rude women?

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The point is that a lot of rude people don't mean to be honest with you - a lot of women (as do a lot of men - equal opportunities and all that) just want to hurt and use people. You don't want to be with anyone like that, and I think being treated with basic respect is the very least a person could ask for.

As for the rest of what you say: I don't disagree with it too much.

Well, I'm ShamelessGit, so being treated with respect is not my number one priority.

Hmm, well actually, I usually tell women that I prefer it when they are direct with me, so if they called me a weirdo or something like that while rejecting me, then that would be more respectful than trying to do something "tactful" that I may not understand, because then she would be deliberately disregarding my wishes. Deliberately disregarding someone's expressed wishes is much more hurtful to me than most of the things that people usually associate with rudeness.

I've often made this mistake over and over (and over and over) in regards to men. I am told I am stand-offish or cold so I will really give a guy the benefit of the doubt that maybe he doesn't notice I like him, or he doesn't read my signals. But here's the conclusion I came to in recent years (I'm 36).... if we are having that much of a communication error this early then it's probably just not a good match. *siggggggh* At least I'd like to think I learned this lesson but I'm currently enthralled with an Aspie man now and I just keep trying and trying and trying.

rude women have a thing called making fun of mentally infused switches. they like to make a man feel stupid about the situation and they have ways of making things look very awkward. that's why i say oh boohoo. your pathetic.

I was going to stay out of this one until I just got blasted by some random woman tonight (single-barrel at least, not both.)

We were in the toilet paper aisle at WalMart and we both were considering our options (at least 20 feet apart.) She was neither attractive nor ugly - I had absolutely no interest in her whatsoever. Zero. She then chose a large amount of WM's house-brand TP. I chimed in as politely as possible something along the lines of, "I hope you don't mind a comment but I just bought a bunch of that same stuff and it really wasn't very good - I'm replacing it with something better right now." and gestured to something a couple bucks more but HAD to be better quality. I'd have done the same for anyone.

She just gave me a short glare and shot, "Well I DO mind!" and huffed away.



Ooooo-kay, lady. Wherever you are, enjoy your micro-thin, scratchy TP! 48 rolls, you'll be stuck with it a good long time. I tried to warn you!

Maybe she just likes a specific brand of TP and took it as an unwelcome criticism of her choice to use that brand.

Possible... but one doesn't normally debate for ~5min only to choose a preferred brand. The reaction was too large for such a small comment. Maybe she thought she was getting hit on? [shrug] I tried to make it plainly obvious that was never the intent, nor was I even overly friendly or gruff.

I can aaalllllmoost understand why most women hate that. (Hey men! A trip to your local commission-based store like Future Shop will provide that perspective after 5-6 money-grubbing salesbeasts all try very hard to get a sale from you. Even if they're polite enough, by the time the 7th genuinely-helpful clerk offers a hand you're just about ready to tell 'em to f**k off. I usually don't because of how rude that is, but the instinctual impulse is to just let 'em have it!)

Oh well, when she uses the first square of that junk she'll realize I wasn't kidding!



...it's worth mentioning that a few aisles over, some muscle-man was arguing loudly with the staff because they were out of his brand of milk and now his whole day is ruined, etc. Oy.... PEOPLE are just plain rude!

Every post you make illustrates clearly why you're having problems with finding a partner.
You are often incredibly rude and patronising to women who try and advise you so I fail to see what the point is of you asking for advice in the first place.

When you are called out on your rudeness you move off and start another thread.

Make no mistake, if you are rude to people, they won't like you.

Lol wish I'd been there to see that!

It was an unusual reaction imo as most people like helpful input - I would as all additional information is useful when choosing a product

Some are just grumpy and uppity though - that's the chance you take

There's also the aspect that she didn't ask for your input so felt you invaded her personal space

I was just astouned when i read your definition of "rude". For me it would be rude if you insult one or try to hurt one, as example: "Piss off." "f**k off", "Get away you lame geek." or whatever.

But if i wish to be left alone by someone, once and for all, why should it be rude to tell someone, what i am thinking?

So "Please, leave me alone once and for all." would be absolutely not rude for me, as long as i just say what i think and do not add insults with it. That wouldnt mean for me, that this person is a bad person or anything, its just what it meants, that i dont want anything to do with him., not that this person has less worth or anything. So about 99,9999999999% of all humans fit into "I dont want anything to do with you." for me, that doesnt mean that i hate so many people on this earth, but i am barely able to spend enough time and energy for the few friends i have, so every new person i start to met would mean to loose another friend, for whom i wouldnt have time anymore. Another problem is, that i dont generally enjoy spending time and talking with other people, like most other persons do. If i have no common interest with others it is just tiring me, so i dont want to do that with person that i dont even know yet.

In the opposite i also wouldnt feel insulted, if someone else told me, that he/she didnt want anything to do with me. What use would i have of gathering time with a person who is unhappy with it?

Billis, honest advice here...

You need to settle your internal situation, mate. It's obvious you're a hurricane inside, and you're feeling awfully burned by women, therefore bitter and resentful toward them. That s**t will seethe out through you and every woman will spot it from a mile away. A week ago I used to be a horribly misanthropic person, and once I started getting over that, the way everyone started reacting to me absolutely shocked me to the core. To think I thought I could hide it so well, I was probably broadcasting bitterness and pessimism like a neon sign without realizing it. You probably are too.

Knock it off, mate, and you'll start doing way better I can assure you.

I actually don't mind the Coles brand TP because it's value for money and not too bad. The rolls have twice as many sheets on them /OT

Maybe I didn't explain well my point of view but I was explaining just the opposite of what you understood. Some people consider indifference as rudeness because they can't understand that they can't try to date a unknown person and expecting this person being always receptive and cheerful. That would be like living in a musical.
I was talking about people that are being a nuisance trying to flirt someone, and when they are ignored or they get a "leave me alone" comment, they feel embittered, as if they didn't consider the failure.

To me, being rude in the date scene is when people you know and like don't care about your feelings. There has to be a bond.
But when you try to date someone you barely know (or don't know at all) it's not really rude if they just ignore you. We are constantly being ignored and rejected by unknown people. We are not the center of the world, we can't expect all people around us to be amazed with our existence. A lot of people out there are convinced they deserve attention of all the members of the opposite sex they like (or same sex if gay). It's not a problem of "rudeness" but "maturity", "knowing our possibilities" and "thicker skin".

I don't know if I explained it well, today my English is especially deplorable.

Last edited by BanjoGirl on 03 Jan 2013, 8:11 am, edited 3 times in total.

*nods in agreement* Us women are terribly perceptive and men seem to be naive to this. While the guy thinks they're getting rejected due to their looks or their income, in actual fact the woman could be disinterested due to something they see deeper below the surface.

it's worth noting that this radar/instinct isn't foolproof in the slightest, obviously (otherwise nobody would ever get into a bad relationship), but it's all we have at first when facing the opposite sex. some people can hide their bright neon signs well enough under superficial charm, but i'd hazard a guess that aspies may struggle with this. so it's more effective to change the inside than to gloss it over.

BlueMax, some people are shy about talking about bodily functions with strangers, and that includes toilet paper brands. she may have been mortified.