Major_G wrote:
Daryl_Blonder wrote:
Aspergians play by a different set of rules. A hallmark of autism, I believe, is a complete lack of nurturing capacity, despite a genuine underlying compassion for our fellow man. Like many of us on here, I have absolutely no interest in sharing my life with another person, having children, or starting a family. I'm completely in my own world. Whenever I had a crush on someone (and I had some pretty heavy ones!) the relationship I idealized was one where we had a close emotional and physical relationship, and we could tell each other anything we wanted to without fear of being pushed away. There was never any intention or desire to cohabitate, have children, or give up my autonomy. NTs don't want this. They are programmed to continue the human race. Women can sense this lack of nuturing capacity in us and it's part of what turns them off.
I'm not so sure about what you're saying here. Just like there are completely varying types & personalities of those with Asperger's, I would imagine that their goals may be different, too. For instance, I wish I had somebody to share my life with. In fact, it's one of the things I have most wanted in my life. However, my nature fights my desires in that I've become very accustomed to being alone. Also, there are lots of Aspergians out there with children, and I'm sure many of them have always wanted children (I'm not one of them). I happened to notice you do a bit of acting. There are lots of people w/ Asperger's who only do technical jobs & couldn't fathom why anyone would want to do something other than programming or mechanics.
All Aspergians are indeed different, but what I was saying is that how one feels about this depends on how far they are along the spectrum. If you look at people who are really severe, those who can barely live on their own (if at all), not only are they so withdrawn into their own world they not only don’t have the capacity to harbor nurturing capabilities, they are also completely asexual.
A person with Asperger’s can certainly want to be nurturing. My theory is just that if they do, they aren’t that severe.
Refer to Temple Grandin, who is clearly quite far along the spectrum: “The part of other people that has emotional relationships is not a part of me.”
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05 Feb 2011, 11:48 pm
