Obsessions that lead to a broken heart

Post Reply New Topic

emp

Butt out, I was not even speaking to him. I was speaking to the a***holes like yourself.

I can only speak for myself, but I've had 3 "obsessions" starting at age 18 (I'm 36 now) and I didn't know that I was "obsessed" until much later when I realized that my other special "interests"/hobbies were no longer getting my attention.

I find that I fall into these obsessions during calm periods in my life and they are with people of a certain personality. By calm I mean relatively stress free. If I have financial concerns, health concerns, work concerns, etc. those concerns take center stage and people interaction doesn't become a main focal point for me.

2 of my obsessions have lasted at least 2 years, and one for 6 months, although the longer the obsession, the weaker the influence the person has on me as time passes. I think the best advice for getting rid of an obsession at least from my perspective is to know that the worst one I got over without incident, so I'll get over any of them. The first is always the worst because you don't understand the emotion involved. Once you understand that part, you can say to yourself that you realize that you like a person because of your autism and not because of love - you really don't know this person well and the autism is causing you to think there's something there that isn't.

The last alternative is to remove the person from your thoughts completely by not going to the places this person will be at (kind of hard if you work with this person). The hardest part of removing the person from your thoughts is that you try, and then they pop back in your mind full speed and you get discouraged that it'll never go away. But it does. You have to be patient, and you can't stop your life because of your insistence on thinking about only this one person.

Ok so you weren't talking to me after all. But there's no reason to call emp that either. He isn't 'defending' anyone's actions, because really nobody's done anything wrong. Well, except you insulting Space but I think that's arisen from a misunderstanding. When I read Space's comment it seemed like a joke, you know, an exaggeration. He was using hyperbole to express his utter confusion, I think, in a humourous way.

I guess that's sort of like how when people say things like, 'whoa dude, what are you smoking?' It doesn't actually imply that you do smoke something, just that you did or said something incomprehensible to them.

You can make excuses for a few of your friends all you want. I will not tolerate being called names, this is the last place I'd suspect it. I'm given back what was received of it, don't do it again.

Defending Emp is like defending white racist on a march of racism, his religious antagonisms on this forum are clear and I’m standing up against him...

Neither I or Emp will get along on this forum, he is for trouble and discriminations, his Satanism is an excuse of the socio-pathic instigator.

Hey, dude, you were the one who was name calling. You called emp an a***hole, and I don't see anyone calling you a name here. Pay attention to Enigmatic_Oddity's tone. Nobody's blaming you for anything, and yet you continue to have a hostile tone. Calm down. Don't assume that anyone who disagrees with you is automatically allied in some frontal assault against you.



While I definately agree that some of emp's instigative antics are far from moral, this isn't the most accurate of analogies. For one thing, in regard to the "[while being] on a march of racism" part, this isn't one of his anti-Christian threads--just a thread he happened to post in. For another, I think his threads really have a feeling of parody. The white racist speaks his beliefs with seriousness, not just for his own entertainment.

Plus, shouldn't we defend people for what they didn't do, even when we dislike them? Say a bully bullies me, and then he's accused of raping me, and that isn't true. I'd hate the guy, but I would not go right on accusing him of what he didn't do with everyone else just because of that. I'd speak my mind about the whole affair, but that doesn't mean I'd call people morons or delusional just because they believed what I didn't. Again, calm down, man--rationality is critical.

sc, in case you don't get what everyone is on about, your message with all the big words in it made everyone go "Wtf did that mean?"

Just chill, and possibly translate that message into small simple words.

I was indeed not the first one to call anyone a name here. Others were, so step back for a moment "dude, which by the way I had a dog named dude once. I've never used the terminology, seems more like the talk of a street kid.

People have worked hard in this post to instigate me, then try to cover the actions of others. So you want to be able to call me names but me not respond, what am I your punching bag for idiot remarks.

Concernign racism as a comparision your deflection is noted yet inferior ultimately. His actions have targed a belief type, he is indeed an a***hole.

No one calls me names, then laughs like others say they did with it and not create a reaction from me. Back off, I never have done anything to you guys, learn some mutual respect and know when your wrong. Don't call me names and dont defend those whom say them to me then argue against me for responding to the actions of jurks.

I don't fit in your clique, I could care less, so back off. It's obvious people tried to instigate me here. You got it back, you don't have to like how I reacted to the instigations, I won't tolerate it.

I don't know anything about emp's beliefs about race or religion, and frankly they're irrelevant. He's not uttered a word on either topic, so calling him an a***hole is unwarranted. Even if he had said something about race or religion, a better response would have been simply to include your views in a discussion of the issue and not resort to personal attacks. Everyone here is entitled to their opinion and it would do you well to respect that.

And by the way, who exactly has called you what name? I can look back through the posts and if I'm not mistaken, you're the one who started name-calling. At first I thought you had simply misunderstood Space, but now it seems apparent that you're taking people's comments far too personally, and lashing out at people who are simply trying to clarify things. Now you're even lashing out at veresae, implying he's a street-kid (which imo isn't even a real insult, given that there's nothing wrong with being a street kid; but I digress).

What's so offensive about the comment that offended you anyway? Space said 'if by any chance you are sniffing glue, please stop'. He didn't say you were sniffing glue. He might've been implying it, but I don't see how it can be interpreted in anything but a joking manner. And in any case, what's so bad about sniffing glue? People use drugs for all sorts of reasons. I'm sure you don't get all defensive if someone asks you whether you drink or smoke, so why get offended about this?

Will you at least consider that people here are trying to deal with the conflict, rather than escalate it? I'm not trying to offend anyone, and I don't think Space, emp and veresae are either.

Last edited by Enigmatic_Oddity on 05 Jun 2006, 11:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I'm sorry, I was trying to sound laid back--stuff like that makes one's posts sound much calmer. I try to do that so I don't sound totally cold and pissed off, heh. I'll reftain from any dudisms from now on.



'Scuse me? Who's instigating you here? I've read this thread, and from what it looks like, Emp corrected something you said, you got mad about it, some people had trouble figuring out what you said, and you blew up in their faces and proceeded to insult them, all the while claiming that they were allied together in some kind of frontal assault against you. It just sounds irrational, man--no offense. I'm sure that your behavior is very rational in your head, and I'd love to read how. Be specific: who insulted you? Who instigated you? Who called you what name? I didn't see any name calling in emp's post, or in any of Enigmatic_Oddity's posts, or in any of mine.



I never said that racism wasn't a good analogy, just the specific "white supremecist on a march" bit. However, I don't think that racism is a good analogy either, because race isn't a choice, while religion sort of is. Doesn't excuse the behavior though. I never said he wasn't an a***hole, just that I didn't see anyone call you any names before or after, and that the act of calling him an a***hole is, well, name-calling.



Hey, I have no problems with you reacting to what you feel is wrong, and standing up for your sense of justice. That's great. And I totally respect one's right to defend onself, especially on the internet. But the thing is, while you say you have never done anything to us, you continue to say that we did things to you, when all we did was ask you what you meant and ask you to calm down. Yes, emp did some things in other threads, but we're looking at THIS thread right now. THIS thread is where we're posting. If you want to argue with emp for things he did in another thread, do it in that thread. Don't randomly switch threads and then lash out at people for being confused....



I'm not trying to instigate you, and I'm not part of any "clique." I'm just observing this, and responding, just the same as you. Calm down. In the thread about 9/11, you talk about how you have to base everything on fact, and all the while you're making judgements about other people's behavior and emotions that not only completely ignores the facts, but just seems paranoid and--to use your word--delusional. You're putting words in people's mouths, or at least their fingers. You're getting angry at people who are on your side. Believe me, I'm on your side here. I may disagree with you on the 9/11 thread, but I fully respect your right to defend yourself and your views--I never said otherwise. The problem is when you're defending yourself against attacks that aren't there. And if they are there, then point me in their direction. I see no assault on you, sc. I see a bunch of confused people trying to figure out what you said and why you're being so hostile towards them. Confusion isn't intentional, and it's most certainly not malicious. Emp may have tried to correct your grammar, but he didn't insult you or call you a name in this thread, and nobody else did, either. Just calm down and try to understand.

In this thread, I have said NOTHING insulting, harsh, or emotive. I did not call you any names either.

If you are speaking to me, why are you telling me to butt out?

Last edited by emp on 06 Jun 2006, 1:31 am, edited 2 times in total.

The problem is fact is fact, delusion is not fact. I will make judgments concerning others, judgments and false belief are entirely different things. Keep the post material relevant to the post. Go an argue the imagined government sponsored 9.11 scenario in that post.

Other then that, I have done nothing other then well in standing up for myself. There are 3 posts of conflict going on, some of which you have made things out to be in whic they are not to satisfy your interruption in this post concerning matters your not involved with.

Like emp, I would say butt out but you seem receptive enough to concern some politeness.

What is a better phrase? Mind your own business? Perhaps steer clear? or mind your own concern?

This is between me and some people who thought it would be funny to call me names, I kicked butt and I didn’t even need bubble gum. I suppose a few did not expect to be opposed so harshly, I might have even startled them.

I’m sure they will get over it, well deserved. The “trollers” have derailed this post long enough.

Ummmm... wow. Lots of bickering on this thread. Kind of getting off-topic here...

ANYWAYS. Like many of the posters above me, I've experienced this before. Ninth grade. Marching band. I was obsessed with my section leader. I don't think I'll ever be able to think of that person normally again... although I've certainly made some excellent progress. I did everything I could to forget her and to convince myself that she was really boring, which suceeded. So basically, I just have to not think of her; if I think of her, the same feelings will come back and give me hell again. I've had my closure and I can move on mentally to other girls.

There was also an ex-girlfriend I was in love with for a looooooong time after we broke up. But like the person before her, I'm just trying to forget that she ever existed. It's easier with her because she has lots of NT tendancies, so I can just choose to exaggerate them in my mind.

There IS a way out of obsessions. It's tricky, but if you're aware of what's going on in your head and pull all the right stops, you can get out of them pretty easily.

emp,

I'm not talking about you here, people want to turn this post into the topics of 3 differing posts.

As I said emp butt out, at very least you should quit blantently cuasing social problems with others beliefs . Perhaps you enjoy it to much but it's got to stop, you have no respect and just stir up trouble to satasify some sick desire of enjoyment between your ears.

sc, first you say you are speaking to me:

Then you say the opposite:



You are contradicting yourself!

And for the record, Enigmatic_Oddity, Space, and Tequila did not call you any names -- YOU called them a***holes, or you called me an a***hole, it is not clear who you called an a***hole because you contradict yourself and write incoherent nonsensical messages. You are so full of emotion currently that it has made you temporarily unable to write meaningful messages.

Satanism? God, I'd better stop talking to him

There you go butting in again, I clearly defined my responsive pattern to initial insults. Emp, you are an a***hole, just look at your posts. Now mind your own business you jurk.

There are many people I get along with online here, peopel that PM me for clearifications then there are arses like yourself that cuase problems. As I said, mind your own business and back off.''Your a whole different matter of concern, your manipulating this situation. People have left this forum becuase of you, they have told me so.

You have nothing to do with this post, enough with it.