoved.


You are not evil, you are misguided.



ToadOfSteel
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28 Oct 2010, 8:33 am

hale_bopp wrote:
Theres worse things in life than not being someones darling you know.
Way way worse.
If you would rather have a life threatening disease or one that makes people not want to come within 5 meters of you than be single then you're nothing but a drama queen, sorry.


Given the case of the terminal disease, if it meant that someone would actually love me in the little time i would have left, I most definitely would take it... At least I would die loved.



hale_bopp
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28 Oct 2010, 9:19 am

ToadOfSteel wrote:
hale_bopp wrote:
Theres worse things in life than not being someones darling you know.
Way way worse.
If you would rather have a life threatening disease or one that makes people not want to come within 5 meters of you than be single then you're nothing but a drama queen, sorry.


Given the case of the terminal disease, if it meant that someone would actually love me in the little time i would have left, I most definitely would take it... At least I would die loved.


Would they though? If it was something really bad?



Ambrose_Rotten
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28 Oct 2010, 9:52 am

hale_bopp wrote:
ToadOfSteel wrote:
hale_bopp wrote:
Theres worse things in life than not being someones darling you know.
Way way worse.
If you would rather have a life threatening disease or one that makes people not want to come within 5 meters of you than be single then you're nothing but a drama queen, sorry.


Given the case of the terminal disease, if it meant that someone would actually love me in the little time i would have left, I most definitely would take it... At least I would die loved.


Would they though? If it was something really bad?


I'm not sure that he was thinking of the contagious aspect.



Keeno
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28 Oct 2010, 10:59 am

nthach wrote:
The OP sounds like that guy who was telling aspie men to date women from 3rd world countries. No. Like I said out of fun, if I want to date a meek Asian I'll go to the local Lexus dealer.


I know the guy you mean. While I don't condone his sexism, and his anti-feminism, what he says about how Aspies (or anyone else struggling romantically not just Aspies) should date women in Third World countries is a good point and seems valid to me. In economic terms, and in terms of the human development in different places, you stand a better chance. I agree with that in so far as your chances of actually getting a woman, of course there are a number of caveats where you have to be careful about it too.



billsmithglendale
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28 Oct 2010, 4:40 pm

Keeno wrote:
nthach wrote:
The OP sounds like that guy who was telling aspie men to date women from 3rd world countries. No. Like I said out of fun, if I want to date a meek Asian I'll go to the local Lexus dealer.


I know the guy you mean. While I don't condone his sexism, and his anti-feminism, what he says about how Aspies (or anyone else struggling romantically not just Aspies) should date women in Third World countries is a good point and seems valid to me. In economic terms, and in terms of the human development in different places, you stand a better chance. I agree with that in so far as your chances of actually getting a woman, of course there are a number of caveats where you have to be careful about it too.


Exactly. You have to look at yourself and what kind of value proposition you are in terms of what you bring to a relationship.

Example -- A lot of guys here in this part of the WP forums feel like they are the "lemons" on the car dealership lot of the dating world -- they're getting overlooked, they perceive that by the standards of Western women (right or wrong) they are not a value. Thus, no dates, no GF's, etc. We can argue back and forth until we turn blue who is being unreasonable here or spoiled, but the end result is that we have a lot of dateless Aspies, especially guys, complaining here on WP.

Someone coming from a 3rd world country, unless they are in the upper or middle class, is coming from a whole other viewpoint. Here, we worry about things like getting the latest iPhone, what time our favorite TV show is on, what college we're going to get into, etc. People from third world countries often have to worry about where their next meal is coming from, finding a clean water source (you don't want to drink what comes out of the faucet there), and extremely high levels of crime. They may also be part of a persecuted minority in their home country, or just tired of the corruption, kangaroo court legal system, and impoverished/illiterate attitude of many of the people who live around them.

Suddenly a guy in a first world nation, especially countries like the U.S., U.K., etc., isn't looking too bad, even if he's an Aspie. In fact, a lot of these women see these guys and wonder why the hell no one else seems to want them (and some of us were wondering the same thing). The guy has a good education, possibly a good job/career, family, and lives in a country that actually seems to give a crap about its citizens. Clean running water, free education, low crime, and someone who loves you because finally he's appreciated by someone -- what's not to like?

And yes -- for guys who maybe aren't very good at social graces, knowing how to dress, how to make friends, are isolated socially, etc., they have a lot in common with someone coming from outside the culture -- both are outsiders. And as the NT 3rd world GF or wife wises up and learns how to dress and fit in, she helps her man. She also will tend to have some more traditional value sets that seem to mesh well with the homebody/"I like my routine" life that Aspie guys seem so focused on -- in fact, she may prefer that lifestyle as well.

So what's wrong with that, and why hate on people who find each other and are finally happy?



nthach
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28 Oct 2010, 4:57 pm

My family roots are in a 3rd world country and I go to a school filled with foreign students from Asia and honestly, I don't find the appeal.

Besides, I don't want to be used by someone seeking asylum and I think the language barrier will KILL me.



billsmithglendale
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28 Oct 2010, 5:12 pm

nthach wrote:
My family roots are in a 3rd world country and I go to a school filled with foreign students from Asia and honestly, I don't find the appeal.

Besides, I don't want to be used by someone seeking asylum and I think the language barrier will KILL me.


Lots of people from 3rd world countries speak English. Some, like Belize, have English as their official language. Others make it part of their curriculum -- In fact, a good chunk of India speaks English as a second language, and there are actually more Chinese (and yes, many parts of China are 3rd world by comparison) and Indian English speakers than the rest of the world combined (including the U.S. and U.K.)

If you don't see the appeal, fine, but some of us really are attracted to Asians (or other ethnicities).

Yes, don't get used -- but if you really are a worthwhile person (most of us are), and someone from outside of the society sees that, all the better for both. It's not like relationships in general don't have give and take in terms of concrete benefits for both parties. You don't see women (or men) rushing out to marry that homeless person or McDonald's employee with a heart of gold, do you?



nthach
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28 Oct 2010, 5:35 pm

I'm pretty much screwed as far as relationships go. But I feel the strong urge to validate myself to my social circle and break the "ice" so to speak.



Bethie
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28 Oct 2010, 10:55 pm

Crion87 wrote:
I have decided that, given the bad relationships by two separate women of Caucasian race (well, technically Eurasian with one, but she's more white though) and Australian origin, I have decided and avowed that I shall never for the rest of my life date anyone of the Caucasian race!

As far as I am concerned, they are all the same to me. Bitchy, manipulative, oh sure they seem OK when they're around and they think you're OK, but they always want to put a knife in your back sooner or later. They cannot raise children correctly either; time and again I've seen some white slut single-mother type raising children who eventually raise themselves, never showing any real love or compassion there either. They are filth.

White women are the reason I even know the meaning of the word hatred. I have an eternal emnity with the two I mentioned, and I have to make sure nonesuch of that filth ever reach me again!

Oh, and yes, I'm a white guy too, so what? I'm allowed to have my opinion even if other white racists and other such will berate me. I know I'm a 'racetraitor' at least in principle as you call it, so shut up!!



I can't understand why people have been so "cruel" to you, when you're such a charmer!

:roll:


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hyperlexian
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28 Oct 2010, 11:10 pm

nthach wrote:
I'm pretty much screwed as far as relationships go. But I feel the strong urge to validate myself to my social circle and break the "ice" so to speak.

i respect your perspective a great deal, and i am glad you are reaching out (i noticed elsewhere on WP) to discuss your approach and progress. i think you have a great stance and i am certain you will "come into your own". i believe that your positive attitude will take you very far.


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nthach
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28 Oct 2010, 11:25 pm

hyperlexian wrote:
nthach wrote:
I'm pretty much screwed as far as relationships go. But I feel the strong urge to validate myself to my social circle and break the "ice" so to speak.

i respect your perspective a great deal, and i am glad you are reaching out (i noticed elsewhere on WP) to discuss your approach and progress. i think you have a great stance and i am certain you will "come into your own". i believe that your positive attitude will take you very far.

thanks!

I've been noticing this - the amount of pessimism and negativity that circulates around on WP - not just here.